Miscellaneous: Today, my boyfriend's parents visited us. When everyone was chatting...

By Anonymous - 06/04/2011 11:47 - Netherlands

Today, my boyfriend's parents visited us. When everyone was chatting in the room, I needed to go to the bathroom. I got up and wanted to walk away when I sneezed, and farted at the same time. I thought they didn't hear it, until my boyfriend's brother said: "That wasn't just a sneeze was it?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 955

You deserved it 5 466

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Same thing different taste

One way or another

By embarrassed - 08/10/2012 09:12 - Australia - Morphett Vale

Today, despite having a mild case of the flu, I visited my boyfriend's house and watched a movie with his parents. During the movie, I felt the sudden urge to sneeze. Trying to hold it in, I managed to do the loudest fart I've ever done in my life. Everyone heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 998

You deserved it 6 131

By SierraDiaz2097 - 23/03/2013 05:44 - United States - Vardaman

Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 615

You deserved it 9 660

Bursting out

By Myth Confirmed - 26/10/2023 16:00 - Philippines - Makati City

Today, I overheard my brother telling my son and his male cousins, who all think he's a cool uncle, that, "Only women can sneeze and fart at the same time." I decided to intervene, and gave him a scolding of a lifetime in front of them. Let's just say, I had to sneeze while in the middle of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 642

You deserved it 419

Blame the pooch

By anamota89 - 11/05/2012 09:33 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 336

You deserved it 32 285

By Anonymous - 30/09/2013 16:22 - United States - Union

Today, while in class, I had to sneeze. Not wanting to make a lot of noise, I held it in, only to instead let out a huge, long fart. Everyone, including the teacher, turned and stared at me intently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 356

You deserved it 8 109

Bad timing, dude

By Anonymous - 24/02/2021 07:59 - Australia

Today, in the middle of asking my girlfriend to marry me, I sneezed so hard that I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 006

You deserved it 139

Let it all out

By Anonymous - 25/03/2023 22:00 - Australia

Today, I was in a meeting with my boss and some new clients when I sensed that I was about to sneeze. I tried to hold it in, but ended up sneezing AND farting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 825

You deserved it 139

It's a gas gas gas

By Dani - 28/11/2011 12:34 - Reserved

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting a historical war bunker when I accidentally let rip a small fart. My boyfriend responded with a horribly loud, horrendous fart, and loudly announced, "This is war." There were people, lots of people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 370

You deserved it 9 464

By anonymous - 05/09/2014 16:17 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend was about to sneeze. To avoid getting his new tablet wet, he chose to sneeze right into my face instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 990

You deserved it 3 892

By Anonymous - 08/07/2012 11:26 - Australia

Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 107

You deserved it 3 496

lmaoatall 6

Wednesday 6 April 2011 19:27

and you say, nooo, open your ears! it was a snart.

cptmorgan15 2

Wednesday 6 April 2011 19:41

Haha, funny, but a dick move on his part.

Comments

AshlyNicole 0

Wednesday 6 April 2011 19:53

OMG I laughed so hard at this one!!!

Miss_Random 0

Wednesday 6 April 2011 20:02

Hopefully it wasn't a stinky fart.

phatdaddy62 23

Thursday 7 April 2011 5:17

stinky farts ate the funniest!

sweet_candy_ 17

Wednesday 6 April 2011 20:03

lol that must have been very akward.

nickcarles 0

Thursday 7 April 2011 5:04

And you are very beautiful

OMG_N3RD 0

Thursday 7 April 2011 6:54

I agree with 39

PeteyPablo12308 20

Wednesday 6 April 2011 20:33

Nothing breaks the ice like a nice loud butt-blaster. Way to go OP.

kyleb29 0

Wednesday 6 April 2011 20:42

lmao snart!!

you_freak 7

Wednesday 6 April 2011 20:56

That's a great story for the grandkids!

thatsmeh 0

Wednesday 6 April 2011 20:58

don't be douches! everyone farts dumbasses!

docscientist 9

Thursday 7 April 2011 0:43

Okay Rebecca Black.

emily14swim 0

Thursday 7 April 2011 2:10

hey. don't hate on rebecca Black

Frelling 0

Thursday 7 April 2011 5:06

I'm pretty sure they released that song/video to attain the world record in most hated individual.

TheWorldGreatest 8

Wednesday 6 April 2011 21:03

OMG I sure you denied it . lol

Gerblammo 0

Thursday 7 April 2011 0:33

If she denied it, it would indeed be proof that she supplied it.

jmanrollin 0

Wednesday 6 April 2011 21:25

haha can you really blame the kid.

jenaandtyler4eva 0

Wednesday 6 April 2011 21:31

haha goes to show you that everyone does fart and I would have been like damn that one hurt baaaad and then laugh hard cause I got no shame

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend refused to have sex with me, because my underwear are Fruit of the Loom instead of Hanes. According to her, since all real men wear Hanes, I'm unfit to have sex with her because I wear Fruit of the Loom and am therefore not a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 759

You deserved it 423

Today, I found out my dentist is retiring. This wouldn't be that big of a deal except that if we want to transfer our dental records to a new dentist we have to do it before he retires and there's a $30 processing fee per person. Three of us use that dentist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 76

The Top

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 110

You deserved it 7 367

Today, I decided to apply for a credit card to help build up my credit rating. It seemed smart since I'm a 24 year-old college graduate. I was rejected for not having a credit history. Being rejected turns out to hurt your credit history. The irony of my predicament is too great for words. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 645

You deserved it 2 894

Today, my new roommate showed me to my room, which I got a good deal on. I noticed a big black spot on the floor in the walk-in closet. When I asked, he said his last roommate committed suicide and he didn't want to pay to have the carpets professionally cleaned, hence the "good deal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 737

You deserved it 2 365

Today, none of my 500 Facebook friends responded to my status about "who wants to hang out during summer holidays?" I created an imaginary person on a different account to respond and ask me to hang out with him. I had a conversation on my status, with myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 002

You deserved it 46 390

Today, my friend was confiding all her problems to me over Skype. I pressed the mute button so I could let out a fart, forgetting I'd already muted it earlier. I broke several minutes of my own silence with a devastating wet one. Now she won't talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 969

You deserved it 14 350

Today, my husband woke up, tried walking to the bathroom, fell down, got back up and started peeing on the carpet. I’ve never seen him this drunk before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 267

You deserved it 164