Love, Intimacy and Kids: Today, my son was finally born. He was the perfect weight, as...

By #MurrayShow - 27/02/2018 01:30

Today, my son was finally born. He was the perfect weight, as healthy as can be, and has his father’s dark, chocolate complexion. At least I’m guessing so, since both my wife and I are white. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 768

You deserved it 519

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 01/01/2009 03:45 - France

Today, my wife and I both have blond hair and blue eyes, we just had a red headed son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 964

You deserved it 9 191

Age difference

By Anonymous - 02/07/2021 10:01 - United States - Brunswick

Today, I took my newborn son to his one week weight check appointment. The pediatrician said, “OK, and he’s here today with his mom and big brother?” He thought my husband, who is 21 months older than me, was my son. How old do I look? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 548

You deserved it 179

The genetics expert has logged on

By Fucking moron - 27/03/2024 10:00 - United States

Today, I met my "grandson". Even though my son and his wife are both lily white, the child was clearly half-black. I pulled my son aside to have a word, but he said, "Her grandmother was black and she has recessive genes, it's really rare." I can't believe I raised this dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 585

You deserved it 374

Suspicious coincidence?

By Confused - 20/05/2023 15:00

Today, my wife had our first child. He's identical to her coworker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 952

You deserved it 130

Welcome to the world

By Anonymous - 14/02/2022 09:00 - United Kingdom - Preston

Today, I learned it is in fact possible to give birth despite having had no symptoms of pregnancy, including no weight gain. Our daughter made a surprise appearance this morning at 6 lbs exactly, and we are in no way ready. We don’t even have clothes for her. My husband is acting like he’s been concussed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 828

You deserved it 322

Classic Dave

By not the mama - 24/10/2020 02:01 - United States - Hesperia

Today, after years of trying, I got the wonderful news that my husband is going to be a father. Too bad I’m not the mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 651

You deserved it 86

By mickey1928 - 12/01/2010 13:10

Today, I took my wife and newborn baby girl home from the hospital. While waiting for the elevator, an elderly couple leaned over, saw our baby, and said, "Look, it's the fat kid that was in the nursery." My baby is six and a half pounds, and my wife hasn't stopped crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 960

You deserved it 2 896

By Diana - 05/07/2018 01:30

Today, I gave birth to my first son. He was 11 pounds and the labour lasted 22 hours. My husband was absent for 8 of those hours because he slipped when my water broke, cracked his head, and ended up in the ER next door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 851

You deserved it 368

Baby Daddy

By Anonymous - 15/06/2022 12:00

Today, and ever since she got pregnant, my girlfriend has been hinting that one of her great-grandfathers was black, so there’s a chance our son may be black too. I wasn’t suspicious before, but she has mentioned it so often I’m starting to think it’s less a great grandad and more a baby daddy issue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 555

You deserved it 129

Thanks, great feedback everyone!

By Anonymous - 27/01/2021 23:01

Today, after years of not meeting my partner's family, along with the new arrival of our daughter, we decided to travel to meet them all and introduce our bundle of joy. Instead of the usual welcoming committee, all they could go on about was whether or not my daughter was his because of how fair toned she is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 912

You deserved it 113

Mynxie 26

Wednesday 21 February 2018 6:00

Divorce her, found the real father, and dump them on him. Oh and make sure the cheating twit doesn't get a dime from you. Make the real dad pay for everything. Get out now.

Allie614032 34

Tuesday 27 February 2018 1:34

I'm so sorry you had to find out this way. Did your wife really think that you'd believe the baby was yours once you saw him? Or maybe she was just hoping you were the father. Terrible situation for you.

Comments

psycobunnymamafox 13

Tuesday 27 February 2018 4:42

Did you guys use IVF there could have been a mix up but some of the others could also be right one or both of you could have had a dark complexion

_ali__cat_ 14

Tuesday 27 February 2018 4:57

The real question here is did SHE even know prior?

DragonMaiden7 15

Tuesday 27 February 2018 6:18

You should really do a DNA test first. Genetics is a very complicated thing, and it’s not very likely two White people can have a dark skinned child, but it IS a possibility. Especially if you two aren’t very knowledgeable about deep roots of your family tree (not blaming you or your wife). You can wait to sign the birth certificate, and you only need a little blood for a very thorough test. It’s important to know right away, instead of throwing away your possible child and your marriage because of an uncertainty. It’s better to be 100% sure, than 95% or 90% sure.

Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20

Tuesday 27 February 2018 6:30

Just because your kid is black doesn't mean your wife cheated on you. Were either of the kids grandparents black?

dexter420 21

Tuesday 27 February 2018 6:58

Get a lawsuit for emotional distress

joonsson 21

Tuesday 27 February 2018 8:24

DNA test. If it confirms your suspicion dump her and try to make sure she gets as little as possible from you and cut her out of your life for good. Sorry that happened, can’t even imagine how angry I’d be.

TheJawsman 18

Tuesday 27 February 2018 8:27

Why the heck is this whole idea of the kid winning the genetic lottery getting liked so much? News flash, the kid isn't yours. Let your future ex-wife and the biological father pay for it. Don't be a sucker. Take her to court, get a proper paternity test done. No lawyer in their right mind would try to argue some genetic lottery win in court when they know a DNA test would easily prove otherwise.