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FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML

#17918212
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24681) - you deserved it (4102)

On 10/06/2011 at 6:20am - misc - by kemando - Canada (Alberta)

kemando's comment about their FML

Damn straight. His name's rascal.

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Today, I came home from school and found my mother singing along to her latest investment, a compilation CD filled with heavy metal covers of ABBA classics. FML

#17918191
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18371) - you deserved it (3147)

On 10/06/2011 at 6:11am - misc - by kansah (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

kansah's comment about their FML

I am just going to make it clear, if the covers were decent I would be able to tolerate them and give my mum credit for having such excellent taste in music, however the covers are utterly horrible.

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Today, I was supposed to get married but we had to postpone as the best man fled the country. With the marriage certificate and vendor money. Not to mention the rings. FML

#17909341
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39721) - you deserved it (2987)

On 10/05/2011 at 2:23am - love - by princesspuffypan (woman) - South Africa

princesspuffypan's comment about their FML

This is my FML... yes I am married now and no the cops didn't catch him. The reason he was best man in the first place was due to family politics. We managed to have a small wedding shortly after but we still had to pay cost of cancellation.

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Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML

#17883689
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25592) - you deserved it (3682)

On 10/02/2011 at 1:15am - work - by katt_is_here (woman) - United States (Colorado)

katt_is_here's comment about their FML

Clarification time I guess. The wig was still in the bag as it was at the store. The pimp cane was another item sold at the store. I chose brevity in the FML for impact. No pun intended.

I should add that I was dressed as zombie Amy Winehouse at the time so I had a horrible beehive wig on. It was a very interesting evening.

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Today, I learned no matter how much your friends pressure you, you must never snort lines of curry powder. FML

#17876409
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7594) - you deserved it (60060)

On 10/01/2011 at 2:48am - health - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Avalanches's comment about their FML

I cried.

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Today, I timed my walk to work perfectly so that I avoided getting sprayed by the rotating sprinklers along the street. As soon as I successfully passed the last sprinkler, a bus sped by me, hit a puddle, and covered me head to toe in muddy water. FML

#17855624
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30913) - you deserved it (3014)

On 09/28/2011 at 1:54pm - misc - by Daralea (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Daralea's comment about their FML

They always do, and I don't know why. They even have it aimed at the sidewalks half the time.

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Today, my boyfriend bought me a gorgeous ring that I fell in love with. As he slid the ring on my finger for the first time, he started moving it up and down my finger and making loud sex sounds, completely ruining the romantic moment. FML

#17847729
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34946) - you deserved it (5898)

On 09/27/2011 at 1:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

katethegreatxx's comment about their FML

So, I'm the person that submitted this, I made an account to clear up confusion on my story. This wasn't an engagement ring, or a promise ring, just something to say that he loved me. The ring wasn't ridiculously expensive, and I'm grateful for it AND him, no matter what the price is. I wasn't complaining about him, more like ranting about what happened. I thought it was funny, and thought that other people might too. Trust me, I know that I'm very lucky, and fortunate to have a guy like him, even if he didn't take the moment seriously. But, that's what makes him special in my eyes, since he has a sense of humor. :)

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Today, a fly got stuck up my nose while I was giving a speech. FML

#17795106
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27546) - you deserved it (2237)

On 09/21/2011 at 11:25am - animals - by agent_awesome - United Kingdom

agent_awesome's comment about their FML

i popped it out by holding down the other nostril and blowing.it was awkward. but atleast i gave the people a story to tell. one day when its not so fresh i will look back and laugh...i hope

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Today, while at work, after reading more than 100 FMLs and moderating more than 500, I decided to write one of my own with the help of my boss, who had been standing next to me for over an hour. "How about being fired?" FML

#17793469
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9984) - you deserved it (52012)

On 09/21/2011 at 2:47am - work - by f_ck_U (man) - China (Zhejiang)

f_ck_U's comment about their FML

more than 100 means those confirmed and posted FMLs. That 500 are those unconfirmed which need you to click Y or N.

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Today, on my way to a concert, some guy told me I had cool sunglasses. I was about to thank him until he punched me in the face. I woke up with no sunglasses and no ticket. FML

#17770950
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31957) - you deserved it (2435)

On 09/18/2011 at 9:36am - misc - by incaseudidntkno - United States (Illinois)

incaseudidntkno's comment about their FML

They were Oil Rig Oakleys and my face still hurts. My friend also got punched in the nose haha.

See all the comments including 22 other original poster's reactions

Today, I will be sleeping in my aunt and uncle's living room. It is 90 degrees. There is an air conditioner but if you turn it on, the raccoons living in the wall will get pissed off and try to claw through the wall. Only five more nights sweating my balls off or imagining racoons having angry sex. FML

#17762422
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24417) - you deserved it (2389)

On 09/17/2011 at 2:56am - misc - by ironik970 - United States (Colorado)

ironik970's comment about their FML

OP here, I can kill a raccoon if it "comes after me" but all of the animal grunting and weird sounds emitting from the walls just paint an image of frightening animal sex in my mind. By the way its the only room on the floor so it's not coming from the room next door.

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Today, at 7am, I was woken up by a telemarketer. He tried to sell me a bedroom set containing "a comfortable pillow and goose feather cover". I was working the graveyard shift and had only just gotten to sleep an hour earlier. FML

#17744412
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23700) - you deserved it (2419)

On 09/14/2011 at 2:50pm - work - by kareltje (man) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

kareltje's comment about their FML

Can't they make a living during office hours? That would've given me 2 hours of sleep at least...

See all the comments including 9 other original poster's reactions



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