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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I watched Free Willy with my daughter. Later on she decided to free her 6 pet mice into the house. FML

#15838713
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27572) - you deserved it (7694)

On 04/18/2011 at 8:48pm - kids - by Jukka -

Today, I was fired from my job. Apparently getting shot is no valid reason to stay home. FML

#15833093
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58614) - you deserved it (4401)

On 04/18/2011 at 11:09am - work - by davka -

Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's house. I had a shower while he went downstairs. As I went to say goodbye to him, his mother muttered "slut" while pouring him orange juice. FML

#15831964
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38315) - you deserved it (20657)

On 04/18/2011 at 5:34am - intimacy - by sllaggy -

Today, my boyfriend punched a hole in a door. This is on top of the broken handle, cracked sink top, dented fridge, and other holes in the wall he has also made. We are 4 months into our year lease. I don't think we are getting our $720 deposit back. FML

#15781081
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23729) - you deserved it (17492)

On 04/14/2011 at 2:59am - money - by Username -

Today, I ran a red light in front of a cop and got pulled over. My friend thought it would be funny to throw a knife in my lap and scream "Help me officer, he has a knife!" FML

#15773415
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44602) - you deserved it (6728)

On 04/13/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by FrOsTy25 -

Today, I got attacked by my own dog. I don't know what will be harder, telling everyone how my dog thought I was a robber or explaining to them why a 25 year old man owns a poodle. FML

#15766373
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22415) - you deserved it (15026)

On 04/13/2011 at 3:05am - animals - by Username -

Today, I watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes, thinking "wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized that I'd been watching my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes. FML

#15762337
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17736) - you deserved it (36547)

On 04/12/2011 at 10:20pm - animals - by Anonymous -

Today, while at an important meeting at work, I got to watch helplessly as a police officer gave me a parking meter ticket. Added to that my boss chewed me out for "never paying attention and staring out the window during meetings". FML

#15756717
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20688) - you deserved it (9976)

On 04/12/2011 at 3:25pm - work - by Kevin -

Today, I wore a Stanford college T-shirt to school. My Spanish teacher took one look at it and said "You wish". FML

#15752266
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33027) - you deserved it (7602)

On 04/12/2011 at 6:09am - misc - by anon -

Today, I broke up with my now ex-girlfriend for the 5th time. She still hasn't got the hint. FML

#15749336
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34950) - you deserved it (11526)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:08am - love - by husks -

Today, the maintenance man 'fixed' a leak in my apartment by flooding the place. FML

#15744069
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23617) - you deserved it (2340)

On 04/11/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by sproket -

Today, we had a tornado warning and I told my parents I loved them, just in case. My dad just said "see you in Kansas". FML

#15733028
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24991) - you deserved it (7512)

On 04/10/2011 at 11:26pm - misc - by anonymous -

Today, is my birthday. Everyone forgot except my stalker. He rang the door bell the second it turned 12:00. FML

#15693187
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41697) - you deserved it (3541)

On 04/08/2011 at 11:03am - love - by hopeless -



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