Intimacy, Health and Awkward: Today, on the bus, a man in his late 30s sat next to me. After...

By Anonymous - 13/06/2019 22:00

Today, on the bus, a man in his late 30s sat next to me. After a moment, he turned to me and said with a wink, "You must be ovulating, I can smell your vagina." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 186

You deserved it 351

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/09/2018 13:00

Today, I was sitting a full bus when a man seated himself next to me. After a few moments, he looked at me and said, "I can smell your vagina, you must be ovulating." I don't know if he was hitting on me or what but I couldn't race out of there fast enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 773

You deserved it 278

By Anonymous - 07/12/2010 04:53 - United States

Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted, put his hand under his butt to smell what it was like, and then sniffed it throughout the whole ride while glancing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 100

You deserved it 2 553

By scarlet - 09/05/2011 15:02 - Canada

Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 890

You deserved it 3 408

By Anonymous - 26/08/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 880

You deserved it 3 719

New creepypasta

By pokeballbra - 17/10/2011 05:44 - United States

Today, I had to sit on the bus next to a creepy guy. He began pestering me with overly-sexual statements, and finally I told him I had a boyfriend. He responded with, "Tell me his name so I can track him down, kill him, and hopefully take his place." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 096

You deserved it 4 078

By Anonymous - 10/02/2011 23:32 - United States

Today, I was on the bus heading home from school, when I noticed a ridiculously hot girl near me, checking me out. I was about to say something charmingly funny when I suddenly got a whiff of onions. Turns out she had turned around simply to catch the essence of her own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 146

You deserved it 4 792

By bridezilla - 05/07/2009 04:12 - Canada

Today, I was on a train when an old man standing next to me very obviously checked me out, caught my eye, and winked. He spent the next five minutes rubbing his penis against my leg. When I turned to tell him off, the train lurched, and the old man fell face first into my breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 482

You deserved it 6 852

By annabellatrix - 14/09/2015 18:20 - Hungary

Today, a pervert was visibly playing with himself right next to me on the train. Then on the bus. Then on the other bus I changed to in order to lose him. At least somebody's interested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 636

You deserved it 2 403

By marlow - 15/01/2009 02:25 - Canada

Today, the guy sitting beside me on the bus fell asleep and just drooled on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 857

You deserved it 2 712

Perfume Allergy Man strikes again!

By Lor - 09/10/2019 06:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, a woman got on the bus wearing extremely strong perfume and sat in the seat in front of me. The gentleman I was sitting next to began violently sneezing, so much so that he eventually sneeze-vomited all over my lap and backpack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 824

You deserved it 168

BurnInDemonFire 33

Thursday 20 September 2018 4:56

You should have punched him in the face, and asked how that smelled.

NPDclusterBaware 8

Thursday 13 June 2019 23:35

Gross and I bet all the YDIers are /r/niceguys

Comments

BurnInDemonFire 33

Thursday 20 September 2018 4:56

You should have punched him in the face, and asked how that smelled.

BurnInDemonFire 33

Saturday 15 June 2019 16:02

Another old post? I thought we were done with these?

Dthsapprntc 23

Thursday 13 June 2019 23:06

How to get girls to NOT like you 101.

Wadlaen 23

Thursday 13 June 2019 23:10

Well, was he right..?

NPDclusterBaware 8

Thursday 13 June 2019 23:35

Gross and I bet all the YDIers are /r/niceguys

rebelwithmouseyhair 18

Friday 14 June 2019 14:21

each with a really small one.

PenguinPal3017 19

Friday 14 June 2019 2:27

The nose knows!

adjwejaelwkdc 21

Friday 14 June 2019 4:50

Ew. Just.... ew..... [shudder]

Joshawott 21

Friday 14 June 2019 10:04

"That's odd, because I can only smell one c- here?"

RoyalSafari 26

Friday 14 June 2019 10:26

That's odd. I thought 'Multiple Miggs' had died in The Silence of the Lambs.

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Friday 14 June 2019 13:40

That's the moment when you start carrying mace.

AmbrosiaFan 18

Friday 14 June 2019 19:44

Well, were you ovulating?

Keywords

Love Music Cute TMI Work Gross Coworkers Racism Kids Scary Customers Technology Geek Gamers Miscellaneous Neighbours Relatable DIY Social Media Ironic Sex Awkward Cheating Animals Health Insects Insurance Plumbing Money Poopoo peepee

The Top

Today, I was at a frat band party dancing with my girl when I felt some liquid on my arm. Normally, I'll lick spilled drinks off my arms and being slightly intoxicated, I did. Then I realized it was chunky. The girl dancing next to us had puked everywhere and I licked her vomit off my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 020

You deserved it 115 204

Today, I got a warning at work for wearing my ear studs. Not only have I worn them the whole time for the last year I was here, I was unaware of this “rule.” I also was just told that the female employees are allowed to wear them, but men are not. “It looks unprofessional.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 478

You deserved it 134

The Top

Today, I came home to my boyfriend weighing a cup of shit on the kitchen scale. After I finished screaming in horror, he said he wanted to know how much his average dump weighed, so he could calculate how many pounds of shit he'd made in his adult life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 527

You deserved it 117

Today, I heard my roommate moaning my name in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 097

You deserved it 6 905

Today, my grandma was diagnosed with lung cancer. We're very close, and I called my boyfriend, really needing some support. I'd barely told him what had happened, when he replied, "Babe, I'm in the middle of a game here. Call me later." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 341

You deserved it 6 643

Today, I was in the grocery store buying a few things. A sales associate came over the intercom system saying, "Attention Safeway customers. If you drive a blue Subaru, it's rolling into 18th Ave." Everyone laughed except me. I forgot to set the brake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 723

You deserved it 48 525

Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 873

You deserved it 5 975

Today, I went to a bone and joint specialist because of excruciating back pain. Before the examination, the doctor told me that the possible reasons for the pain could be arthritis, sciatica, or scoliosis. After the examination, I found out that I have all three. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 797

You deserved it 244

Same thing different taste

New creepypasta

Perfume Allergy Man strikes again!

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