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Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

#15855605
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15721) - you deserved it (21465)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:10am - work - by bham boy -

Today, I told my son that his grades are dropping and his behavior is getting out of hand. To which he replied, "Yeah, so is your weight." FML

#15843459
330 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31194) - you deserved it (11844)

On 04/19/2011 at 2:38am - kids - by randa -

Today, my family and I discovered that my sleepwalking has escalated into sleep-raiding-the-fridge, after I woke up on my kitchen floor in a puddle of melted ice cream, surrounded by my parents, brother, and dogs. Apparently my recent dieting plans aren't going over too well with my subconscious. FML

#15842272
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23253) - you deserved it (2892)

On 04/19/2011 at 12:30am - health - by norestforthewicked -

Today, I watched Free Willy with my daughter. Later on she decided to free her 6 pet mice into the house. FML

#15838713
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22172) - you deserved it (5984)

On 04/18/2011 at 8:48pm - kids - by Jukka -

Today, I was fired from my job. Apparently getting shot is no valid reason to stay home. FML

#15833093
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50597) - you deserved it (3441)

On 04/18/2011 at 11:09am - work - by davka -

Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's house. I had a shower while he went downstairs. As I went to say goodbye to him, his mother muttered "slut" while pouring him orange juice. FML

#15831964
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31495) - you deserved it (16254)

On 04/18/2011 at 5:34am - intimacy - by sllaggy -

Today, my boyfriend punched a hole in a door. This is on top of the broken handle, cracked sink top, dented fridge, and other holes in the wall he has also made. We are 4 months into our year lease. I don't think we are getting our $720 deposit back. FML

#15781081
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18599) - you deserved it (15262)

On 04/14/2011 at 2:59am - money - by Username -

Today, I ran a red light in front of a cop and got pulled over. My friend thought it would be funny to throw a knife in my lap and scream "Help me officer, he has a knife!" FML

#15773415
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37834) - you deserved it (5076)

On 04/13/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by FrOsTy25 -

Today, I got attacked by my own dog. I don't know what will be harder, telling everyone how my dog thought I was a robber or explaining to them why a 25 year old man owns a poodle. FML

#15766373
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17474) - you deserved it (11464)

On 04/13/2011 at 3:05am - animals - by Username -

Today, I watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes, thinking "wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized that I'd been watching my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes. FML

#15762337
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14168) - you deserved it (27353)

On 04/12/2011 at 10:20pm - animals - by Anonymous -

Today, while at an important meeting at work, I got to watch helplessly as a police officer gave me a parking meter ticket. Added to that my boss chewed me out for "never paying attention and staring out the window during meetings". FML

#15756717
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16297) - you deserved it (9116)

On 04/12/2011 at 3:25pm - work - by Kevin -

Today, I wore a Stanford college T-shirt to school. My Spanish teacher took one look at it and said "You wish". FML

#15752266
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27633) - you deserved it (6064)

On 04/12/2011 at 6:09am - misc - by anon -

Today, I broke up with my now ex-girlfriend for the 5th time. She still hasn't got the hint. FML

#15749336
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27995) - you deserved it (9130)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:08am - love - by husks -



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