Animals: Today, there was a huge spider on my ceiling, so I grabbed a...

By lacsmac2 - 01/11/2015 14:10 - Australia

Today, there was a huge spider on my ceiling, so I grabbed a shoe to deal with it. Just as I jumped up to smush it, my idiot brother flicked the light off. I missed the spider, but it didn't miss my face as the impact caused it to fall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 611

You deserved it 2 672

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Same thing different taste

By jillydark6609 - 19/09/2010 06:21 - United States

Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 283

You deserved it 14 256

Leave spiders to chill

By Anonymous - 17/12/2020 14:07

Today, I saw a spider in my room. I got a piece of paper to try and put it outside. As I reached, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to smack where the spider was - my face. I fell on the floor disoriented. The spider got away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 727

You deserved it 316

Adapt, improvise, overcome

By Arthur B. - 24/09/2019 12:01

Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 347

You deserved it 456

He was just chillin'

By Anonymous - 04/07/2021 13:59

Today, I was taking a shower when I noticed the huge spider above my head. Now, being the smart person I am, I sprayed the water up at it, causing it to fall. Right on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 348

You deserved it 989

By eebie jeebies - 30/05/2016 15:31 - United States - Cypress

Today, a spider crawled across my arm. After a quick dance in a fit of panic, I managed to scramble onto my bed. I thought I would stand up to see if I could spot the spider and maybe kill it. I was then promptly knocked unconscious by my ceiling fan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 480

You deserved it 3 176

By spiderwoman - 15/04/2011 11:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 294

You deserved it 32 184

By Anonytard - 02/03/2014 22:38 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I tried to kill a spider by throwing a shoe at it. All it did was slice the spider's egg sac open, releasing all its babies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 700

You deserved it 15 123

By lexii - 05/05/2012 05:01 - United States

Today, while trying to kill a spider in my kitchen, I thought it would be wise to throw a bottle at it. The bottle hit the wall, bounced off the fridge and hit me in the face. The lucky spider crawled away, and is surely still laughing somewhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 739

You deserved it 30 880

By NaniNarcotic - 16/08/2011 10:17 - Australia

Today, I thought it'd be funny to knee my sister's ass as she was bending over. What I didn't realise was that she was trying to pick up a spider. In shock, she threw it in the air and it landed on my chest. I ran into a wall trying to get it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 881

You deserved it 73 460

By Anonymous - 14/03/2010 20:30 - United States

Today, while taking a shower, a spider fell from the ceiling onto my foot. I took down my shower head to wash it down the drain, and in the process, got soap in my eye and rammed my head into the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 653

You deserved it 8 334

lexiieeex3 32

Monday 2 November 2015 0:20

Did your brother flick the switch off on purpose? That would be a major dick move. You don't **** with people when spiders are involved.

katelng09 16

Monday 2 November 2015 0:17

Spiders are dicks

Comments

katelng09 16

Monday 2 November 2015 0:17

Spiders are dicks

krazy789 28

Monday 2 November 2015 0:58

Siblings are too

Adeptus_Astartes 22

Monday 2 November 2015 1:42

Spiders would say the same about us. At least they don't go around smashing humans.

UserError94 18

Monday 2 November 2015 2:43

Word

mds9986 24

Monday 2 November 2015 3:10

No they aren't. Spiders are extremely important to the environment and they rarely mess with humans. They just look scary and that's why people hate them.

LastResort318 14

Monday 2 November 2015 0:18

Did you at least kill the spider with your face?

KittyKatKyrish 15

Monday 2 November 2015 4:24

OHHHHHHHHHHH

UncleCaitlyn 21

Monday 2 November 2015 0:19

It must've been afraid of the dark

lexiieeex3 32

Monday 2 November 2015 0:20

Did your brother flick the switch off on purpose? That would be a major dick move. You don't **** with people when spiders are involved.

cheeeksss 29

Monday 2 November 2015 0:25

I feel like it has to be on purpose. Otherwise, brother's got some incredible timing.

lexiieeex3 32

Monday 2 November 2015 0:29

Nah I've had a few coincidental instances of fuckery where people have done things at inconvenient times and one of us ends up traumatized. I was just curious to see if that was the case or if it was done purposefully because the FML portrays the brother in a neutral light.