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FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, my boyfriend bought me a gorgeous ring that I fell in love with. As he slid the ring on my finger for the first time, he started moving it up and down my finger and making loud sex sounds, completely ruining the romantic moment. FML

#17847729
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35007) - you deserved it (5904)

On 09/27/2011 at 1:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

katethegreatxx's comment about their FML

So, I'm the person that submitted this, I made an account to clear up confusion on my story. This wasn't an engagement ring, or a promise ring, just something to say that he loved me. The ring wasn't ridiculously expensive, and I'm grateful for it AND him, no matter what the price is. I wasn't complaining about him, more like ranting about what happened. I thought it was funny, and thought that other people might too. Trust me, I know that I'm very lucky, and fortunate to have a guy like him, even if he didn't take the moment seriously. But, that's what makes him special in my eyes, since he has a sense of humor. :)

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Today, a fly got stuck up my nose while I was giving a speech. FML

#17795106
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28127) - you deserved it (2276)

On 09/21/2011 at 11:25am - animals - by agent_awesome - United Kingdom

agent_awesome's comment about their FML

i popped it out by holding down the other nostril and blowing.it was awkward. but atleast i gave the people a story to tell. one day when its not so fresh i will look back and laugh...i hope

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Today, while at work, after reading more than 100 FMLs and moderating more than 500, I decided to write one of my own with the help of my boss, who had been standing next to me for over an hour. "How about being fired?" FML

#17793469
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9993) - you deserved it (52053)

On 09/21/2011 at 2:47am - work - by f_ck_U (man) - China (Zhejiang)

f_ck_U's comment about their FML

more than 100 means those confirmed and posted FMLs. That 500 are those unconfirmed which need you to click Y or N.

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Today, on my way to a concert, some guy told me I had cool sunglasses. I was about to thank him until he punched me in the face. I woke up with no sunglasses and no ticket. FML

#17770950
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32008) - you deserved it (2435)

On 09/18/2011 at 9:36am - misc - by incaseudidntkno - United States (Illinois)

incaseudidntkno's comment about their FML

They were Oil Rig Oakleys and my face still hurts. My friend also got punched in the nose haha.

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Today, I will be sleeping in my aunt and uncle's living room. It is 90 degrees. There is an air conditioner but if you turn it on, the raccoons living in the wall will get pissed off and try to claw through the wall. Only five more nights sweating my balls off or imagining racoons having angry sex. FML

#17762422
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24435) - you deserved it (2392)

On 09/17/2011 at 2:56am - misc - by ironik970 - United States (Colorado)

ironik970's comment about their FML

OP here, I can kill a raccoon if it "comes after me" but all of the animal grunting and weird sounds emitting from the walls just paint an image of frightening animal sex in my mind. By the way its the only room on the floor so it's not coming from the room next door.

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Today, at 7am, I was woken up by a telemarketer. He tried to sell me a bedroom set containing "a comfortable pillow and goose feather cover". I was working the graveyard shift and had only just gotten to sleep an hour earlier. FML

#17744412
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23748) - you deserved it (2423)

On 09/14/2011 at 2:50pm - work - by kareltje (man) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

kareltje's comment about their FML

Can't they make a living during office hours? That would've given me 2 hours of sleep at least...

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Today, my parents came to my house for my birthday. My mom backed her car into my motorcycle, knocking it over. She said because it was my birthday I could pay for the damages to her car later. FML

#17743896
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29512) - you deserved it (1791)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:42pm - money - by Zx6r (man) - United States

Zx6r's comment about their FML

It only slid down my driveway messed up the paint and clutch cover. Happy birthday to me

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Today, I got kicked off the train because I refused to stand for an old lady who wanted to sit down. There was an empty seat right next to me. FML

#17741945
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28176) - you deserved it (6622)

On 09/14/2011 at 1:42am - misc - by Godsfavourite (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Godsfavourite's comment about their FML

The train had those seats that run parallel with the walls of the train, not the window and aisle seats. And I tell you know that the lady was just one of those people that looks down their nose at most youth. I was in no way disrespectful to her and when I pointed out the seat next to me and she went and told the security guards that I refused to stand up for her. It's messed up, man. OP

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Today, my husband went downstairs to play Call of Duty. When he came back after only 20 minutes I said, "Awww, did you miss me?" He said, "No, the controller died." FML

#17708616
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26739) - you deserved it (7462)

On 09/10/2011 at 1:15am - misc - by bluestarr1 - United States (Ohio)

bluestarr1's comment about their FML

I'm pregnant & on bed-rest. I rely on him for a lot since I can't go downstairs. I thought him playing COD with his friends would give us a break from our constant interactions with each other. It just wasn't long enough for him. And keeping him entertained wasn't a part of our wedding vowels.

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Today, I needed to pay off a $35 parking ticket. To try and get some sort of revenge, I went to the bank and got 3,500 pennies, dumped them into a bucket, and refused to pay with anything besides the pennies. They called the police. I was arrested and cited $147. FML

#17701146
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18397) - you deserved it (43145)

On 09/09/2011 at 12:04am - money - by Not_you17 - United States (Georgia)

Not_you17's comment about their FML

Ok so here is an update, they canceled my $147 fine because I was using 100% legal us tender. However in order to pay off the $35 in pennies they had to either be rolled by the bank or I had to count them 1 by 1, so I rolled 'em.

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Today, after falling on my way out the door, hitting a bird with my car, and sitting in an hour and a half of traffic, I remembered I had the day off work. FML

#17688487
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28261) - you deserved it (12168)

On 09/07/2011 at 1:37pm - work - by seriously? - United States

LittlexSparrow's comment about their FML

Did it say the bird died? Lol

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Today, my roommate got completely wasted. He was so drunk he thought the fridge was talking. He decided to make it stop by unplugging it. Most of our food is basically ruined now. FML

#17677805
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26310) - you deserved it (2414)

On 09/06/2011 at 1:56am - misc - by Mattador - United States (Georgia)

Mattador's comment about their FML

And by basically I mean completely ruined.

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Today, I have been released from jail because my idiot friends decided to get me a surprise hooker for my birthday. Turns out "Candy" was actually an undercover cop. My friends ditched me. I was the only one arrested. FML

#17649584
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42683) - you deserved it (4118)

On 09/03/2011 at 12:48am - intimacy - by BlootheBawss - United States (Florida)

Bloothebawss's comment about their FML

It's illegal where I live. And yeah, I'm working in the new friends thing.

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