Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Blog main page | RSS feed | All posts

Illustrated FML (268) - About FMyLife (36) - Videos (34) - Ramblings (14) - Books (9) - Competitions (6) - Special guests (6)

Parenting FML

How can we start this article? We already talked about cops, candies, not-so-well-placed piercings, what does today's illustration feature besides immature parents? Oh, we got it: immature parents! Have you ever caught your parents doing something so childish you wanted… you needed to punish them? It could be a lot of things unfortunately, seeing them vacuously fighting, hearing one of them singing The Mamas and Papas in your yard, teaching them for the millionth time how to start their computers… sometimes it's obnoxious to see them grow even more childish with a total disregard for the continual appearance of wrinkles, while we get older. Benjamin Button style. And to talk about this strange phenomenon, we now introduce our artist of the day, please, everybody welcome Evan Diaz!

Evan is 22, he lives near Houston in Texas with his wife Janette. He works as a 3D artist and animator at a production studio in downtown Houston, where he spends his day working on special effects on blue screens, as well as a lot of fancy 3D things.Plus, Evan is currently illustrating a childrens' book series and is a member of the web comic collective The Noir Project Press, where you'll find great artists creating great comics. Yeah, that's cool

Evan went to school near Orlando, Florida, where he graduated with a degree in 3D animation a few years back. After doing some freelance VFX (side note: visual effects) work, he was quickly hired as an animator at the company he is currently working for. Earlier this year, he finally took the first steps toward his dream of being a bonafide cartoonist when he launched his web comic in March called Pajama Forest.
He originally created it as a run of the mill text blog (which you can still find somewhere on the internet if you look hard enough), but he started to draw comics with it and enjoyed it so much, he focused more and more on that aspect, and eventually the web comic was born.

"-Okay Evan, here are our last questions before we let you go back to playing WoW, why did you choose this FML story?
-It was short and sweet, and I really liked the idea of a middle aged man having such an awful day that he *needed* candy so terribly bad that he would resort to stealing it (that's how I imagined the story playing out anyway..)
- And why did you decided to send an illustration for FML?
-My pal Philippa Rice did one recently and inspired me to do one as well !"


Well, actually it inspired our artist to do four of them, as the first tests weren't conclusive, and he needed (and wanted!) to draw a fresh new one that worked!


click this preview!

And it does! Thank you Evan for your participation... mmmmh candies...


Evan's blog is this way:
The Noir project is this way:


And now here's a little instruction manual on how to be our next published artist: send an email to which starts with a hello and ends with a goodbye, including your name, age, and a link to your website/blog. If you don't have one, attach some of your drawings. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with our lovely Alice who will tell you what you have to do!

#228 - Illustrated FML - On 10/16/2009 at 3:35pm by FML Team - 12 comments

FML won't stop until it hits the spot

OH GOD YES, DON'T STOP reading this article, it's not because it's short that it's not good, the most important thing being of course the taste. And today we have a new kind of flavor, a mix a between maple syrup, elk and snow, because we're visiting a Northern artist. No, not Kansas, a little bit more in the North. Not Hannah Montana either, again, a little bit more in the North. Exactly, we're crossing the border to visit Canada for the first time! It's kind of surprising to see that Canadian people are not like South Park describes them, but we're still okay. Even though we're feeling a little cold. Luckily, today's artist opened her doors to welcome us in. We're also welcoming her on FML though, so it’s a perfect arrangement. Please, everybody, welcome Jessa Rempel!

Jessa is 16 years old, and not only is she our youngest ever participant, but she's our first Canadian artist too! It's in Vancouver that she's spending her last year in high school before she enters the wild world of capitalism, unemployment and under-the-desk professional training. Hopefully, she'll reach her dream, which is to work in animation. Passionate about art, she started by drawing actual objects when she was just a little kid. Our little maple syrup is slowly but surely making her place in the DA community. She doesn't own a web comic, but her humor is great enough to make us want to have her in the illustration section!

You're right, Jessa is a little bit young to have a biography as long as Berlusconi's nose, that's why we'll keep it short, displaying her simple but effective drawings, and repeating that she's on her way to be a web comic star… wait and see, my friends!

Time to say goodbye to Jessa, Pamela Anderson, Celine Dion and Keanu Reeves, but before here are our last questions: why did our today's artist choose this story and why did she choose to participate in FML?

"I always come across strange people like the Fat Lady, and I LOVE drawing creepy expressions. Character design is always great too; I have a lot of fun with things like this. As soon as I found out about FML I fell in love, and when the comic section appeared I fainted. How could something so great get so much better?”

click on this preview !


Actually we don't know, it's kind of a miracle... Vanity besides, we thank you Jessa for your orgasmic illustration and we would like to thank Becky who colorize it !


Jessa's DA is here:


And now here's a little instruction manual on how to be our next published artist: send an email to which starts with a hello and ends with a goodbye, including your name, age, and a link to your website/blog. If you don't have one, attach some of your drawings.

#222 - Illustrated FML - On 10/09/2009 at 7:34am by FML Team - 12 comments

My cardboard FML

Hello everybody! We hope that you had a great week and that you're all ready for today's new illustration. As some of you may have noticed, yesterday we received Kevin Nealon who helped us select his favorite FML stories of the day. As the illustration section is also a huge fan of his, we didn't content ourselves with having just an artist today, we actually wanted to make distinguished jokes that we could put in our one-crew-show, if we had one. Of course, we weren't able to do it ourselves, that why we're welcoming with a great pleasure or host for today, Philippa Rice!

Philippa is 23, and for the first time, we crossed the Atlantic Ocean to find an artist living in North London, United Kingdom. It makes us want a cup of Hugh Grant and a tea autograph, or the other way around, either way is fine. She did A-levels in art and design at school, even if she was encouraged to do a degree in fine art, our artist of the day decided to go for Animation instead, because it seemed like more fun. At the moment, Philippa is between jobs. Since graduating in 2007, she has worked in a few different short term and part time jobs. She hasn't tried to get a job in animation because she wanted to carry on with that on her own rather than animating someone else's characters. As she says, it's a difficult time for employment at the moment, so instead of trying too hard to find a full time job, she has been creating work for herself with freelance illustration, and selling her comic books online and at craft fairs. And we can do nothing but encourage her, because her productions are amazing.

My Cardboard Life started almost a year ago now. It's a webcomic updated on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. It's made out of actual cardboard and paper which she cuts out with her own cute little hands. You may ask yourself whether it's expensive to make. Actually we did too, but Philippa assures us that it's not. All the cardboard is recycled from old packaging; a lot of the paper is also recycled scrap paper. But she does buy a lot of glue however.

Originally, the idea was to create a children's picture book about recycling. Philippa moved into a new home, and had all this cardboard around from flat-pack furniture. She came up with the character Cardboard Colin and some other characters like Plastic Pete, Tin Tim, Paper Pauline etc... She never finished the picture book and she left the idea alone for several months before she decided to give Cardboard Colin another chance and make him into a webcomic. Cardboard Colin and Paper Pauline were the only characters to stay on board; even the recycling theme was dropped. My Cardboard Life is mainly about the friendship between Colin and Pauline now: Colin is naive and a bit childish, and Pauline takes advantage of this and is often cruel to him. But you know it’s like Wilson and House, we can wonder if love is not behind all this…

By visiting her blog, we discovered that MCL was one project amongst many others. Not only Philippa can handle an entirely hand-made webcomic (as does Becky that we met last week) but she also does illustrations, postcards, posters and even plush!
 “I learnt to crochet about six months ago, and my house is riddled with plush toys that I keep making. My Boyfriend complains every time I make a new one, but then he doesn't like it when I sell them either because he gets attached."
Another thing Philippa has been working on is a series of art-zines called Intricate Dwellings, which are made up of detailed drawings of landscapes, where Philippa hides little items for people to find, like the latest level of Waldo, except that Intricate Dwellings is harder and cuter.


“-Why did you choose this FML Philippa?
-I liked the fact that it was a bit mysterious. What was the ex-girlfriend so cross about? Did he deserve it or not, and what was the actual damage caused? Also, it gave me the opportunity to buy a bag of peanuts and eat most of them.
-Did you eat the bat too? Mh never mind, last question, why did you decide to send an illustration for FML?
-The FML stories are so addictive to read. I especially like the embarrassing ones. Cardboard Colin has a lot of FML moments too. I guess I must be a fan of misery and misfortune.”


At least your illustration is not made of misery! Thank you Philippa for your contribution, we'll send you all of our cardboard so you can continue your amazing job for the next few years!

My Cardboard Life webcomic is here:

Philippa’s blog where you’ll find other things that she’s doing (including a shop corner! Go crazy!):


And now here's a little instruction manual on how to be our next published artist: send an email to which starts with a hello and ends with a goodbye, including your name, age, and a link to your website/blog. If you don't have one, attach some of your drawings.

#218 - Illustrated FML - On 10/01/2009 at 5:26pm by FML Team - 11 comments

Today, it's Kevin Nealon's day!

Kevin Nealon is a talented actor and stand up comedian, on our TV and cinema screens. He's also a really nice guy. To prove this, he was willing to answer some of FML's dumbest questions. He also helped out by selecting a few of the stories that will be published today. Enjoy!

We love you as Doug Wilson on the show Weeds. Has this popularity helped you to gain easier access to the best restaurants or police stations?  
KN: I wish. Actually, it only gets me easier access to hemp stores.

You were a longtime member of the animal rights movement. Which animal is the best kisser?
KN: Definitely not a cat. Their sandpaper-like tongues will take half of your face off. Not a horse either. That's like getting pounded in the face with a wet log. I'd have to say the best kisser is probably your run of the mill shelter dog. They are very appreciative of your company.

You graduated from St. Joseph High School in 1971. Was there a jazz band playing at the prom?
KN: I don't know. I didn't go to my prom. Like always, I had waited to the last minute to ask someone and by then they were all taken (at least that's what they said).

You were part of Saturday Night Live. You have a great experience of comedy, thus of life. What message would you like to send to your children?
KN: Eat, TiVo, play.

What would you like to say to your other children?
KN: "I'm sorry. It was a one night stand. Your mother never told me about you!"

Your new DVD "Now Hear Me Out" will be released shortly. If we tell you that we love your work, that you're one of the coolest stand-ups in the world, can we have a free DVD for the FML Team? (you don't have to answer the question, it's just plugging your DVD - just send us the DVD anyway)
KN: It's in the mail.

You've been a vegetarian for 18 years. Isn't that a bit of a long time?  
KN: Hopefully, it will be considered a short time in respect to how long I actually live.

You're the son of Kathleen, a homemaker, and Emmett Nealon, an aircraft company executive. Can you still get cheaper plane tickets?
KN: I can only get cheaper tickets to see 'Jefferson Starship' in concert.

You've only been married twice. What flaws must a woman have to attract you?
KN: She must be legally blind, forgetful and have a poor grasp of the English language.

The stupidest word in Love, is it "thanks", "more-more" or "yes-yes"?
KN: None of those. The stupidest word in love is "How much??"

Would you be more ashamed that your best friend saw on your bedside table: a Dan Brown book, or a blow up doll?
KN: I would be most embarrassed if my best friend found a blow up doll of Dan Brown.

It is said 'A good name is better than riches'. Then why did your folks call you Kevin?  
KN: My folks actually call me Rich. I came up with the name Kevin.

Can comedy come from tragedy? Erm, no... forget that question. Have you, like some of your colleagues, thought about stealing standup routine ideas from the stories?
KN: I haven't, but that's not a bad idea.

Which sin tempts you the most?
KN: Killing you.

What's the last question that no one should ever ask you?
KN: "Which sin tempts you the most?"

#212 - Special guests - On 09/28/2009 at 9:43am by The FML team - 35 comments

FML's bringing cuties back

Hey there kitty kitty kitty, how’s our favorite little pets doing today? We hope your master took you out for a walk earlier in the morning, because now it's time to rest your little paws, so you can fully enjoy today's illustration. A lot of our little friends are here to commemorate this weekly celebration. Hello Kitty is right behind us, finishing her milk, and sending her 1'000'000th customized pencil, Beethoven and Lassie are on tenterhooks, waiting for us to present today's artist (and also expecting an addition to their family very soon, so congratulations to them about that) and Eddie McDowd is still searching for 24 good deeds to do before the wizard will let him go flirt with teenage girls again. And you are here, that's the most important thing. Ladies, gentleman, puppies, please welcome our artist of the day:  Becky Dreistadt !

Becky was born 23 years ago in Williamsburg, Virginia. She graduated from the Savannah College of Art & Design's Sequential Art (Comics) department in 2008. She was kind of lost on what she could do with all of her free time. But then, she met Frank, and something amazing happened, not only did she fall in love but she also made a big decision and so she finally majored in comics rather than animation. When she graduated, she moved down to Auckland, New Zealand to work on comics with Frank, but the idea of moving back to Los Angeles in a few years time could be on the cards.

Our comic artist and illustrator’s main project is Tiny Kitten Teeth, a 3 to 5 times a weekly updated web comic, created in early 2009 after brainstorming with her partner Frank. They did a gag comic together, they liked it, but it didn't really give either of them a chance to be as creative as they wanted to be. Willing to give the best of themselves, they had another brainstorming session, and their new web comic was born within the hour. It's even more impressive that TKT is entirely painted in gouache. Making a made-of-gouache webcomic does not only take time and hard to put together, it's also pretty expensive, that's why here at FML, we are pretty impressed (and proud!) to welcome Becky.

Guess what, Becky loves animals! All the kinds of pets that you can imagine: rabbits, cats, dogs, birds and specially chickens. She like them both alive and cooked as teriyaki, or scrambled eggs. "I feel hypocritical!" she confesses. Besides the usual pleasures like live music and having great and weird adventures, Becky can't stop herself from liking more and more animals, that's why going to the zoo is one of her biggest hobbies.

"-Time to say goodbye Becky, but before we let you go to your enchanting little word full of little animals that we would love to live in, we would like to know why you chose to participate in the FML illustrations and why did you choose this particular story?
-FML is a really fun blog, I can relate quite a lot to the sentiment behind it. Also the freedom of being able to twist and change someone's story was really fun."


Your illustration is funny indeed AND it's cute, thank you Becky! Ooooooow kitties...


"Tiny kitten teeth" is this way:
Becky's DA is here:


And now here's a little instruction manual on how to be our next published artist: send an email to which starts with a hello and ends with a goodbye, including your name, age, and a link to your website/blog. If you don't have one, attach some of your drawings.

#211 - Illustrated FML - On 09/25/2009 at 5:45am by FML Team - 10 comments

Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: