Miscellaneous: Today, my brother yelled at me, calling me a "no-good fucking...

By cunts, cunts everywhere - 11/03/2013 11:57 - Australia

Today, my brother yelled at me, calling me a "no-good fucking whore", because I couldn't fix his laptop. The same laptop he threw on the floor after screaming "FUCKING HEAL MEEE!" at his game. As ever, my parents took his side, refusing to believe that I can't fix a cracked monitor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 387

You deserved it 2 779

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Same thing different taste

The blame game

By Shattered - 23/11/2022 02:00

Today, my brother got mad at me for breaking the screen on his phone. He'd already dropped it so many times that the whole screen was cracked to the point that you couldn't see anything on it, but for some reason, I am fully responsible for its destruction because I accidentally delivered the finishing blow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 673

You deserved it 170

Thanks, "Bro"

By probably on death row soon - 25/12/2015 18:32 - United States - Winter Park

Today, my brother "pranked" me by dropping my new laptop out my bedroom window. He'd set up a saran wrap safety net below to catch my laptop safely, but he didn't secure it well enough. My laptop is completely fucked and he won't accept responsibility because he didn't mean to break it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 181

You deserved it 1 594

By Anonymous - 10/12/2015 13:27 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I fell asleep while using my laptop. The next thing I know, it's 8am and my dad is screaming at me for posting "u skank-ass cunt-face" on my mom's Facebook timeline. I never made that post, but he won't believe me. My asshole brother, meanwhile, can't stop smirking at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 932

You deserved it 2 483

By fmlforreal - 15/10/2010 08:33 - Singapore

Today, I found my brother tampering with my laptop. He had changed the entire settings, in ways I don't even know how to fix. I finally had to get my mom to threaten him to change it back to its original setting. I'm 15. He's six and can barely get dressed by himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 167

You deserved it 9 612

Freeloadin' freewheelin'

By Anonymous - 26/02/2022 04:00

Today, my screw-up brother turned up at my house, expecting to move in rent free. Apparently, mom kicked him out and sent him to me. He's a freeloading demon, who's almost impossible to get rid of, so I told him to get lost and locked my door. Now my mom calls every 5 minutes to call me a selfish asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 122

You deserved it 88

By Scapegoat - 17/11/2018 13:30

Today, I found out that while I was at college, my brother downloaded three terabytes of porn on my laptop and blamed it on me. My parents believed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 387

You deserved it 286

By Micmicmic - 15/04/2017 04:00 - Belgium - Brussels

Today, my mom let my younger brother borrow my car. He managed to crash it through the garage door. While I was in another country. Somehow, I manage to get berated by my mom because I'm not doing enough to make my brother feel better about him having an accident involving my car and my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 750

You deserved it 343

By BlazefireSaber - 07/07/2015 03:59 - United States - Norfolk

Today, I'm sitting in the ER with a broken finger, all because I beat my little brother in a Wii game. He ran over and twisted my finger, saying, "Now how are you going to beat me, cunt?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 517

You deserved it 2 989

Golden child

By Anonymous - 28/01/2021 07:30 - New Zealand - Palmerston North

Today, I found out my junkie brother broke into my home, and stole mine AND my children's belongings whilst we were on holiday. I rang my mother to vent, only for her to blatantly defend him and insist I got it wrong. We caught him on camera, and now I'm being scolded for even thinking he would do such a thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 473

You deserved it 85

Double standards

By Anonymous - 21/02/2013 18:45 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, my bus got held up in traffic, so I arrived home about 15 minutes late. My mum bitched me out, accused me of sleeping around, and grounded me. All this while my brother raged at his video game in the other room, screaming stuff such as "EAT SHIT, YOU CUNTS!" with total impunity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 666

You deserved it 2 674

xoxokelsey11 5

Monday 11 March 2013 18:08

I love your name, ***** everywhere

daniel_dd31 13

Monday 11 March 2013 18:11

Let me guess... He's the younger one and you're the older one.

Comments

debbster7 18

Monday 11 March 2013 18:17

Pretend to do some voodoo magic on it and then cry when it doesn't work. He'll never ask you for help again.

Felling 14

Monday 11 March 2013 18:51

This is genius.

etchsanity1 11

Monday 11 March 2013 18:54

Pee on it and claim sleep urination ...

lochiamochia 25

Monday 11 March 2013 18:20

After he threw his laptop on the floor the first time, you should have calmly approached him, placed your palm on his forehead and said, "You are healed my son."

zenrael 21

Monday 11 March 2013 18:23

Knock his ******* lights out?

kurodansei 16

Monday 11 March 2013 18:25

well if you don't play games yourself. you can get back at him by convncing your parents that video game make kids violent.

RpiesSPIES 27

Monday 11 March 2013 19:52

Video Games don't make people violent, lag does.

perdix 29

Monday 11 March 2013 18:25

After spending thousands of dollars for you to get a so-called degree at ITT Tech or some such fly-by-night, is it too much to expect some free tech support? Order a new screen online and install it when it arrives, you no-good, ******* *****.

TrueTriage 16

Monday 11 March 2013 19:16

Perdix.. Are you the brother? I'm very curious who your siblings are. Wait a shocking cocking second! You're Bastard Jr! And your sibling must be Pleo. After he flew in from France just to see the estranged family.

dalink 24

Monday 11 March 2013 23:19

Solid inductive work, #39.

HeartOfLead 24

Tuesday 12 March 2013 4:59

I hope you know what True Triage is going to say next, Watson.

TrueTriage 16

Tuesday 12 March 2013 8:25

Solving this riddle of Internet family ties was... Elementary my dear Dalink

BEATLEJUICE98 4

Friday 8 November 2013 2:15

Wow dude you may have lost your screen but the way you bitch over computer games just lets me know you'll never lose your virginity

noelasis94 18

Monday 11 March 2013 18:35

Well use your magic wand to fix it, something that easy shouldn't be a struggle.

kinky44 28

Monday 11 March 2013 18:41

Hit him over the head with the laptop until he has similar damage. Then yell "Heal him!" at your parents.

Isoldael 27

Monday 11 March 2013 18:43

That's what you get for fixing their internet connection once. They always expect you to be able to fix anything after that. I made the same mistake...

kishorekumar_a 10

Monday 11 March 2013 19:20

Hey, I did not fix the internet connection. I just swictch off and switch on the modem. *looks pleadingly*

Ms_ValS 27

Monday 11 March 2013 18:48

Your parents spoil him & mistreat you. Leave them be with their delusions. Be thankful you're not the spoiled one who wouldn't be able to function as an adult.