Miscellaneous: Today, my mom tried to get me to shoplift. From the dollar store....

By Anonymous - 25/07/2011 00:21 - United States

Today, my mom tried to get me to shoplift. From the dollar store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 781

You deserved it 2 731

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Same thing different taste

By disappointment son - 19/05/2017 12:00

Today, I caught and kicked a shoplifter out of my store. The shoplifter was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 472

You deserved it 248

Get a move on!

By Anonymous - 09/06/2011 02:00 - United States

Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 621

You deserved it 5 143

By SilverAuthor - 29/07/2016 22:53 - United States - Detroit

Today, I slipped money into my mother's purse after she refused to let me pay for lunch. She caught me in the act and thought I was stealing money from her instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 333

You deserved it 2 063

By Anonymous - 16/08/2012 21:09 - United States

Today, while at the grocery store, I saw my mother. I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass. Not only was it not my mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 657

You deserved it 47 737

By FunTimes - 19/08/2019 04:00 - Canada

Today, my mom got drunk and tried to push me off a ladder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 673

You deserved it 121

By dude, where's my balls? :( - 22/12/2012 20:25 - United States - Anchorage

Today, my mom and I went to Best Buy for some Christmas shopping. She picked up some presents for me and told me not to look at what she was buying. When we got to the register, she didn't have enough money, and I ended up having to buy my own presents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 482

You deserved it 3 399

The definition of irony

By Rastaa_Reyes - 16/05/2019 23:52

Today, I went to Wal-Mart with my mom. She kept telling me to put my keys away so I wouldn't lose them. After a few times, I got annoyed and yelled at her. When we got back to her house, I realized I'd lost my keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 573

You deserved it 3 000

Thieves like us

By Anonymous - 21/01/2023 04:00

Today, my mom stole my holiday money because she found it “near her bag” in my kitchen and “assumed it was hers” and she must have “forgotten it was in there all this time.” I demanded it back, but she’d already spent it on hair, nails, shoes, and a date night with dad. She won’t pay me back either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 206

You deserved it 113

Scammers gonna scam

By sarahwittman - 13/06/2011 22:29 - United States

Today, my aunt and I went shopping. When we got to the store, she said she forgot her wallet, and I told her I would buy some things for her. When we were at the checkout, I was a dollar short. She said, "Oh, I'll get it!" and pulled out her wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 329

You deserved it 4 902

By disciplinaryaction - 21/11/2011 07:02 - United States

Today, a woman and her daughter came into the store I work at. The girl placed a pair of underpants on the counter, and confessed she had stolen them earlier. Assuming she had already heard a lecture, I simply thanked her for bringing them back. Her mom yelled at me for not yelling at her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 750

You deserved it 3 353

hannahtaskey 9

Monday 25 July 2011 8:36

Your mom is awesome.

BIEBERSLAYER 10

Monday 25 July 2011 8:37

gotta pinch them pennies

Comments

dearbarn 0

Monday 25 July 2011 8:44

get anything good?

howslife123 0

Monday 25 July 2011 9:14

glow sticks

danny1560 0

Monday 25 July 2011 9:26

pizza

howslife123 0

Monday 25 July 2011 9:28

balloons

Ionodemon1995 0

Monday 25 July 2011 10:05

skittles

AaronTkr 0

Monday 25 July 2011 10:23

silly string

warlockplayer19 5

Monday 25 July 2011 11:54

cheetos :D

OhSoBueno 0

Monday 25 July 2011 12:01

Shapeshifters.

TheRealHouse 7

Monday 25 July 2011 12:11

The cash register

Just2BMe 5

Monday 25 July 2011 8:45

go big or go home!

JenDanielle917 13

Monday 25 July 2011 8:45

Why didnt she do it herselff?

krispybacon4321 23

Saturday 14 February 2015 4:37

Op's mom's coat and pants were probably full of stolen stuff...

ILoveDaWorld 5

Monday 25 July 2011 8:46

haha loser

limeyemilyy 0

Monday 25 July 2011 8:47

Shame on her for making you do the dirty work... Try a more profitable store next time?

A100893 30

Monday 25 July 2011 8:48

Desperate times call for desperate measures I guess.... Time to be the responsible one OP.

zhightower 3

Monday 25 July 2011 8:48

what is there in a dollar store that is worth shoplifting???

jacob4848 4

Monday 25 July 2011 8:57

Umm silly string?

howslife123 0

Monday 25 July 2011 9:00

coloring books, balloons, tights xD, thongs.. lots of treasurable stuff

KendalKeller 3

Monday 25 July 2011 8:49

did you?

emogirlraves 0

Monday 25 July 2011 8:49

hahaha damn yo mama is so broke and ugly she can't strip so she shoplifts from the $1 tree

8sq 13

Monday 25 July 2011 8:50

I agree, your mom is kickass.

Keywords

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You deserved it 47 585

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I agree, your life sucks 11 153

You deserved it 68 062

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You deserved it 17 406

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I agree, your life sucks 873

You deserved it 111

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I agree, your life sucks 24 818

You deserved it 41 807

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I agree, your life sucks 31 396

You deserved it 5 032

Today, I was giving a strip tease over Skype to my boyfriend. My mom walked in mid-way through, took a long look at me, said hi to my boyfriend, and walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 713

You deserved it 50 085

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I agree, your life sucks 24 287

You deserved it 4 741

Same thing different taste

Get a move on!

The definition of irony

Thieves like us

Scammers gonna scam

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