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FML, the follow-up

Spicy details and delicious explanations are on this section’s menu, which contains hundreds of stories commented on by their original posters. The people who share their mishaps return to bring you some clarifications. They tell us all about their FML, and it’s a real pleasure.

Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house to break up with him. After I left his house, I realized that my cell phone had fallen out of my pocket and onto his couch, where I had forgotten it. FML

#12783944
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17094) - you deserved it (15403)

On 08/28/2010 at 4:41am - misc - by averagepromedio (woman) - United States (Colorado)

averagepromedio's comment about their FML

Okay people, I guess I forgot to add at the end, "The wait at his front door while he got it for me was extremely awkward." Sheesh. And yes, I am very thankful that a couple of 18 year olds can actually be mature enough to handle a breakup well. I did it in person, and when I forgot my phone, he didn't mess with it, and I went back myself to get it. I found the situation more humorous than anything, so this post wasn't really like whining, just kind of like "Hmm, of all times something like this could happen, it just so happened to be the time I broke up with him. That sort of sucks, but it's a good story."

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Today, I superglued my headphones back together. They weren't dry before I put them back in my ears. FML

#12781520
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7737) - you deserved it (45933)

On 08/28/2010 at 1:14am - misc - by Lozza111 - New Zealand (Auckland)

Lozza111's comment about their FML

well all the other headphones that I have broke in like the first week and those ones had lasted 2 years so I wanted to keep them, plus, it's old superglue and I had let them dry for a couple of hours, although that doesn't mean I wasn't stupid to put them in my ears without checking. they didn't actually get stuck in there, it was just sticky and gross, the FML was that I was dumb enough to stick them in my ears without checking. =P

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Today, at a restaurant, I was joking around trying to make my friend laugh by pretending to be a ninja. I did this by putting my napkin in front of my face. I happened to look over at another table and saw that a lady wearing a burqa was giving me the most evil glare I have ever seen in my life. FML

#12768878
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22454) - you deserved it (18506)

On 08/27/2010 at 5:46am - misc - by CrushAdrenaline - Canada (Ontario)

CrushAdrenaline's comment about their FML

:D My FML actually got posted. Is it bad that I feel proud?

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Today, I fell down a flight of stairs while delivering a pizza, and severely sprained my ankle. The guy looked at me lying there, and shut the door in my face. I then got told to "Suck it up, Princess" by my manager. FML

#12753527
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23918) - you deserved it (2774)

On 08/26/2010 at 8:49am - misc - by earths_venus - Australia (New South Wales)

Earths_Venus's comment about their FML

Yeah I just got back from Emergency and I'll be off my feet for 2 days. My manager is a funny bastard, he heard me say that to someone else a few days before and decided to use it on me. He did end up helping me to my car and getting me an ice pack. No, I didn't get a tip from that asshole.

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Today, I found out that my brother is engaged to marry an ex-girlfriend of mine. This comes almost two months after my brother divorced ANOTHER ex-girlfriend of mine. FML

#12717798
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35194) - you deserved it (2806)

On 08/24/2010 at 8:19am - love - by groomsman (man) - United States (Michigan)

nullfactor's comment about their FML

This is the OP (just signed up, so I could comment). For those who say "who cares and why do you?", take a moment to see the big picture. That big picture contains two words: family reunions! Who in the world would want to see their ex-girlfriends at family reunions? Especially, since their new role in your life is that of a sister-in-law? I'd love to let bygones be bygones, but it's hard to do when they become your in-laws!

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Today, whilst I was working in McDonald's, a customer threw their Quarterpounder at me because it had pickles and he said he didn't want any pickles in his burger. I didn't even serve him. I'd just started my shift. FML

#12601290
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34146) - you deserved it (3981)

On 08/18/2010 at 6:31am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

T552's comment about their FML

I'm actually the OP of this post (I created this account recently so I can reply)

I am overqualified. I have 11 GCSE's, 3 A-levels one AS level and I'm on my way to Uni to get my honours.
I only work there part time to earn some money on the side so I can pay for living expenses when I go to Uni. So to all the people who seriously thought that I work there full time, you're wrong.

And to all the people who said the guy was fat, no. The customer wasn't fat XD He was a skinny guy with a horrible attitude. He even demanded that I apologise to him for getting his order wrong, even though I didn't even serve him.
My managers sorted him out.

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Today, I went on a blind date for coffee. He was smart, good looking, and friendly. While we were talking about our respective families it became abundantly clear that I have heard these stories before. I realized that 6 months earlier I had been dumped by his brother after sleeping with him. FML

#12492795
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13564) - you deserved it (21319)

On 08/13/2010 at 2:07am - intimacy - by Proudlyintp (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

proudlyintp's comment about their FML

I am the OP and am going to clarify the original post because in trying to keep to the letter limit, the tenses got confusing. I originally dated the brother "A" for a month and half. He has a very common last name. After we finally slept together he immediately went missing, which happened to be before I could meet a large portion of his family. Now 6 months later on a different blind date with brother "B" we were talking about respective families. Almost immediately the stories started to ring very familiar. He was telling a story about his brother who worked for him and it became abundantly clear that I had heard the same story only from a different perspective. Since there is a yuck factor with dating brothers and I am not really into creating family drama needlessly I am bowing out.

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Today, while tubing down the river, we stopped for lunch. I accidentally left my shoes on the sand when we left. I had to walk two miles through dense woods with no trail and no shoes. FML

#12246701
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9667) - you deserved it (26477)

On 08/01/2010 at 2:51pm - misc - by Intoxicunt - United States (Florida)

Intoxicunt's comment about their FML

I did NOT go back to get them! God, can you people NOT read? Read ALL of the other comments where I explain what happened. I'll repeat it. I did not go back for them. Again, I did not go back for them. How many times do I have to fucking say it!?!?

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Today, I came home from vacation to discover that one of my friends had broken into my house, painted my room a hideous color, ruined my hardwood floors with the paint, and left huge mess for me to clean. When I confronted her about it, she called me ungrateful. Everyone I know agrees with her. FML

#12181757
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37174) - you deserved it (3520)

On 07/29/2010 at 4:02am - misc - by annoyed (woman) - United States (Indiana)

BoondockSaint9's comment about their FML

Hey, this is the OP...just made an account to clarify this. She painted my room black, then tried to paint turquoise stripes over it. The hardwood floor might be fixable, yeah, but getting the black paint out of my white carpet...? Not so much. Not to mention she broke my patio door to get in...and she tried to poor the extra paint down the drain in my bathroom sink, so that's all clogged up. Needless to say, she's not my friend anymore...if I can get her to pay for the damages and a painter to fix my room, I won't press charges.

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Today, I had to apply medicine to my friend's spider bites, located on her ass crack. FML

#12180992
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27427) - you deserved it (6775)

On 07/29/2010 at 3:21am - health - by tonirene - United States (Oklahoma)

tonirene's comment about their FML

To answer all of Qs..
I am a straight girl, no she's not fat.
she just couldn't see it therefore it was difficult to apply medicine.
I did it because I am a good friend and she told me to put it up on FML lol.
turns out it wasn't a spider bite afterall though, she has a staph infection on he ass,

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Today, my live-in girlfriend and I broke up. She told me she can't leave because she has nowhere to go. I'm stuck with her until she finds a job and an apartment. FML

#12165294
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26053) - you deserved it (9570)

On 07/28/2010 at 12:53pm - love - by skizpow7 - United States

skizpow7's comment about their FML

It is my apartment, and we broke up mutually. she moved here from 50 miles away to live here and we'd been together two years. we just recently figured out that our relationship was great... right up until she moved in. we simply can't live together.

and I'm not gonna kick her out, totally rude. she gave up her life in her town to come live here, I don't expect her to be able to up and leave. she's only been here a month and doesn't know anyone close and her parents live 4 states away. it'll just be super awkward. FML

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Today, my husband left for a two-week trip. Last night he gave the dog a treat of steak fat and gristle. My treat? I am on bed rest with my pregnancy and helpless to stop the rancid dog farts that are silent and smell like a burning septic tank exploded. FML

#12061995
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31342) - you deserved it (3717)

On 07/23/2010 at 9:18am - animals - by areyouserious (woman) - United States (Texas)

fartingdogprego's comment about their FML

Thanks for those that understand! Hubby--great guy, went on this trip to get paternity leave later. Timing just sucks with bedrest (high blood pressure, just precaution, can't drive, walk the dog, clean, cook, work, etc) and a dummy move to give the dog food he's not used to. Texas is too hot to leave him outside. My mom helps in the am before work, and his mom is helping in the pm after work. Cooler with food they are making me and the laptop are making it bearable, and friends/hubby call all the time on the cell. Can get up to use the restroom as needed. Just sucks to be in bed or on the couch with a farting dog and not able to walk him and get some fresh air.

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Today, I learned that there's nothing quite like coming downstairs in a t-shirt and panties, only to discover your fiancé has a bunch of his friends over. FML

#11974509
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22421) - you deserved it (7449)

On 07/19/2010 at 12:38am - misc - by LaneyyenaL (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Laneyyenal's comment about their FML

I'm the OP and it wasn't a huge deal as you all are making it out to be for me. A friend told me I should post it here to see if it got published. I'm not fat, and the only hair I have is what's on my head...If I had known the guys it would have been different, but these were guys that I have never met before. And its easy to not hear what's going on downstairs when the TV is on and the guys are all getting high, so there's no extra voices going on. I don't generally parade around in little to no clothing...but to each their own. Way to make this a way bigger deal than it needs to be people...

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