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The Best of the Worst #24

Hello, fellow FML-ers! As it's the beginning of a new month, it's probably the right time to drop another Best of the Worst of FML. It's Friday as well, so what better day to kick one over the fence so you guys can check it out at a leisurely pace, while totally ignoring work, your boss, your teachers, or whatever authority figure usually looms over you during the day. So, without any further ado, here's this month's selection.  

For the people who have never seen this section of FML before: we get sent lots of FMLs, each day, all day. We only publish a few due to the fact that a lot are not very good, copies of old FMLs or just plain bad. Amongst those, we also get sent very weird stories, if you can call them stories. That's what we post in this column. This is a collection of the best of the worst FMLs that people have sent in to us. Have a gander at this month's selection!
 

For all my cholos 

So today, I was kickin’ back at my barrio with a couple of my cholos and cholas, Den deez Eastcoast Changos rode in screamin THUGLIFE and opened fire, as They took the gat out I took mine out and accidentally friendly fired my Homie, RIP Big EseTortuga…, FML

The lizard king

Today, I was diagnosed with reptile dysfunction?? Where do I go from here…FML


Smoke on the water closet

Today, when i finished smoking in my bathroom, tride to drop a finished sigaret in a toilet. it would have been ok, but i was seating on it and burned my penis. and what do i say to a doctor?


Lover, I don't have to love

i went to a bright eyes concert and i found out connor oberst is 30. FML


PETA file

My Mexican friend Xavier sucked a banana in front of me and made a petafile smirk… at my pants, he has Mexican friends to. ): FML


OK then

Today, it has been exactly 6 months since I have left my high school campus which is situated on a hill. FML


Fo' real

Today Real? I am not gonna fing other thing like this FML

Bad anatomy

Today, I realized no matter what I try, I can’t stimulate my clitorus. I get more pleasure cleaning my ears. My clitorus is broken. FML


Fantasma

Today, i sucked a D it was fantasma. Note: im a 42 year old indian man FML?


Jerry Springer

so my dad thought my mom was cheating so he cheated on my mom and then my mom found out and she got mad and then threatened to file a case against him and then he left the house then he refused to support his family cuz he tryna fight my mom. the girl my dad cheating with is pregnant, with him. FML


That's it for this month. We'll be back next month for some more weird FMLs, because there's plenty more in our backlog. You can probably see some yourself by using the "Moderate the FMLs" feature on our website/app. As usual, these all have been collected from the website right from the very beginning, so don't bother trying to send in your own weird ramblings to try and get them published in here, it won't work. Take care!
 

 

Bonus track: This person thinks that the world (and FML) is run by obscure forces that conspire to make everyone polite and nice to each other. It's not, unfortunately.
 

It's a conspiracy!

Today, I got online to read some FML’s only to notice the website had been updated to reflect the political correctness of the world by replacing the “you deserved it” button with “glad it wasn’t me”. FML.

#1597 - About FMyLife - On 06/02/2016 at 9:49am by Alan - 49 comments

Top comments

  • "The girl my dad cheating with is pregnant, with him."

    Interesting. Will she give birth to a younger version of him, do you think, or is she going to squeeze out a balding 40 year old man? In that case the universe isn't the only thing that's going to be torn a new space hole.

    #1 - On 06/03/2016 at 11:05am by Baustigt

    See in context

  • My heart goes out to the person who left their high school campus on a hill six months ago. It's been years since I did the same, and I've never fully recovered. It gets easier after the first ten months; the hill doesn't seem as big in hindsight. I don't think it ever quite levels out completely, though.

    #3 - On 06/03/2016 at 11:48am by Tripartita

    See in context

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