Kids: Today, when I got home from work. My dad asked how my day was.... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By soontobestripper - 10/03/2016 05:03 - United States - Dublin

Today, when I got home from work. My dad asked how my day was. I told him work was long and I needed to go do my laundry. He informed me that he did it for me. Oh he did it alright. He put $500 worth of hand washed and line dry only clothes through the washer and dryer. They are crop tops now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 0

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

No comments yet.

Comments

No comments yet.

Keywords

Kids Music Names Work Customers Awkward Coworkers Bodyshaming Landlords Roommate Money Parents AITA Dogs Allergies Cute Singing Neighbours Embarrassing Accident Health Ironic Cats Animals Airport Love Sex Intimacy Relationship advice Cheating

The Top

Today, my daughter is not only an expert in escaping her diaper but also in leaving her mark on every surface possible. Today's masterpiece: a poop trail on the hotel room rug. It was like a modern art installation, but with a distinctive smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 376

You deserved it 171

Today, I went to the gym with two of my friends expecting to pay a guest fee but the cute guy working at the front desk let me in for free. On the way out after working out I started to flirt with him and he said, "Don't flatter yourself, I just let you in because I'm lazy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 704

You deserved it 16 738

The Top

Today, I downloaded an application for my phone that reads whatever you type out loud. I started making it say things like "You like it when daddy spanks your tight little ass don't you?" Just as the message was playing back out loud, my mom walked up the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 513

You deserved it 55 612

Today, I went to the supermarket and picked up some groceries, along with what I thought was a bag of chips. I ripped it open in the car and realized it was a bag of birdseed. As I spat out the birdseed through the car's open window and tried to clean the mess, a pigeon flew into my car and attacked me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 280

You deserved it 825

Today, when I dropped my 6-year-old daughter off at school, a little boy ran up to her so I asked his name. My daughter explained: "Oh, don't pay any attention to him, he's my slave. He's come to carry my bag. See you later, mom!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 447

You deserved it 5 515

Today, during divorce proceedings, I decided to have my kids DNA tested. Neither of my kids are mine. My daughter's real father is unknown but my son's DNA identifies him as related to me, but not as my son, so he’s more likely my nephew, meaning his dad is one of my brothers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 953

You deserved it 143

Today, I'm on a diet. I was compelled to start it when the only pet name my boyfriend could think of for me yesterday was, "My baby elephant." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 581

You deserved it 283

Today, I was home alone. It was very dark and so I went to turn on the lights, when I heard the sound of a gun loading. I dropped to the floor but never heard a gun fire. I got up and heard the sound again. When I got lights on, I discovered it was only my printer telling me it was out of paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 480

You deserved it 26 051