Geek: Today, my dad got a new phone and put me on speed dial. I have...

By Anonymous - 20/10/2010 22:22 - United States

Today, my dad got a new phone and put me on speed dial. I have received several voice mails from him accidentally dialed. They are from him riding the train, in a meeting, having lunch, and, most recently, him taking a monstrous dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 346

You deserved it 3 319

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Same thing different taste

High hopes

By lyssanthamum - 09/04/2009 02:35 - United States

Today, on the train, I got excited when I suddenly noticed I had a missed call and voicemail from a boy I liked. With a grin on my face, I told my friend. My dad overheard and said, "Oh sweetie, he probably had the wrong number." The voicemail was blank. I texted him. The call was indeed an accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 611

You deserved it 4 442

Thanks dad…

By Anonymous - 26/09/2012 20:27 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I was on the toilet, when the girl I really like decided to call. I'd left my cellphone in my room and my dad answered. All he said was, "He's taking a shit. This might take a while." and hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 634

You deserved it 2 600

By Anonymous - 09/04/2009 18:48 - United States

Today, I got a missed call from my dad, who hasn't talked to me in months and has vowed not to have anything to do with me. I called him back excitedly and apologized for missing his call, and we had a 20-second conversation about how his phone accidentally dialed my number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 157

You deserved it 3 543

By wendtinmypants - 31/05/2014 15:05 - United States - Omaha

Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 894

You deserved it 9 212

Not on the weekend

By jtaylor94 - 21/07/2009 21:54 - Canada

Today, my dad's boss called our house and I answered. He said, "Is your dad home?" I replied, "I'll go check." I put the phone on mute and asked my dad if he wanted to talk to his boss. My dad says, "Does that asshole not have a life?" Turns out the phone wasn't on mute, it was on speaker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 343

You deserved it 42 709

Memory man

By Dad Fail - 07/02/2023 07:00 - United States

Today, my dad let me use his phone. Five minutes later, he had my mom call it because he thought he'd lost it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 683

You deserved it 116

Nice to know

By rejectedson - 15/10/2009 23:23 - United States

Today, my father got married. He left me a voicemail to tell me all about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 654

You deserved it 2 251

By birdisnottheword - 11/03/2015 13:55 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, the phone rang while I was on the toilet. I asked my 3-year-old daughter to answer it, only for her to loudly say, "Mommy's on the toilet pooping." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 926

You deserved it 8 876

By number2 - 18/10/2011 01:14 - United States

Today, while sitting on the toilet, my phone pocket dialed my boss's cell. He was in the next stall. He answered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 419

You deserved it 4 012

By Anonymous - 26/07/2009 17:00 - France

Today, I went to a funeral for my coworker's father. While there, my dad's cell phone rang and he left to answer it. I turned to my brother and said, "I can't believe he brought his cell phone!" He whispered, "I can't believe he's got coverage. This is a dead zone!" I laughed loudly. At a funeral. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 751

You deserved it 58 940

BassGirl 5

Thursday 21 October 2010 1:24

shit happens

MzMegs 20

Thursday 21 October 2010 1:23

Disgusting. :(

Comments

OwNowBrownCow 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 1:36

Your dad seems adventurous.

renvy 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 2:14

LOL. That's the word..

saywhaaat_01 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 1:38

grossss

atxvictor 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 6:32

wow your cute. and that's greatt

Sikk33 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 9:51

A 12 yr old picking up on a 21 yr old on FML.. Now that's what's cute haha

InDenial 6

Thursday 21 October 2010 12:04

And creepy...Eh, I've seen worse.

InDenial 6

Thursday 21 October 2010 12:06

But he'd surely be older than 12.

JacindasaurXD 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 1:42

lmaoo " monsterous!" haha thats nasty brah! its ok my mom always tells me about her turds:((

Lilllly_1316 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 1:44

woaaah, while I was typing mine, you posted this, and we said like the same thing. "nasty brah". Haha, epic. :)

samuel18 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 9:30

u guys must be long lost TWINS!!

Lilllly_1316 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 1:42

Tell him to take you off speed dial. cuz, that's nasty brah. :]

RKftw68 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 1:43

that's crappy

myagirl 0

Thursday 21 October 2010 1:58

maybe you should tell him about it and suggest him getting a lock on his phone????

Bikrbum 6

Thursday 21 October 2010 2:00

That is nasty!!

eternalsunlight 5

Thursday 21 October 2010 2:01

Pocket dialling= life's most embarrassing moments caught on voicemail. You really need to teach your dad how to lock his phone so that he won't accidentally dial you!!