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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He decided that the best time would be while I was giving him a blowjob. He then seemed confused as to why I didn't finish. FML

#20114701
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36825) - you deserved it (3483)

On 10/13/2012 at 8:04am - intimacy - by notthebesttime -

Today, I saw a shady looking person on the street. As I walked past him, he said, "Hey, come here." Thinking he needed something, I went over. He handed me several pictures of my wife, in public and at home. I've never seen this man before in my life. FML

#20089025
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31988) - you deserved it (1837)

On 09/26/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by ahappypenguin -

Today, I went to a theme park. The first ride I went on broke down just as my cart reached the highest point. I had a nice view of my loving family laughing at me while management failed to fix the rollercoaster. FML

#20061769
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22197) - you deserved it (1781)

On 09/07/2012 at 11:33am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, it's day two of my two-month summer job on a Mediterranean cruise ship. I'm incredibly seasick, and the ship is still docked. FML

#20060408
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20380) - you deserved it (4350)

On 09/06/2012 at 12:51pm - work - by SummerJob (woman) -

Today, I finally confronted my boyfriend and asked him if he was cheating on me. He got flustered and said, "Technically, I'm cheating with you, not on you." FML

#20049344
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34100) - you deserved it (2778)

On 08/30/2012 at 11:24am - love - by nice one (woman) -

Today, my boyfriend bought us three kittens. Today, I also discovered that I am allergic to cats. My boyfriend broke up with me because he wanted the cats more than me. FML

#19978761
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30099) - you deserved it (4021)

On 07/23/2012 at 12:31am - animals - by Lola -

Today, I was swimming in my pool with my two sons. A few hours later while on Facebook, I saw that one of them had liked a photo with the caption, "Peeing in a pool, best feeling ever." FML

#19978741
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21619) - you deserved it (2463)

On 07/23/2012 at 12:28am - kids - by poolboy -

Today, my neighbor called me on vacation to tell me that she let my mother into my house to feed my fish. I don't have fish, and my mother passed away 3 years ago. FML

#19978365
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34609) - you deserved it (2351)

On 07/22/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by My_Name_Is_Zach -

Today, I told my boyfriend that I didn't want to go out with him because I was having a fat day. After ten minutes of fighting, he threw a ring box on the floor and stormed out. I basically refused his proposal because of my body issues. FML

#19977285
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10358) - you deserved it (66052)

On 07/22/2012 at 9:33pm - love - by henley -

Today, I got to live my life's dream of going whale watching. Apparently my true life's dream was to get extremely seasick, sunburned to a crisp, and pay $60 to see only seagulls in the end. FML

#19977133
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20834) - you deserved it (3920)

On 07/22/2012 at 9:05pm - animals - by disappointed (woman) -

Today, I started a sport journalism degree. I was the only female out of 60 students. The lecturer started talking about how we should all aspire to become sports editors of national newspapers. Later, he said women have no chance of ever becoming sports editors. FML

#19894898
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26901) - you deserved it (2871)

On 07/05/2012 at 11:46am - work - by Anonymous -

Today, I bought a home at a bargain. It will need 5 grand in repairs to fix plumbing and electric, but it's mine. When I pulled up the listing to show pictures to my friends, there was a new listing that was in the same neighborhood, and a larger, nicer house that is move in ready. Same price. FML

#19892376
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26438) - you deserved it (5372)

On 07/04/2012 at 8:50pm - money - by jenjam (woman) -

Today, I had my end of year physics exam. I wasn't sure about some stuff, so I hid my notes and textbook in the bathroom. Halfway through, I got up, went to the bathroom, and as soon as I picked up the book, forgot what I was looking for. I can't even cheat right. FML

#19879559
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7016) - you deserved it (50150)

On 07/02/2012 at 3:23am - misc - by Anonymous -



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