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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, a little girl I give horse-riding lessons to told me she had saved up $8.00 for her own pony. I laughed and thought how cute she was, then realized that was more than I have in my own savings account. FML

#19054787
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20972) - you deserved it (8326)

On 02/12/2012 at 4:43am - money - by IHateBeingAStudent (woman) -

Today, I was at a choir convention, and everyone sings the national anthem outside their rooms each night. I was not informed and took a shower. My roommates opened the door, yanked me out, and locked me out of the room to sing wearing just a towel. The guy down the hall was video taping it. FML

#19054485
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19719) - you deserved it (3514)

On 02/12/2012 at 3:07am - misc - by TowelSinger (woman) -

Today, I had a debate with my girlfriend about whether giving birth or getting kicked in the balls hurts more. It ended up with her kicking me in the balls. I was the one who said giving birth hurt more. FML

#19053808
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26238) - you deserved it (5306)

On 02/12/2012 at 1:17am - love - by OwMyBalls (man) -

Today, I came home to a homeless man sleeping in my living room. It turns out he thought my house was abandoned due to its disheveled appearance, and decided to break in. FML

#19029338
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16401) - you deserved it (7034)

On 02/08/2012 at 8:20pm - misc - by pauper (man) -

Today, I finally got up the courage to tell my boyfriend of a year and a half that I love him. His response was to start to snore, pretending to be asleep. FML

#19028650
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20835) - you deserved it (3111)

On 02/08/2012 at 7:07pm - love - by c -

Today, I was sick, so I emailed my co-workers with a list of my hours, asking if anyone would be willing to cover them for me. I only got one hour covered, and that was during a day I don't even work. FML

#19026476
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15373) - you deserved it (1955)

On 02/08/2012 at 1:46pm - work - by Girl With a Cold (woman) -

Today, we got a new seating arrangement in my science class. I'm now sitting between two people who have spent the last 20 minutes whispering dirty things to one another. FML

#19026330
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23390) - you deserved it (2088)

On 02/08/2012 at 1:15pm - love - by Anonymous -

Today, I was attacked by a bird at 3 in the morning. The bird was being attacked by an owl, and decided the safest place to land wasn't in a tree, but my face. No-one will believe me, despite the 12 stitches across my face. FML

#19026198
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21504) - you deserved it (1723)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:45pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I sneaked off work early. As I was in the elevator on the way down to leave, it stopped at my boss's floor, and he got in. FML

#19025200
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5435) - you deserved it (36181)

On 02/08/2012 at 8:26am - work - by ronz -

Today, I caught my boyfriend trying on my bra. He still has no excuse. FML

#19023542
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22362) - you deserved it (3420)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I had to give my husband a tutorial on how to use jumper cables. Confused and flustered, he requested written instructions. FML

#18975500
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17984) - you deserved it (2928)

On 02/02/2012 at 9:50am - misc - by MM (woman) -

Today, my son sprayed our white couch with Febreze. This would have been great, were the "Febreze" not actually black spray paint. FML

#18969036
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23621) - you deserved it (3345)

On 02/01/2012 at 2:35pm - kids - by Anonymous -

Today, I came home to a furious wife and an answering machine message from a woman neither of us know claiming I got her pregnant. My wife won't believe she got the wrong number. FML

#18932189
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31965) - you deserved it (2491)

On 01/28/2012 at 8:40am - intimacy - by Innocent (man) -



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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