Love: Today, my friends thought it would be funny to rub Tabasco sauce... - FML

By dzisfml - 14/02/2010 08:42 - Canada

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to rub Tabasco sauce on my household toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 534

You deserved it 4 614

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Same thing different taste

By RIP Turd (peacebeuponit) - 17/12/2014 18:47 - Lebanon - Beirut

Today, I took a crap. When I stood up to admire my handiwork and flush, I noticed blood-red everywhere in the toilet. I freaked out like a little girl, thinking I was bleeding out of my ass. Then I noticed the ketchup packets my roommate had slipped under the seat to prank me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 887

You deserved it 6 630

Pranked

By dontevenassk - 12/06/2009 04:44 - Canada

Today, my friends decided it would be funny to scare me by tilting the portable street toilets while I was taking a dump in one of them. One of my friends accidentally rocked it too hard and it fell on the floor. They wouldn't even let me sit in the car after because I had shit all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 140

You deserved it 3 777

By Anonymous - 22/04/2013 18:33 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 905

You deserved it 8 669

Ring of fire

By Anonymous - 20/08/2022 12:00

Today, I did a big shit at work and found there was no toilet paper. I had to wipe my ass with disinfectant toilet seat wipes. It burns so bad, I can almost taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 739

You deserved it 265

By Anonymous - 15/06/2015 02:54 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was drying myself with a towel after a shower when I noticed a bad smell. After running out of toilet paper last night, one of my friends decided to use my clean towel to wipe herself instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 672

You deserved it 2 409

By Karmaisabitch - 18/05/2012 06:07 - United States - Boulder

Today, I wanted to prank my roommate. So, I thought it would be funny to take all the toilet paper out of our bathroom. She thought it would be funny to wipe with my cashmere sweater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 263

You deserved it 53 295

By Anonymous - 04/04/2011 05:26

Today, I had diarrhea in a public bathroom. When I was finished, I noticed that someone had pissed all over the toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 431

You deserved it 4 697

By unknown - 21/09/2011 12:40 - Philippines

Today, I thought it would be funny to put a few extra spoonfuls of sugar in my co-worker's coffee. He thought it would be funny to throw the boiling hot coffee over my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 623

You deserved it 39 145

Funny, huh?

By Anonymous - 20/04/2024 03:00 - United States - Chesapeake

Today, after having an upset stomach for two days, I thought it would be funny to rip a fart in front of two teen boys at the hardware store. It wasn’t until I crapped myself wearing shorts and it ran down my leg into my sock that I realized it wasn’t at all “funny.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 67

You deserved it 972

Happy Easter!

By Dummy - 01/04/2018 15:00

Today, I was stuck in the bathroom with no toilet paper in a family member’s house. I looked around and found baby wipes. I was saved! Unfortunately, they were actually Clorox wipes. The bleach gave me a chemical burn in my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 740

You deserved it 1 431

Next

Top comments

MermaidSongXOXO 6

Sunday 14 February 2010 16:05

And it was. Your point?

smbridges 15

Sunday 14 February 2010 16:11

yea i agree with #8 you should have seen the discoloration of ur tp i mean unless ur tp is usually orange!!

Comments

VanessaVander 2

Sunday 14 February 2010 16:10

wtf?

smbridges 15

Sunday 14 February 2010 16:11

yea i agree with #8 you should have seen the discoloration of ur tp i mean unless ur tp is usually orange!!

perdix 29

Sunday 14 February 2010 16:11

What a bunch of assholes -- to light up yours!

Gobsnoglin 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 16:13

How do you not notice bright red sauce stains on TP you are about to use? Bright red TP maybe?

pink_shades 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 16:13

that sucks. ouchieee

aDropOfSunshine 2

Sunday 14 February 2010 16:13

I know that taking an in-depth look at your toilet paper before you use it is something most people don't do, but if it's on the roll or in your hand and looks as though it has already been used, I'd say that's a red flag.

CallMeHush 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 16:18

Rub Icy/Hot on the toilet seat. When they stand up and the air hits it... WHOOSH! instant heat.

Ajjas013 6

Sunday 14 February 2010 17:50

I have one of those with Dora-- I mean, it glows in the dark.

Starfire22 5

Sunday 14 February 2010 16:26

ok, I'm thinking that the OP meant that thier friend took a jalepeno or something and rolled it on the toilet paper. which would then make sense, because if you just touch one of those hot peppers, you wouldn't notice that it was on your hand untill you, say, touch your eye and experience a burning sensation...

Starfire22 5

Sunday 14 February 2010 16:28

and it doesn't leave a residue like hot sauce would...

waterynuggets 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 16:51

Lol that could have been true, but unfortunately the OP fails miserably at making up FMLs.

Ajjas013 6

Sunday 14 February 2010 17:52

Chili Pepper extract is like 500X (Level up!) spicier. It's too bad they didn't use it :(

Starfire22 5

Sunday 14 February 2010 18:21

I have seen some fml's that have wording changed by the mods, but it couldbe that the OP did mean Tabasco sauce, and that they didn't see it untill they were going to wipe...

lissn 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 16:27

This kind of humour may not be of good tastes but GOD DAMN it IS funny!

xDConversexD 0

Sunday 14 February 2010 16:29

1st. LOL

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