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Today, while at an important meeting at work, I got to watch helplessly as a police officer gave me a parking meter ticket. Added to that my boss chewed me out for "never paying attention and staring out the window during meetings". FML

#15756717
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16846) - you deserved it (9213)

On 04/12/2011 at 3:25pm - work - by Kevin -

Today, I wore a Stanford college T-shirt to school. My Spanish teacher took one look at it and said "You wish". FML

#15752266
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28733) - you deserved it (7061)

On 04/12/2011 at 6:09am - misc - by anon -

Today, I broke up with my now ex-girlfriend for the 5th time. She still hasn't got the hint. FML

#15749336
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28043) - you deserved it (9135)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:08am - love - by husks -

Today, the maintenance man 'fixed' a leak in my apartment by flooding the place. FML

#15744069
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19311) - you deserved it (2044)

On 04/11/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by sproket -

Today, we had a tornado warning and I told my parents I loved them, just in case. My dad just said "see you in Kansas". FML

#15733028
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20071) - you deserved it (896)

On 04/10/2011 at 11:26pm - misc - by anonymous -

Today, is my birthday. Everyone forgot except my stalker. He rang the door bell the second it turned 12:00. FML

#15693187
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35320) - you deserved it (2709)

On 04/08/2011 at 11:03am - love - by hopeless -

Today, I stepped outside my office building for a smoke break and I witnessed a mugging so I ran over to stop it. I succeeded in getting mugged instead of the original target. I then couldn't get into my building until a coworker left an hour later. My boss was mad and still doesn't believe me. FML

#15692090
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22695) - you deserved it (4634)

On 04/08/2011 at 7:58am - work - by Fired -

Today, I was in the emergency room. The doctor told me that my injuries and back problems are the intensity of those after a car accident. I slipped on a grape. FML

#15691583
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29548) - you deserved it (4484)

On 04/08/2011 at 6:35am - health - by ridella -

Today, I was talking to a guy on the phone. I told him I'd be right back. I thought I'd put him on mute. Turns out he heard everything as I took the biggest dump I've ever taken. We haven't talked since. FML

#15689695
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11436) - you deserved it (29646)

On 04/08/2011 at 1:31am - love - by Payte -

Today, my girlfriend hid my car keys and decided that she wouldn't give them back until I succeeded in giving her an orgasm. FML

#15689615
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13604) - you deserved it (58582)

On 04/08/2011 at 1:24am - intimacy - by failure -

Today, I was at a local talent show and during a piano performance I had to go to the bathroom. I sang along in the bathroom but was unaware how loud I was until I walked out and everyone started applauding me while the pianist was still playing. FML

#15661071
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7543) - you deserved it (23501)

On 04/06/2011 at 2:19am - misc - by American idol -

Today, I was prescribed anti-anxiety medication due to the high level of stress that I experience at my job. Unfortunately, I cannot afford the medication because I do not make enough money at said job. FML

#15658999
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24961) - you deserved it (2966)

On 04/05/2011 at 11:26pm - money - by Username -

Today, I told my mother I have a girlfriend. Her first answer was "Does she know?" FML

#15655514
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30893) - you deserved it (3734)

On 04/05/2011 at 8:00pm - misc - by notacreeper -



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