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FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, while sleeping, I heard an explosion. My neighbor then knocked on my door and informed me that he had just hit my car with shrapnel from a cannon. Not only do I not have a car to drive, but I also have to put this claim on my insurance due to my neighbor being on welfare. FML

#15209261
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28370) - you deserved it (2346)

On 03/05/2011 at 7:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Iowa)

Leverathin's comment about their FML

For anyone that's following this, the cops were called. I was on the phone with my insurance company due to him not having any kind of insurance. Next thing I know the cops are busting into the building with shields and rifles

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Today, I realised how poor I am when I found myself fishing out a two dollar coin someone had left behind in a public toilet bowl. FML

#15160743
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28823) - you deserved it (6102)

On 03/01/2011 at 7:12am - money - by youshitme (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

youshitme's comment about their FML

Hello all ... I've just seen the comments on this ... There were quite a few comments assuming that since I fished out a 2 buck coin from a dunny, that I'd be an unemployed dole bludger. I've never been on any sort of welfare. The previous comment of Sydney being a very expensive city to live in was correct. I don't earn that much, generally between $700-$1100 a week, depending on how busy work is, but I've never been a 'dole bludger', I work very hard, thank you very much.

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Today, I got a call from the police dept. My ex-boyfriend is applying for a job there, and they called me to ask if he was "a good candidate for a police officer." I had to start my day off by saying great, nice things about the guy who broke my heart and completely disrespected me. FML

#15088982
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26112) - you deserved it (18247)

On 02/23/2011 at 9:26am - love - by karmaplz (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

karmaplz's comment about their FML

I feel the need to clear up some of this discussion!
First of all--thanks to all these anon. people for defending me. I honestly submitted this immediately after getting the phone call @ 8:30 am, never thinking it'd be posted.
Secondly-- is he a bad guy? No. I'm sure if being a cop is what he wants to do, and has his heart in it, he'll do great at his job.
As far as the disrespect: it got to a point where I wasn't valued as a person, and some very vulgar, vile, rude and hurtful things were said/done to me, that wouldn't have been done if I was respected for who I am. If I was seen as a human with a heart and feelings, these things wouldn't have been done. Can I say that this will never happen to another female? No. Do I think he's pure evil? No. Saying bad things would have been purely vengeful and ruined a potential career.
Also, I wasn't listed a reference, they required names and phone numbers of "significant relationships"--- I was asked if there was ever an assault between us, and about his moral character. That's it. I've had a seriously great laugh over realizing this was actually posted, and loved reading all the comments. Thanks!

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Today, I was babysitting a little girl. We were colouring, and she told me she wanted to draw a picture of me. After she was done, she showed me the picture. I'm drawn as a fat cow. The worst part is, the picture actually looks kinda like me. FML

#15065253
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26647) - you deserved it (9557)

On 02/21/2011 at 12:48pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

magoo16's comment about their FML

I wrote this FML and...
I'm not fat actually, she drew a cow and put a human head on it that actually looked like me.
It wasn't the cow part but the head part that looked like me, and she only drew me as a cow because she calls me "Morgy Moo Moo". So no it's not my fault and i shouldn't "Go on a diet" and no i do not have low self-esteem. I just thought it was pretty funny she drew me as a cow! :)

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Today, my sister lost a leg. Immediately after hearing the news, my boyfriend started cracking jokes about getting her a job at IHOP. FML

#14931117
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46662) - you deserved it (5753)

On 02/11/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by mariet (woman) - United States

mariet's comment about their FML

Holy hell, I forgot that this made it to the site.
To answer some questions: This happened several years ago. My sister is a soldier, was deployed, bomb went off, lost her leg. I'm not going into details because it's still difficult to discuss. She has a desk job now and gets around fine on a prosthetic.

We did not break up directly because of this. We had a huge row and I threw him out of my apartment. I didn't speak to him for a week. He apologized, said he just felt awkward and didn't know what to say, and I forgave him. We broke up later for different reasons. Mostly he is a nice guy, he had never shown any kind of insensitivity before this (he even came with me to my grandmother's funeral) but this was a bonehead moment.

Some people suggested that I "know it's funny." In a hypothetical situation, it is funny. After she went through physical and emotional therapy, it is funny. I was reminded of this event because we went to IHOP and she jokingly asked for an application, saying she is automatically qualified. But at that moment, when I was in shock and could barely breathe? Nothing was funny. When you hear this kind of news and you are not even sure if your sister is going to live, she is the only one that can cheer you up. So fuck you guys.

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Today, I got a call from my daughter’s teacher asking me to come pick her up. My daughter wouldn’t tell her what was wrong. I left an important work meeting. When I got there she stated her boyfriend broke up with her and she couldn't emotionally make it through the rest of the day. She's 5. FML

#14895489
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52678) - you deserved it (7256)

On 02/08/2011 at 12:46pm - kids - by mom21 - United States (Wisconsin)

mom21's comment about their FML

WOW. First off, the only reason I posted this was because I called my husband to tell him about this and he thought itd be funny to post this on here. Now I wish I hadn't. Most of you people are more dramatic than my daughter. I made an account to defend my child. She's five. She was just being silly...

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Today, I found out about my parent's divorce over Facebook. FML

#14851025
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38025) - you deserved it (2635)

On 02/05/2011 at 10:36am - misc - by MissCommunication (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

MissCommunicate's comment about their FML

I am only seventeen, and that's how I found out. My parents were then quick to give me the "talk".

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Today, while in my doctor's packed waiting room, an elderly woman insisted I take her seat. I thanked her, but politely declined. She began to yell, saying I was "ungrateful", until I sat down. She then left, laughing, as I discovered that she peed in the chair. Apparently, she does this often. FML

#14823430
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39223) - you deserved it (4037)

On 02/03/2011 at 5:40am - health - by Summer_Jane (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Summer_Jane's comment about their FML

Seriously - you guys rock. I laughed waaay too much reading all your comments. And for all you guys who were asking how did I not notice the pee? -- Yeah, I keep asking myself that, too. - It was one of those crazy patterned (ugly) cushioned chairs, so I couldn't tell it was damp. I_did_smell something, but doctors' offices have a lot of smells (as do elderly people...), so I didn't really think about it too much. But yeah...next time I'm assuming the worst.

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Today, I found out that in conclusion to working five nights in a row, I'm scheduled to work the night shift on Valentine's day with my ex-boyfriend. FML

#14774079
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29369) - you deserved it (3453)

On 01/30/2011 at 12:28pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

gingerleigh's comment about their FML

it's not a full time job. It's my 2nd job. I'm also in school. I'm not working all 5 nights with him, just 2 including the last, but it's still going to be extreme an extreme over load of work.

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Today, I got home from my holidays to find my flatmate has moved his girlfriend in without asking me. Not only does she walk around naked, she has also redecorated the rooms. FML

#14752507
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25343) - you deserved it (3669)

On 01/29/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by iluvpeanutbutter (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

iluvpeanutbutter's comment about their FML

Hi everyone,
I'm the OP here- I know this is ridiculously late, but whenever I tried to post when this was new, FML wouldn't let me. Anyway, the situation was that my boyfriend and I were living together, and a mutual male friend moved in with us as he and his ex had broken up. He started dating another girl, and 6 weeks after they started dating (while we were on holiday), we got home and found she had moved in without our permission.
She had left crap all over the place, and moved a bunch of our stuff into cupboards (e.g. artwork, vases, books etc) and replaced it with her own stuff. As we had furnished the entire house, we were pretty pissed off. We were gone for 2 weeks. When we got home, she was walking down the hallway naked, and in the following days often walked naked from our flatmate's bedroom to the bathroom, or would just wander around the house in a bikini. She isn't hot; she looks like an absolute tramp. I've seen classier hookers on their corners.
She was just an all-around cow. She didn't have a job, so she just used all our stuff (including my expensive toiletries). She had just turned vegetarian, and would pitch bitch fits if we cooked meat in the house (so I made steaks every other night). They ended up moving out about a month later.

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Today, I was out with my boyfriend, and I had an epileptic fit. He had never seen me have one, and it freaked him out. He rang me later to dump me, as he didn't want to go out with someone who acted like a 'spaz' in public. FML

#14729372
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37622) - you deserved it (3778)

On 01/27/2011 at 6:28am - love - by gmarina789 (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

gmarina789's comment about their FML

Hey guys, thanks for posting all your comments, I have read them all. Firstly i'd like to say that epilepsy is a condition that can't be helped, so i'm kind of stuck with it and its not necessarily genetic. I am proud of who I am and I wouldn't change who I am even if I could. Secondly, I did tell my ex that I had epilepsy, I told him straight away so he was aware of my condition; to not tell him would have been unfair. Thirdly thanks to all the people who understand what its like and have written messages of support, I really appreciate it. To those who have written 'negative' comments, you are entitled to your own opinion, just don't share it with me. Being called a 'spaz' or saying that 'i'm sick' or 'not normal' is uncalled for. I'm currently studying Medicine at Birmingham Uni to try and help those like me, and all i'm going to say is how ironic would it be if one of you who have said i'm 'not normal' came into a hospital where I was working and I saved your life...I guess you wouldn't be saying stuff then. Again, thanks for all the positive comments :)

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Today, my ex boyfriend apologized for being a jerk to me and threatening our relationship. When he was done, he asked if his apology earned him enough points for a blowjob. FML

#14661632
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31500) - you deserved it (5054)

On 01/21/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IHateDumbExs (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

IHateDumbExs's comment about their FML

Haha he didn't come to see me, he came to where I was volunteering to pick up his little sister. He just saw me in passing and asked.

And no, his apology was definitely not worth a blowjob.

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Today, my boyfriend proposed to me with a voice card. It said "Marry me Amber?" I'm not Amber. That's his ex. FML

#14626381
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36001) - you deserved it (3027)

On 01/18/2011 at 1:16pm - love - by dubblechic - United States (New Hampshire)

xXDubbleChic's comment about their FML

I dumped him on the spot

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