Miscellaneous: Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated...

By fuck you dad - 30/03/2013 18:17 - Ireland - Carrickmacross

Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 507

You deserved it 55 550

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Catchphrase hell

By Anonymous - 06/09/2013 22:56 - United States

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it was. He just paused, turned to look me in the eye, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 959

You deserved it 20 510

By Anonymous - 22/08/2014 18:41 - United States - Doylestown

Today, my dad stopped me mid-sentence and said he wanted to punch me in the face and set me on fire for using the word "selfie". FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 112

You deserved it 42 996

By idonteven - 12/08/2013 20:04 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was watching a movie with my family in which a character said "Fuck you, dad." My dad then slapped me over the head to get my attention and said, "Never talk to your father like that." Okay, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 021

You deserved it 4 471

By Anonymous - 14/11/2015 11:47 - United States - Taunton

Today, I started to tell my step-dad about a funny video I came across online last night. He cut me off by saying "Yeah? Well I came across your mom's face last night!" then left for work with a shit-eating grin on his face. I could've gone the rest of my life without knowing that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 351

You deserved it 2 059

By Anonymous - 30/08/2015 15:44 - United States

Today, while I was pulling weeds, my dad thought it would be absolutely hilarious to yell "Hey, son!" then unload his gun at me when I turned around. After I'd screamed like a bitch and pissed myself, he broke down into hysterical laughter and said he'd loaded the gun with blanks. Fuck you, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 558

You deserved it 2 552

Crisis control

By Cuntlette - 11/04/2014 16:38 - Australia - Brighton

Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 564

You deserved it 3 370

By rowie1311 - 27/03/2011 18:09 - United Kingdom

Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 568

You deserved it 31 050

By Anonymous - 14/07/2013 19:37 - Brazil - Campinas

Today, while mourning my friend's recent passing, my dad told me to shut the fuck up because "worse things are going on in the world". FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 769

You deserved it 4 658

By Anonymous - 23/07/2016 23:04 - United States - Atlanta

Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 866

You deserved it 19 232

By Colin Jr. - 23/09/2015 13:24 - United States

Today, it's the third week of my dad's midlife crisis. So far he's blown half my college fund pimping out his piece of shit car, keeps texting me meme pictures, and keeps yelling "Savage!" and "Recked!" any time my mom makes a joke at anyone's expense. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 789

You deserved it 1 686

cherries62212 16

Sunday 31 March 2013 3:43

well... that escalated quickly...

JellyBalls 18

Sunday 31 March 2013 3:45

Respect your parents.

Comments

ArielTheMermaid 17

Sunday 31 March 2013 3:49

Epic dad is epic

HortonThelephant 15

Sunday 31 March 2013 3:51

I'll base the thumb response on my comment to determine whether or not my fellow FML-ers feel like that situation escalated quickly..

mckibben 7

Sunday 31 March 2013 7:21

that answers it doesn't it?

Mister_Triangle 21

Sunday 31 March 2013 12:38

I ******* hate it. Can't even enjoy the movie anymore because of it's overuse.

JBChristian 47

Sunday 31 March 2013 16:25

Well that escalated quickly...

solosohigh 15

Sunday 31 March 2013 3:52

your dad is a troll.

dmoran20 27

Sunday 31 March 2013 4:25

And every time someone has to mention the other person is trolling, that shit is worse than the well overused escalating quickly bullshit.

D1futbollar 8

Sunday 31 March 2013 3:57

Haha that's some funny shit!

stogeist 5

Sunday 31 March 2013 4:00

walked right into that one.

annie_nk 22

Sunday 31 March 2013 4:02

It's "Boy" not "Well".

BrookRae 19

Sunday 31 March 2013 4:23

I believe it's Well not Boy lol.

rg350dx 29

Sunday 31 March 2013 5:40

The actual quote is "Boy, that escalated quickly." Google that shit. Or watch the movie.

Syntax_fml 4

Monday 1 April 2013 13:53

Sad to see that the correction was so far down. But still, good on you for posting it.

iperson 11

Sunday 31 March 2013 4:18

Lmao

mrtonyanderson 20

Sunday 31 March 2013 4:20

Are you still living under his roof?

AnimeBitch 14

Sunday 31 March 2013 4:21

Yes.

attitude_angel 15

Sunday 31 March 2013 4:31

Its always better when your parents have a sense of humor :)

Keywords

Awkward Parents Relatable Work Job interview Love Social Media Jealousy Facebook Relationship advice Friends AITA Kids Annoying Roommate Shoes Music Names Customers Education Money Capitalism Weird Gamers Bodyshaming Coworkers Landlords Dogs Allergies Embarrassing

The Top

Today, I came home from college to find my favorite silk nightie that I'd left behind being modeled by Bernie, the family dog. Nobody will admit to who put it on him. I don't know what's worse, that my family is a bunch of assholes, or that my nightie is big enough to fit a Saint Bernard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 304

You deserved it 3 970

Today, there was a potluck at my girlfriend's house. I had a sour stomach, so I went to the bathroom to relieve myself. When I flushed, nothing happened. They had to call a plumber to fix the toilet filled with my crap. The whole family watched, noses plugged and faces cringed, looking at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 468

You deserved it 4 808

The Top

Today, I was swimming my routine laps at the gym's pool and a man came in and swam in the adjacent lane. While swimming freestyle, I smelled a really nasty fart. Not a minute later, he hurriedly left. I didn't realize what he had done until I saw "floating particles" in the water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 480

You deserved it 1 938

Today, I'm pretty sure I destroyed a friendship irreparably. I was trying to do a nice thing, but it backfired in an awful way. I know it's my fault. I really wanted to be that person's friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 532

You deserved it 304

Today, I couldn't have a conversation with my mother without it turning into yet another rehash of 20 years of bad family history, like a broken record. An hour later and I just want to jump out of the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 865

You deserved it 108

Today, my youngest started playing Fortnite. My oldest has been playing competitively for a couple of years. My youngest is now addicted and needs a new computer to run it at max settings. I hate Fortnite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 716

You deserved it 477

Today, my dad thought it was perfectly acceptable to ask my girlfriend how many guys she screwed before me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 068

You deserved it 1 793

Today, I got on the subway with a broken leg. A kind woman stood up and offered me her seat. Before I could sit down, a guy shoved past me and took it for himself. The woman and I pointed out my cast and crutches, and asked him to give up the seat. He responded by flipping us off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 328

You deserved it 3 258

Same thing different taste

Catchphrase hell

Crisis control

Top comments

Comments