Miscellaneous: Today, my mom "forgot" to put her SUV in park before she ran...

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By Anonymous - 04/04/2016 01:54 - United States - Toms River

Today, my mom "forgot" to put her SUV in park before she ran inside our house and it drove itself inside our garage, over my tool bench, and into a wall, all while side swiping the other wall. All because she had to "pee really bad". FML

I agree, your life sucks 3

You deserved it 0

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Today, after spending at least two hours on the phone every day for the past week, my health insurer I pay a huge monthly premium to agreed to cover my life-sustaining insulin. But they won't contribute to the cost until after I've paid an unaffordable deductible first. I'm going to die even though I'm insured. FML

I agree, your life sucks 511

You deserved it 81

Today, I emailed my boyfriend from work. Out of habit, I absent-mindedly entered my department into the "From" field. My boyfriend didn't notice when he replied. Now my entire department knows I want to "drop to my knees and suck him when I get home." And he plans to "finish on my face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 905

You deserved it 74 250

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Today, my parents started fighting at a restaurant. Embarrassed, I went to the restroom to get away and stayed in there for about 15 minutes, knowing how long their fights can last. When I came back, they were gone. They'd ditched me, and left me to walk several miles back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 033

You deserved it 4 685

Today, I had a dream that I met my celebrity crush. As I leant in to kiss him, he rejected me saying, “Woah no thanks.” Cool, I get rejected even in my dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 556

You deserved it 283

Today, I accidentally pulled out six of my eyelashes. It's noticeable. Very noticeable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 436

You deserved it 378

Today, while having sex for our first time, my boyfriend decided to test out a theory he heard about, that conversation during sex makes it more enjoyable. His way of doing it? He looked me straight in the eye and asked, "How 'bout them Brewers?" We're from Wisconsin. That's our local sports team. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 056

You deserved it 5 273

Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend to allow the cats to sleep with us on the bed. As we started to cuddle, one of the cats pissed right in between us. We are sleeping on the couch until the baking soda absorbs the smell in the mattress. I'll be sleeping there longer than that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 071

You deserved it 29 950

Today, I was on a plane. When my flight attendant brought me my drink, it had a lid and a straw. He told me, very seriously, "not to spill." No one else got a lid. I'm 18, and apparently I look spill-prone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 697

You deserved it 3 468