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FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, I learned that when you flush the toilet, the contents do not disappear into oblivion. They show up in your basement when your sewer backs up. And they come in greater numbers. FML

#3794107
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48713) - you deserved it (3703)

On 07/16/2009 at 3:26am - misc - by megxox (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

meg_xox's comment about their FML

So this is my FML (and I'm pretty overjoyed that it actually got accepted), but to everyone who is talking about the pipes...this is a house we're renting and we didn't know that the pipes were OLD (not cheap). And our landlord never fixed them because it would cost about $17,000 to redo everything. So we had to deal with it. And we found this out AFTER the basement was flooded. So while I appreciate your attempt to insult me, didn't really work =)

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Today, my friend put a bunch of cheetos all over me at the beach while I was taking a nap. Next thing I know I'm being woken up by a bunch of seagulls attacking me. One pooped in my hair. FML

#3792988
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42068) - you deserved it (4430)

On 07/16/2009 at 2:30am - misc - by kewlcat (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

kewlcat's comment about their FML

ok , first of all, its not fake.
second of all, i was actually sleeping, more just like, resting, with my eyes closed.
also, i live in vancouver which is just above seattle,
so we have beaches
and we dont get snow.

aaand yes it is really funny to see, just make sure you don't let them get you back ;)

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Today, I was hit by a car. My sister ran to see if her phone I was carrying in my purse was okay. She screamed at me while I lay in the street because I was so dumb, and that I couldn't even watch for cars. Her screen was cracked. I had to call 911 for myself. FML

#3777289
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57902) - you deserved it (3513)

On 07/15/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by hockey9797 (woman) - United States (New York)

hockey9797's comment about their FML

yeah i broke both my arm and leg on my right side and a few ribs it's not fake

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Inod's comment about their FML

I'm the OP, decided to make an account...

Reason I put on so much weight is cause I had a car run up my leg by a 16 year old bitch who was too busy chatting on her phone to even notice she hit me. So after my broken foot, ankle, and leg "healed", I got to go through the process of starting rehab on all the torn stuff in my ankle. 18 months later, I can walk again with only a slight limp. Yay!

Believe me, I'd love to be able to go out for a walk or hit the gym but some days (rainy days especally) going from bed to the bathroom is a chore and any kind of incline or decline hurts still. And I didn't know I was over 330 when I got to the store (got a scale too, 334... what a bitch, huh?) so that was a huge shock. Obviously I know I was overweight, but not this bad.

Thanks to like the 10 people with kind words... the rest of you enjoy your summer, high school starts back up in about 8 weeks.

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Today, my sister got her car repossessed. In order to get it back, my mom took $4,000.00 out of my bank account promising she would pay it back within a few months. She lost her job. FML

#3523681
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47151) - you deserved it (3515)

On 07/06/2009 at 4:11am - money - by T4K3R5 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

T4K3R5's comment about their FML

Okay im just going to say this now so everyone will get this. I have my OWN bank account that no one has access too accept me. I opened it when i was like 16 and got my first job. I saved the $4000 in a separate account that was in my moms name before i was 16, which i got just from mowing lawns and stuff. So Everyone stop saying "Well your dumb, that's your fault for letting your mom have access to your account". Also im not going to get into details, but it wasn't really my sisters fault, so i don't blame her. My sister and my mom have helped me out with a lot of things too.

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Today, I came home and found out that my new roommate, who smokes half a pack of cigarettes a day and drinks heavily 5 nights a week, had smashed my $300 bong because "weed is a horrible and deadly drug that will kill you slowly." FML

#3521294
458 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55641) - you deserved it (34094)

On 07/06/2009 at 1:55am - misc - by expen_dable (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

expen_dable's comment about their FML

1. my roommates a girl
2. My old roommate and I both bought the bong and split the price but when she transferred colleges she let me keep it
3. my roommate does drink usually 5 nights a week and she is 19 so she isn't exactly law abiding either

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Today, I was fired from my volunteer job. Why? Because they said I was working so hard and doing such a good job that I was making the real staff look bad. FML

#3506219
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58349) - you deserved it (3595)

On 07/05/2009 at 3:04pm - work - by SDworkinggirl (woman) - United States (South Dakota)

SDworkinggirl's comment about their FML

Okay so let me clarify some things that people are either stupid or confused about. I voluteered in an organization that has retirement homes all over the country, and helps seniors with limited means. I started volunteering, because it looks good on a resume and I was having a hard time getting a job. So I started volunteering at this retirement home, but I quickly grew to love it, and soon I was working hard because I truely enjoyed visiting with the seniors and delivering mail to them, among the other things I did there. Unknown to me, some of the residents started to complain about how I was nicer and more caring than most of the nurses. They didn't hire me because, I am not a nurse, and I don't have a college degree yet, so there was no position open for me. And the guy who "fired" me let me know why I was being let go, kinda in secret otherwise I doubt I would have been told why they let me go.

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shandrith's comment about their FML

Hi, I'm the one that posted this FML. I know that cheating wasn't a good thing to do, but that wasn't the point of the FML. Had I simply found out that he was cheating with someone else, of either gender as I knew that he was bi when we entered the relationship, I would have said nothing. The reason I posted it, and the reason I do consider it to be an FML is because of the absolute ridiculousness of the fact that we were cheating with the SAME PERSON!!! The three of us have spoken and decided that none of us are going to continue seeing each other. The BF and I were obviously both deeply unhappy, and the third part took advantage of both of us. Ex and I will probably remain friends, and chalk this up to one of those errors in life that are hilarious five years later, but hurt like hell when they happen. #3 can go to hell for all I care

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Today, I was home alone in the shower when in the opening of the curtain, I could see a man in a ski mask. I passed out, hit my head on the tub. I then found out it was my dad pulling a prank on me. I almost died cause my dad wanted to see me scream like a girl. FML

#3393959
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48334) - you deserved it (4357)

On 07/01/2009 at 12:31pm - misc - by dfan13 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

dfan13's comment about their FML

Hey, original poster here..

He wasnt trying to see me naked. We have a shower curtain where u can see out if ur in the shower but cant see in if your out. And i did almost die because i cracked my head open.

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Today, my husband passed a massive kidney stone. He is so proud of it that he wants to decorate our home with it. It is now sitting on my kitchen counter next to my produce. FML

#3272102
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47640) - you deserved it (3322)

On 06/27/2009 at 10:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

lmsquadritolaux's comment about their FML

Ok everyone. I originally posted this FML as anonymous and didn't think it would make the cut. But it looks like I got a huge response.

IT IS TRUE for all of you haters. My husband has been battling with this stone since September and he FINALLY passed it (after numerous X-rays and CT scans, ER visits, and going to see a specialist). It wasn't the size of a fist (like some of you had said) but it was pretty large considering it had to come out of a tiny hole :). It is not tiny by any means!!! It's decorative life on my kitchen counter will be limited because his urologist wants to analyze it. THANK GOD!

As to how he got it out of the toilet for everyone who asked: He didn't pee into his hand...gross. It came out and he reached in the toilet with a gallon sized plastic bag covering his hand so he wouldn't be soaked in piss. His urologist gave him a strainer but that was on display in my bathroom for months and I threw it out...GO FIGURE! That strainer was huge though, how was he suppose to carry it around with him to piss in? On a chain around his neck?! The stone was easy to find because his was multi-colored (brown/black, and off-white). It has spike like features which looks scary and painful.

He was going to get it blasted for everyone who still doesn't believe. The procedure is $10,000....and we don't have that kind of money (I'm sure our insurance would have covered some of it). Plus the blasting is not always successful. Every time my husband thought about getting it blasted, the stone would move around (just like a baby, lol) and he would be pissing blood for days.

I had fun reading everyones comments. Hopefully, I answered all of the questions.

Lea, Brad, and Brad's kidney stone :)

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Today, I went to Burger King. I was sipping the drink and put it on my window sill to save for later. I fell asleep, and when I woke up my mouth was dry. I took a sip and felt something go into my mouth. Thinking it was an ice cube, I bit down on it. It was not an ice cube. It was a cockroach. FML

#3267613
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49492) - you deserved it (13028)

On 06/27/2009 at 3:24am - misc - by LoLLightning (woman) - United States (Florida)

LoLLightning's comment about their FML

OP here, okay for all of those who are retarded and have never tried to submit an FML before, you only get 300 characters. Most people can put together that I got my food, went home, and put the drink on my window sill and fell asleep. I wasn't exactly thinking that the ice melted when I was more than half asleep and thirsty. I'm sorry that I can't describe my experience in intricate detail for all the retards that don't understand normal human talk. Thank you very much.

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Today, I got my wisdom teeth out. My doctor said it was okay to eat, so, I had some mashed potatoes. Apparently, my body disagreed with the doctor, because I threw up. Because my face was so swollen, it didn't make it out my mouth. It went through my nose instead. I literally blew chunks. FML

#3258248
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49377) - you deserved it (2965)

On 06/26/2009 at 10:35pm - health - by bloodynose (woman) - United States (New York)

chunkynose's comment about their FML

lol the mashed potatoes I had were kind of chunky, and so after I threw up, there were still bits of it left in my nose. I had to blow my nose to get them out, and so I blew chunks of taters out my nose into the tissue.

my mom almost fainted. :)

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Today, my little nieces and nephews were about to have a water balloon fight. I was told to take pictures. They hit me. And my $600 camera. FML

#3139134
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41375) - you deserved it (10075)

On 06/23/2009 at 3:21am - kids - by DntH8 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

DntH8's comment about their FML

I'm a poor college student so spending several thousand dollars on camera is way out of my budget. Trust me. It wasn't my idea to use my SLR. And if I had had it my way I'd have told my family members to shove it and put their own camera in the line of fire.

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