Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Blog main page | RSS feed | All posts

Illustrated FML (244) - Videos (34) - About FMyLife (32) - Ramblings (10) - Books (9) - Competitions (6) - Special guests (6)

FML's break-ups

We’ve all broken up with someone, at one point in time. Life is like that, it all ends badly; it’s not being pessimistic, it’s being a miserable sourpuss. As the old saying goes, there’s plenty more fish in the sea. Except there isn’t, due to deregulated fishing practices in international waters. FML

Now that St Valentine’s Day is over and that everyone has eaten their flowers and put their chocolates into vases, it's time for some spring-cleaning. Dump each other and then come at me bro; FML will be happy to share your story. Watch these, and try and do worse.

Directed by: Logan Burdick
Starring: Ben Giroux and Ray Chase
Guest Starring: Kelly Huddleston, Emily Goss, and Scott Burman
1st AC / Gaffer: Alex Darke
Grip: Matthew Little
Location Supervisor: Aaron Ehberhart
Art Department: Karissa Barney
PA: Elissa Weinzimmer
Edited by: Logan Burdick
Post production: Noside Production
Sound Design: Gizmo Deluxe
Sound Engineer: S Joly /  JL Fauvel
Creative Director: Didier Guedj
Special thanks to Morgan Prêleur and Steve Maisel.

#1354 - Videos - On 02/18/2013 at 4:09am by The FML Team - 33 comments

M.Roda's Illustrated FML

Hi gang! It’s Saturday, and Saturday is illustrated FML day! We hope that everyone had a great week, that you had some lasagna, wrote the Pope a goodbye note, escaped the Russian meteorite and that you got some sleep.

This week’s artist seems to be doing OK. He goes by the nickname M.Roda. He’s 30 and has several websites: Selective Memory, a blog where he puts his illustrations and comics (“There’s colors and sometimes it hurts your eyes.”) BD + RAP, a blog where he illustrates rap tracks (“It’s in black and white, so it’s a bit more serious.”) and his ultra book to check out his best stuff.

What does he do? “I teach plastic arts. I also illustrate and create comics with my association Nekomix. But soon I’ll be quitting all this stuff to become a successful singer. I’ve already done two concerts in a pizza parlor.”

How did he get to where he is now? “Kindergarten, primary school, high school, art school. During the entire time, I would draw in class. Then I became a teacher. It’s better being a teacher because you get to decide what everyone does. And as I’m a plastic arts teacher, everyone can draw without getting yelled at.”

What does he enjoy in what he does? What’s missing? “I like finishing a drawing, I can then play Mario at last. I’m missing 20 stars and it’s not easy to catch all those purple coins.”
As you may have gathered, his latest news is a gig in a pizza parlor. He’s now going on tour, and hopes to see you all somewhere along the way.
His projects are all well defined at least: “Get an award for my music, write a screenplay for the X-Men and finish Dragon Quest 8 (I’ve played for 2 hours, another 118 and I should be done).”

Next!

Cats or dogs?
Cats. I hate dogs, all dogs. In life, you have to pick a side. And the logo of my association Nekomix is a cat. Cats rule!

What are the latest things you enjoyed in movies/books/comics?
All the Hercules and Xena episodes, the WWF Royal Rumble from 1988 to 1999, the X Men from 1963 to 2013 and French rap from 1990 to 2013.

Who are the artists you like and whose blogs you check out frequently?
I really like Yao and Erwann Surcouf’s blog. They’re really good (especially at Street Fighter and the E.T. game).  I appreciate Phicil’s work. He has a cute way of drawing animals. My favorite colorist is Drac. She can color without going over the lines. Oh, and I’d like to say that I really hate Mickael Roux. He’s bad at drawing pirates and he has the same initials as me.

Tell us what you enjoy in life, your passions, pastimes, vices, and everyday pleasures.
I like playing with the Nes, the Super Nintendo, the Nintendo 64, the Game cube, the Wii, the Game boy, the Game Boy Advance, the DS, the 3DS, the PS1, 2, 3, the PSP, the Megadrive, the Dreamcast and the Xbox. And when I’ve got some time left, I like drawing people.

Do you have any phobias? Which ones?
Umbrellas! I often imagine that I’m walking in the rain in the street with nothing to protect me when suddenly, WHAM!  A downpour blinds me and then WHAM! Someone in front almost pokes my eye out with their umbrella. Awful!

To finish off, ask yourself a question that you would’ve liked to have been asked, then choose whether to answer it or not.
M.Roda, which is your favorite X Men? Oh dear, not an easy question, I love loads of them, erm, I’ll say Cable because he’s older than his father and that’s classy.

 

To see this week’s illustrated FML, click here.

 

So, here are some videos to go, you can take them with you and consume them this weekend while they’re still hot. The first one is a bit disgusting, but it made me laugh a lot. A guy dares to eat a load of spicy stuff, and the results are pretty bad. Check it out here. In other news, a classic, the Mattstache version of Turn Me On by David Guetta and Nicki Minaj. See you next week!

 

If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DeviantArt. But don't send your illustration right away! You need first to get in touch with Alice, and she'll tell you what you have to do!

#1353 - Illustrated FML - On 02/16/2013 at 8:50am by Julien - 5 comments

Cyanide & Happiness show their balls

After turning down several offers to make TV shows, due to the fact that the contracts they were being given to sign would’ve suffocated their creativity to the point where Hollywood could’ve been called Houdini, our friends at C&H have now decided to create their own show on the interwebs.

Doing it on your own means no censorship, which is mainly what makes C&H’s sense of humour so special, you can feel its radical taste of freedom and breath mints coming at you. Using all the weapons they have at their disposal (an arsenal of pens and crayons), the people at C&H are one of the last bastions of hope in the face of the excesses of the politically correct army. The most valuable weapon they have is the elegance of their humour.

But to do all this, they need you and your generous donations. They’ve been pouring themselves into this project for a while now, but this makes it official. Their Kickstarter is officially here:
http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/explosm/the-cyanide-and-happiness-show

Dear Kris, Rob, Matt & Dave, The FML Team, as well as some of FML’s users will help you out. Because you have skill, talent, passion. And balls.

                          

#1352 - Special guests - On 02/15/2013 at 8:56am by The FML Team - 13 comments

FML’s Anti-Valentine’s Day

"Today, I was informed that my boyfriend's mother would be joining us on our Valentine's dinner. I'm not sure if this momma's boy thing is going to work out. FML"

 

Go on, admit it, you hate Valentine’s Day. Even if you don’t, you do.  No one needs a calendar to remember when to tell your significant other that you love them, and to buy them some shitty flowers. And if you do, you don’t deserve to be in a relationship with another human being. Try a pot plant. And if your significant other needs to be reminded to do so by a calendar, push them into a canal.

"Today, I pointed out to my boyfriend how Valentine's Day, my birthday, and our one-year anniversary were all coming up in the next few weeks. He then promptly broke up with me. FML"

 

The origins of the name are much disputed, some say he was a martyr, some say he was a priest who secretly married couples, and my next-door neighbour reckons he was the guy who was the captain of TV’s Love Boat (but my neighbour thinks that giving her cat her bogus homeopathy tablets will help its leg grow back, so she’s no use in a pub quiz team anyway). 
Anyway, here at FML, we’ve decided Valentine’s Day should be called out for what it really is: a celebration of the tacky side of love, the gaudy holiday for couples to prance about in front of single losers and rub everyone else’s nose in their lurve. Yeah, we’re not buying it.

"Today, for Valentine's Day, my boyfriend gave me the half-eaten chocolate bar that I left in his fridge two weeks ago. FML"

 

I know what you’re thinking: this guy’s a single loser, he’s bitter, he’s writing this because he’s angry about having to spend Valentine’s Day on his own watching Golden Girls reruns, yadda yadda yadda. You’re wrong. I’ll be watching The West Wing for the 56th time. I’ve got my whole evening planned out, but at least my plans aren’t as sad as this one:

 

"Today, I arranged to have some flowers delivered at work for Valentine's Day so that my colleagues will think someone likes me. FML"

 

Some gifts are pretty awful too:

 

"Today, my grandma sent me a Valentine's Day card. For years she's been hinting at me to lose weight. The card: a picture of cookies on the front and a gym membership inside. FML"

 

Or reasons for lack of gifts:

 

"Today, my boyfriend of 6 months told me he was not going to celebrate Valentine's Day because it was a 'capitalistic consumerism holiday'. He works in a bank and helps 'capitalism consumerism' 364 days a year. FML"

However, we strive to be open-minded, despite the bitterness. So I’m going to say that I do wish you a wonderful Valentine’s Day with your loved one. Or ones, if you’re into that sort of thing. As Woody Allen once said, “Sex between two people is a beautiful thing - between five, it's fantastic.”

 

The illustration was made by Rara, we've already welcomed her in july. Check out her blog!

#1351 - Ramblings - On 02/13/2013 at 4:28pm by Alan - 24 comments

FML's sex tape

Taking pleasure wherever we can, this time we take great pleasure in presenting the second installment of the FML web series. Now, as you can tell by that introduction, this time it’s a bit sexual, so you have been warned. But don’t worry: no children will result from these fantasy sequences; we do however hope that a few smiles will be born into the world.

Here we have the first few scenes shot by Logan Burdick and produced by Small Red Cape and The FML crew. It’s from these scenes that our collaborative work started between the shoots in L.A. and the finishing edits and sound design in Paris. You will probably recognize famous FMLs that you’ve already read, but augmented by the talented acting work of our friends Ben Giroux and Ray Chase. Enjoy!

Directed by: Logan Burdick
Starring: Ben Giroux and Ray Chase
Guest Starring: Kelly Huddleston, Emily Goss, and Scott Burman
1st AC / Gaffer: Alex Darke
Grip: Matthew Little
Location Supervisor: Aaron Ehberhart
Art Department: Karissa Barney
PA: Elissa Weinzimmer
Edited by: Logan Burdick
Post production: Noside Production
Sound Design: Gizmo Deluxe
Sound Engineer: S Joly /  JL Fauvel
Creative Director: Didier Guedj
Special thanks to Morgan Prêleur and Steve Maisel.

 
Logan Burdick and Morgan Prêleur 

#1350 - Videos - On 02/11/2013 at 11:33am by The FML Team - 39 comments


Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: