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Today, my mom confessed that she has to make up compliments to give to prove me wrong when I said she can never say positive things about me. FML

#16053231
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22097) - you deserved it (2956)

On 05/05/2011 at 2:13am - misc - by wow -

Today, my mother told me she forgot what a verb is. I'm homeschooled, and she's my teacher. FML

#16052979
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36051) - you deserved it (4463)

On 05/05/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by asadwa -

Today, I can't attend an interview for a great job because I have an exam. An exam I need to pass in order to have a great job like the one I'm missing the interview for. FML

#16039154
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29525) - you deserved it (3556)

On 05/03/2011 at 11:24pm - work - by Username -

Today, my dad hid the toilet paper and is charging me 50 cents a roll. FML

#16038977
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30594) - you deserved it (5172)

On 05/03/2011 at 11:12pm - misc - by wiper -

Today, while on a first date with a guy who turned out to be twice my age, we were playing video games at the theatre before the movie started. Suddenly he falls face first while having a seizure. The EMT asked if my "dad" had a history of epilepsy. FML

#16030351
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18431) - you deserved it (27449)

On 05/03/2011 at 8:15am - love - by cbolig -

Today, I met my new neighbors when they backed into my parked car. FML

#16030306
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26602) - you deserved it (2410)

On 05/03/2011 at 8:04am - misc - by Mayshod -

Today, after teaching my 4 year old son about the concept of "Stranger Danger," we had gone to a park full of people. When I walked up to him to tell him we had to leave, he ran, screaming "Stranger! Don't touch me!" FML

#16028300
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32433) - you deserved it (7010)

On 05/03/2011 at 1:01am - kids - by armywife980 -

Today, I sent a kinky text message to my boyfriend. Within minutes I got a reply of 'whoever this is, fuck off and give my girlfriend's phone back.' Apparently I'm so bad at writing sexy messages that my boyfriend thought it was a prank from someone who'd stolen my phone. FML

#16016307
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36191) - you deserved it (9561)

On 05/02/2011 at 4:34am - intimacy - by ohtheshame -

Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML

#16009360
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13773) - you deserved it (42527)

On 05/01/2011 at 8:21pm - animals - by Cassie -

Today, my mom informed me that she doesn't wash my clothes anymore. Instead, she sprays them with Febreze to "save money". FML

#16009098
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31849) - you deserved it (7195)

On 05/01/2011 at 8:01pm - misc - by dirtyclothess -

Today, my drunk dad started yelling at my dog for not having a job. FML

#15962479
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43210) - you deserved it (4663)

On 04/28/2011 at 11:53am - animals - by Cecilly2010 -

Today, I bought my boyfriend a gold watch for our 2 year anniversary. He bought me a jar of Nutella. FML

#15961473
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35355) - you deserved it (8640)

On 04/28/2011 at 9:16am - love - by nuttedthefout -

Today, I once again told my son he needed a job and a girlfriend because I simply could not keep him in my house anymore. He yelled, "No, I can do whatever I want!" Then went back to playing video games. He's 38. FML

#15960842
365 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27523) - you deserved it (39773)

On 04/28/2011 at 7:07am - kids - by oldmama728 -



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