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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my girlfriend made me watch six hours of "Glee" with her. I don't know what I hate the most, the fact that I actually sat there and watched it or that I'm angry at Finn for breaking up with Rachel. FML

#16301661
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19485) - you deserved it (32915)

On 05/22/2011 at 7:09pm - misc - by why me -

Today, I got motion sickness while having sex. FML

#16265516
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39005) - you deserved it (6282)

On 05/20/2011 at 10:39am - intimacy - by mikeycoco -

Today, while driving, a minivan cut me off. Pissed, I started honking and cursing. I then went ballistic when the driver waved out the window, smiling. It wasn't until I was at a stoplight that I noticed their "Honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker. FML

#16263941
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26500) - you deserved it (14162)

On 05/20/2011 at 6:07am - misc - by Max Flynn -

Today, I tore up my airborne academy admission documents because my lab results weren't good enough. A few hours later, they called me to apologize for the misunderstanding, mine turned out to be perfect and they'd accepted me. They need me tomorrow with all the documents to finalize the admission. FML

#16263514
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15278) - you deserved it (37109)

On 05/20/2011 at 3:46am - work - by SkyDiver -

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years broke up with me. Ten minutes after, he called me asking how to change his relationship status on facebook. FML

#16262693
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42074) - you deserved it (3304)

On 05/20/2011 at 1:46am - love - by BALEIGHLOVE17 -

Today, I made it my life goal to own a towel heater. FML

#16262012
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8768) - you deserved it (23916)

On 05/20/2011 at 12:43am - misc - by Ahlph -

Today, I'm the coach of a football team. To celebrate winning a game, they poured a cooler of blue Gatorade over my head. This would've been great, if not for the fact that I'm highly allergic to blue food dye. FML

#16256468
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35906) - you deserved it (3024)

On 05/19/2011 at 7:32pm - health - by blue. -

Today, I finally started my dream job. I turned up for work with a huge smile on my face. Imagine how much my face dropped when I saw that I had to share an office with the girl I stood up last weekend. FML

#16251176
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9792) - you deserved it (72366)

On 05/19/2011 at 11:13am - work - by Username -

Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time". He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML

#16248002
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11284) - you deserved it (63367)

On 05/19/2011 at 1:30am - work - by 613tanner -

Today, I offered to drive my girlfriend's grandpa to the doctor. I thus learned my girlfriend's grandfather has a colostomy bag when it burst all over the inside of my truck. FML

#16247260
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32199) - you deserved it (2851)

On 05/19/2011 at 12:27am - misc - by John -

Today, at work, somebody stole my sunglasses. Fed up with the constant theft in my office, I stormed up to my boss, as he had long ago promised to catch the thief. He listened patiently to my rant before pointing out that my sunglasses were on my head. FML

#16235775
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10234) - you deserved it (41812)

On 05/18/2011 at 9:08am - work - by Red-cheeked -

Today, my boyfriend of nearly 4 years, with whom I have a baby, broke up with me. His reason? His best friend said he didn't like drinking with guys who were "tied down". FML

#16232451
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38948) - you deserved it (5619)

On 05/18/2011 at 12:13am - love - by me -

Today, I threw a surprise birthday party for my 3 year old. There was music, snacks and lots of toys. My 3 year old is a cat. FML

#16231154
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13609) - you deserved it (46110)

On 05/17/2011 at 11:04pm - animals - by kaileigh10 -



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