The marvelous comedian Frankie Boyle reckons that "having a pet is basically just saying, 'I have tried to find love among my own species; I have f**king failed'". Some of us (well, most of us actually) here at FML have cats, so yes, we have failed then in that respect. Some more than others, but we won’t name any names. Pets can however be a source of comfort; they’ll chew on your broom to amuse you and take your mind off the fact that the weather is shitty. Pets can also be a source of stress, especially if you have a cat that manages to learn overnight how to open doors, and you have an oddball neighbor who has a copy of your keys in case of emergencies (note to self: change the locks again). Here’s a new video all about pets; not so much a case of “Pets do the craziest things”, more along the lines of “People let their pets turn them into total basket-cases because they are evil bundles of fur.” Have fun, and be excellent to your furry friends.
Hello everybody! You've been waiting for this all week and here it is, the traditional illustrated FML. It's actually been four years since we started to illustrate your day-to-day crap. Time goes by so quickly! Anyway, this definitely means we're planning a big surprise. But don't be in such a hurry, June will be here soon enough.
There. I've teased you quite a bit and I'm not saying anything more about that special month, nope, not even... no I definitely can't say. Right now, we're welcoming April's final artist. Let the interview BEGIN!
-What is your name, surname and nickname?
-My name is Christopher Williams, but I mainly just go by Chris. I didn't choose this nickname, it chose me.
-How old are you?
-As of this writing I am 31.
-Where do you live?
-I live in Frederick, Maryland in the US.
-What's your job?
-I work as a facility technician at sewage treatment plant (I swear I am not making this up). It's a crappy job, but it pays the bills. I guess you could say that making a webcomic is my part time job.
-What's your journey?
-Other than just trying to be a good father and husband, my journey is to ultimately break out of my current career and into a more creativity-driven career. One of the reasons I started my journal comic is because I felt like it was something that I could show to my kid when he was older, and be able to prove to him that he can do anything if he works hard enough.
-What are your inspirations?
-My wife and son are constant inspirations to me, I mean heck, without them, I wouldn't have a comic! Hah. I'm also constantly inspired by my friends and colleagues in the comics world by how hard they work and their individual creativity, which only makes me want to work that much harder to constantly get better.
-Do you read webcomics? If so, which ones?
-Oh geez, I read waaaaaay too many. A few off the top of my head are Little Guardians, The Ouro Bros, Ghostbucket, Out of my Element, and I am ARG!. The list goes on and on but I could be here typing forever at this rate.
-Tell us more about your website Christophercomic.com.
-My website is my journal comic that I cleverly named after myself: Christopher which can be found at http://www.christophercomic.com. I started it because my wife and I had gotten pregnant, and I couldn't think of any better way to announce to our friends and the rest of the world than with a comic. As time went on, I found it was a good way to document things happening in my son's life, sort of like a really overly ambitious baby book. It's also been a constant way for me to relieve stress, and help me deal with an abusive childhood (I had made a series of strips that reflect on that period of time in my life that I called "Memory Lane") better than I was ever able to before.
As for the things I have for sale, I have a full on book for sale that contains the first 250ish strips of my journal comic, buttons, and an eBook! I've got a couple other new comic/illustration projects going on as well and hope that they see the light sooner than later. And of course you can purchase them through my website!
-How do you work?
-I work almost 100% digital these days, unless I happen to be at work where I usually keep a small sketchbook with me for quick doodles. In a nutshell, my process starts off with writing/scripting, then panel layouts, sketching, to penciling, then inking, then colors and lettering. The whole process can take up to 6 hours per strip depending on how involved I'm getting with it or how much I hate what I'm drawing and have to start all over.
-And last but not least Chris, why did you choose this FML story?
-I chose this one just because kids are so unintentionally hilarious, even if they're being little turds!
Hormones, like booze, will throw humans at each other. It's a scientific fact. The "beer goggles" is the name of the phenomenon where the ingestion of alcohol makes a 3 seem like an 8, and the next morning you wake up and wonder whose bedroom you are in, who that person is next to you in bed, and where the hell you parked your car (and underwear for that matter). Once you've got your brain in gear and had a coffee, you vow to stop hooking up with just any old guy/gal that you can get your greasy hands on. Then, a few days later, you do it all over again. This video shows you just what sort of thing can happen if you're not too careful. It's fun to do alright, especially if deep down you're lonely and start listening to your hormones a little too intently... but watch your step, it's bad for your health in the long run. Just use protection if you're going to mess around, eh? Anyway, check out the FML video guys!
Never mind. I'll tell you about the artist of the week instead. He's 21, comes from Annemasse, "the capitol of the world", and is called Paul Lannes AKA Polinko.
What does he do? "I get up in the morning, I eat cornflakes, I go to school, then I spend the day drawing on bits of paper and sometimes, I'll converse with people and think about serious stuff like: "Hasn't that man got a long arm?", "Should I have hanged that bit of paper a bit higher?" or "Who is more badass, Sangoku or Marcel Duchamp?", all the while placing clever words like "post-modernism" or "vernacular", it makes me look smart. And at the weekend, I guard things in a museum to pay for my cornflakes."
Paul explains that what's cool about drawing is that for him it's the best way, for him, to open up holes in reality and get bits of wood to talk to strange little men, amongst mystical mountains. "Because, reality, when you have to fill out paperwork to pay electricity bills, is often very boring. And what I'm missing are ripped muscles, superpowers and manga hero's charisma. I'd like to be able to talk in punch lines as well. That must be classy."
His latest new? "I get up in the morning, I eat cornflakes, I… Oh, already said all that. Erm, well, I'm on FML."
Paul's road isn't over, but he explains how he got here: "For me, life started at primary school, the time and place I became the coolest guy in the world. I lived in a tiny village in the mountains where cultural activities were pretty slow. And then I became the first to discover, and introduce the playground to Pokémon and Harry Potter. No need to tell you the social standing that sort of thing brings. After that, middle school, adolescence, mangas (a lot less classy in society at that time of life of course), high school, art school prep, then HEAD in Geneva, visual arts section. And now I'm preparing to attempt some other school entry exams to further myself. Wish me luck or I'll beat you up."
If I was you, I'd wish him luck in the comments; it's best not to annoy our Polinko. Any projects? "Make the most of life and sleep, sometimes. Ah, and have a Pokédex full of Red Pokémon as well (there are things that never go away)."
We can imagine. Right, next bit.
Cats or dogs?
A dog is an idiots, so it's cool. A cat is a proud creature so it's cool too. I need a hybrid.
What are the latest things you liked in movies, music, books and comics?
The last movie I saw was Django Unchained, so no need to go on about this masterpiece. The soundtrack is great, too, but I've been listening a lot to Devendra Banhart's new album, Mala and Temperamental by Don Cavalli. I've enjoyed reading the interviews with Joann Sfar by Thierry Groensteen. The last comic to make me tremble due to narrative success and imagery (which happens a lot) must've been Diary of a Ghost by Nicolas de Crécy.
Who are the main artists you like and whose blogs you check out?
In no particular order: Niv Bavarsky, Nylso, Helkarava, Yoann Sacré, Diego Ybarra, Zéphir, Tarmasz, Corpus Caca, Julien Dinkel, Hugo Ruyant, Manu Larcenet, Mégaboy, Adrien Fricheteau, Thomas Rouzière, Mayumi Otero, Renart, Sacré Walt, and Nicolas André.
All good people!
Tell us what you like in life, your passions, pastimes, vices and everyday pleasures.
The thing that gives me the most pleasure, the most emotions, that keeps me warm during the winter nights and the keeps me cool when summer is dry is in one word: drawing.
Hahaha! No, I'm joking, if I'm drawing now, it's only because my parents forced me, with a whip, at a very young age so I'd have something to bring the bacon home with. It was either that or opera singing; the choice was made pretty quickly.
Tell us a bad joke. Possible joke: if you don't have a joke, tell us your biggest FML.
I'm going to tell you a little number that was told to me by a master, a which sets fire to every gathering I'm invited to: "Did you hear about the guy whose head was so big, he wore two hats!" Admit it, you're laughing!
To finish up, ask yourself a question that you would've liked to have been asked, and then answer it if you want.
The scene happens before my eyes with the realism of an HD TV: a charming young lady opens the conversation and asks me: "Paul, you being so intelligent, do you know what cuniculture is? It's been keeping me up at nights just thinking about it!" And me, sampling replying: "You know, sweet flower (I'm a romantic) my culture is overflowing with knowledge and I'll know move you into the light, away from the darkness of ignorance by telling you that cuniculture is… rabbit breeding!"
If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DeviantArt. But DON'T send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with me, and I'll tell you what you have to do!
Communicating via text message is a major pain in the backside. Mistakes, misunderstandings, and miscommunications are rife whenever texting is involved. Many have fallen by the wayside due to a misjudged SMS, and receiving one can be akin to being sent a digital grenade. One small push of a button and your already dwindling reputation can be reduced to smoldering wreckage quicker than you can say "LOL WUT?" You may sit there and think that it's never going to happen to you, but it can, and it will. Watch this and see what'll happen to your chops then.