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FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, I came home from work to find my computer smashed into a hundred pieces. My dad threw it at my mom because they were having a fight and my computer was the closest thing to throw. He refuses to fix it. FML

#16434880
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42105) - you deserved it (2777)

On 05/31/2011 at 12:44pm - money - by Taurus_ChicKa (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Taurus_ChicKa's comment about their FML

OP here, let me clear it up. Mom blamed my computer for something I said so she thought I was turning spaghetti brained and demanded Dad to unhook it. Menopause is a bitch. So after hours of this Dad yanked the comp out and threw it NOT directly at Mom but...

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Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend to let me give her a foot massage after she had a long day at work. Halfway through, she fell asleep. Wanting to see how ticklish she actually was, I started to tickle her feet. She then kicked me straight in the nuts whilst sleeping. FML

#16419549
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9812) - you deserved it (57114)

On 05/30/2011 at 3:15pm - love - by anon80214 (man) - United States (Indiana)

anon80214's comment about their FML

Yeah, I probably did deserve that one.

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Today, I went to a restaurant and sat at the last available table, which had a seat available across from me. A cute girl approached and asked if she could sit down, so I said "Sure" and made some room. She then asked "You're leaving, right?" FML

#16361909
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32706) - you deserved it (3166)

On 05/26/2011 at 7:36pm - misc - by StatusSearch (man) - United States (California)

StatusSearch's comment about their FML

I told her I'd be done in 10 minutes which I was prepared to leave at that time, to which she replied, "Could you make it 5, I'm really hungry." So 10 minutes turned into 50. I must've lost track of time >_>

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Today, I refused to let two students into class because they were 15 minutes late. It turns out they were late because they had gone to buy me a birthday cake. FML

#16330528
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11101) - you deserved it (66476)

On 05/24/2011 at 5:34pm - work - by LimeyGoodteeth (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

LimeyGoodteeth's comment about their FML

I am the original poster. It was an adult ESOL class. School policy - strictly adhered to - is that students can't be admitted if they are more than 5 minutes late and all students know this. Lateness is disruptive and disrespectful to other students. We all eventually had the cake later anyway!

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Today, while trying to sneak out of my house to go to a party I met my mom trying to sneak back in. FML

#16277413
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34286) - you deserved it (7350)

On 05/21/2011 at 3:28am - misc - by wolfie898 - United States (Texas)

Wolfie898's comment about their FML

my mom is actually divorced

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Today, on my metro ride home, I sat next to a woman who thought it was appropriate to continually scratch at her scalp and then eat her 'scalp pickings'. When I looked over at her hair, I could see scabs clumped together from her previous scratching sessions. FML

#16265806
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34928) - you deserved it (2841)

On 05/20/2011 at 11:17am - health - by kekeroos (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

kekeroos's comment about their FML

While it is a public system and I'm bound to encounter plenty of 'weird' people, I would still never expect a 50 something year old professional woman to be picking at her scalp and then eating whatever it is she picks out. And while none of her pickings ended up on me, one good head shake would have changed that very quickly. It would have been Christmas in my lap in May!

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Today, I threw a surprise birthday party for my 3 year old. There was music, snacks and lots of toys. My 3 year old is a cat. FML

#16231154
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13589) - you deserved it (46082)

On 05/17/2011 at 11:04pm - animals - by kaileigh10 -

kaileigh10's comment about their FML

I agree! How is a baby going to change my life. that was a stupid suggestion.

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Today, our cable, internet, and home phone got shut off because my mother-in-law decided that since we are moving, it was easier to not pay the bill rather than close the account. We're not moving for another month and the account was under my name. FML

#16204645
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29776) - you deserved it (6093)

On 05/16/2011 at 10:53am - money - by sakurabunny -

sakurabunny's comment about their FML

For the record: I gave her money to pay the bill since she works right next door to the company and i never got the notice's since she's the one who always gets the mail since my husband and I work full time and go to school full time. and before anyone asks what she did with the money, she used it to help pay the deposit on the condo she just moved into...AGAIN FML!!

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Today, I puked up a centipede. FML

#16126004
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52422) - you deserved it (7459)

On 05/11/2011 at 12:59am - health - by vaalcrawford - Canada (Ontario)

vaalcrawford's comment about their FML

it obvs got in my system while i was sleeping. and if theyre poisinous then thats why i had to puke. nd yes i have seen the human centipede, no it was an actual centipede. i cried when i saw it it was fucking disgusting.

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Today, in the subway, a man ran up to me, grabbed me, and starting hugging me. He wouldn't stop hugging me, and his grip was too tight. I don't know what's worst, basically being harassed, or not being able to remember the last time I was hugged. FML

#16112933
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31715) - you deserved it (3410)

On 05/09/2011 at 11:55pm - misc - by whyme (man) - Canada (Ontario)

sosad1818's comment about their FML

lol hi guys its the OP. Sorry for not being specific, but ye he was kinda crazy. And I tried to get him off me, but I didn't want to hurt him, so I just got off at the next spot.

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Today, an unpaid intern had his first day at my workplace of seven years. As a joke, my boss gave him the same challenge she gave me on my first day. The intern completed it in 37 minutes. We've always been told it's impossible. Guess we all have to start working harder. FML

#16104654
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11639) - you deserved it (29145)

On 05/09/2011 at 1:33pm - work - by 19apollo91 (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

19apollo91's comment about their FML

The challenge was to create a protocol for measuring the thickness of double and triple glazed windows (none of which open) around the company's building. Nothing to do with our actual jobs, most of us just figured it was a trick to get the new guys caught staring out of windows. He won't tell me his method...

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Today, I came across an old man sitting on the pavement with a bottle of beer in one hand. He was crying. I thought I would be a good Samaritan and see if he was okay. After 15 minutes of hearing about how much his life sucked, he mugged me. FML

#16025758
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33558) - you deserved it (9038)

On 05/02/2011 at 10:24pm - misc - by kimftwxox - United Kingdom

kimftwxox's comment about their FML

Yeah I know it was stupid, but I'm a good person.. I help work at social care and I hate seeing people upset. It was all in good intention, fair enough I maybe shouldn't have spoke to him and I deserved what I got I was only trying to be nice in the end. And saying I copied jesus' story is pathetic.

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Today, I got pulled over. Suspicious that I'd been drinking, the police officer made me walk a straight line and recite the alphabet. I failed both. I was completely sober. FML

#16021374
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30321) - you deserved it (23978)

On 05/02/2011 at 5:30pm - misc - by spekledworf - United States (Massachusetts)

spekledworf's comment about their FML

i had a panic attack and started to stutter out of nervousness, and just said fuck it and gave up

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