Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, I went to a concert. I got into a fist fight with a drunk girl. My older brother tried to pull me away from her by holding both my arms back. I spent the last half of the concert in the hospital because I couldn't shield my face. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30378) - you deserved it (7133)

On 10/17/2011 at 10:14am - misc - by alliegator_13 - United States

alliegator_13's comment about their FML

I'm a girl and yes my name is Allie. I tried to push him off of me but army dudes are tough. He was trained to fight and he still got his sister beat up. Haha. It's ok, I'll get even.

See all the comments

Today, while jogging in the park, I saw a man acting strange and trying to talk to 3 little girls. I jogged over to their mother and warned her about a 'weirdo' lurking around her daughters. Turns out that 'weirdo' is the woman's disabled brother. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28386) - you deserved it (18123)

On 10/15/2011 at 9:13pm - misc - by cristina_laila (woman) - United States (California)

cristina_laila's comment about their FML

I saw a man wearing a bike helmet, flailing his arms and following the little girls around. I kept jogging and saw a woman sitting on a park bench texting. She was completely out of site of the girls. I kindly asked her if she was their mother. When she replied 'yes', I told her that I saw a man talking to her daughters and that he looked like a weirdo...that's when she told me that the 'weirdo' was her disabled brother. I apologized to her and took off. I'm not a judgmental person; I was acting on my instincts as a woman to protect these young girls. Believe me, I'm mortified!!!

See all the comments

Today, I got a speeding ticket while taking my drivers license test. FML


I agree, your life sucks (13342) - you deserved it (33912)

On 10/13/2011 at 12:55pm - misc - by dust1535538 (man) - United States (Virginia)

dust1535538's comment about their FML

First off, this is my FML. Second, I was on a road that just so happened to not have a posted speed limit. So I just assumed the speed limit to be 45, unfortunatly according to the law here on a unposted road the limit is 35. No I didn't pass.

See all the comments

Today, after a week of searching, I found my escaped snake. In my umbrella, outside, after opening it over my head. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24543) - you deserved it (7431)

On 10/11/2011 at 11:22am - misc - by lollymay13 (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

lollymay13's comment about their FML

Just so you all know, I am not afraid of my pet snake. The FML was a mixture of a) the snake had been in an obvious hiding place, a dark enclosed space, all along. And b) because anything that falls on your bloody head outside is going to give you a fright! He is healthy and happy, he didn't die, and has not escaped since! :) And as for all the St.Patrick comments.... 'driving the snakes out of Ireland' was a metaphor for the Catholics driving all of the Pagans out of Ireland. Of course there are real snakes here.... actually pagans too. Well there ya go! lol :) x

See all the comments

Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25525) - you deserved it (4181)

On 10/06/2011 at 6:20am - misc - by kemando - Canada (Alberta)

kemando's comment about their FML

Damn straight. His name's rascal.

See all the comments including 2 other original poster's reactions

Today, I came home from school and found my mother singing along to her latest investment, a compilation CD filled with heavy metal covers of ABBA classics. FML


I agree, your life sucks (18500) - you deserved it (3162)

On 10/06/2011 at 6:11am - misc - by kansah (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

kansah's comment about their FML

I am just going to make it clear, if the covers were decent I would be able to tolerate them and give my mum credit for having such excellent taste in music, however the covers are utterly horrible.

See all the comments including another original poster's reaction

Today, I was supposed to get married but we had to postpone as the best man fled the country. With the marriage certificate and vendor money. Not to mention the rings. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40980) - you deserved it (3093)

On 10/05/2011 at 2:23am - love - by princesspuffypan (woman) - South Africa

princesspuffypan's comment about their FML

This is my FML... yes I am married now and no the cops didn't catch him. The reason he was best man in the first place was due to family politics. We managed to have a small wedding shortly after but we still had to pay cost of cancellation.

See all the comments

Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML


I agree, your life sucks (25764) - you deserved it (3690)

On 10/02/2011 at 1:15am - work - by katt_is_here (woman) - United States (Colorado)

katt_is_here's comment about their FML

Clarification time I guess. The wig was still in the bag as it was at the store. The pimp cane was another item sold at the store. I chose brevity in the FML for impact. No pun intended.

I should add that I was dressed as zombie Amy Winehouse at the time so I had a horrible beehive wig on. It was a very interesting evening.

See all the comments including 6 other original poster's reactions

Today, I learned no matter how much your friends pressure you, you must never snort lines of curry powder. FML


I agree, your life sucks (7650) - you deserved it (60341)

On 10/01/2011 at 2:48am - health - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Avalanches's comment about their FML

I cried.

See all the comments including 4 other original poster's reactions

Today, I timed my walk to work perfectly so that I avoided getting sprayed by the rotating sprinklers along the street. As soon as I successfully passed the last sprinkler, a bus sped by me, hit a puddle, and covered me head to toe in muddy water. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31091) - you deserved it (3022)

On 09/28/2011 at 1:54pm - misc - by Daralea (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Daralea's comment about their FML

They always do, and I don't know why. They even have it aimed at the sidewalks half the time.

See all the comments

Today, my boyfriend bought me a gorgeous ring that I fell in love with. As he slid the ring on my finger for the first time, he started moving it up and down my finger and making loud sex sounds, completely ruining the romantic moment. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35173) - you deserved it (5918)

On 09/27/2011 at 1:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

katethegreatxx's comment about their FML

So, I'm the person that submitted this, I made an account to clear up confusion on my story. This wasn't an engagement ring, or a promise ring, just something to say that he loved me. The ring wasn't ridiculously expensive, and I'm grateful for it AND him, no matter what the price is. I wasn't complaining about him, more like ranting about what happened. I thought it was funny, and thought that other people might too. Trust me, I know that I'm very lucky, and fortunate to have a guy like him, even if he didn't take the moment seriously. But, that's what makes him special in my eyes, since he has a sense of humor. :)

See all the comments

Today, a fly got stuck up my nose while I was giving a speech. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28221) - you deserved it (2283)

On 09/21/2011 at 11:25am - animals - by agent_awesome - United Kingdom

agent_awesome's comment about their FML

i popped it out by holding down the other nostril and was awkward. but atleast i gave the people a story to tell. one day when its not so fresh i will look back and laugh...i hope

See all the comments

Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: