Miscellaneous: Today, instead of reaching for some unhealthy food, I tried to...

By Anonymous - 10/02/2016 18:36 - United States - Milford

Today, instead of reaching for some unhealthy food, I tried to eat some dates instead. It was all fine until I bit one in half and saw a rather large, squirming maggot inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 317

You deserved it 1 994

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Rachel - 02/02/2009 22:00 - United States

Today, I bit into a cereal bar and thought the inside was oddly damp. I took a look at it and saw a maggot worm wriggling around. Its friend was in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 252

You deserved it 3 274

It was yummy

By lilviss - 11/12/2019 14:00 - Australia

Today, I found maggots in the ketchup on my sausage. Too bad I had already eaten half of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 905

You deserved it 251

By Anonymous - 11/07/2017 14:40 - United States - Higginsville

Today, I was feeling down and decided to eat one of my roommate's chocolate Pop-Tarts to cheer myself up. I took a big bite and thought it tasted "off". It was full of live maggots. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 232

You deserved it 2 647

By Magaña.i.am - 16/04/2019 16:00

Today, I was halfway through eating a what I though was a delicious sandwich, when I turned it over and saw nasty green mold on the bread. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 761

You deserved it 529

By Wormy - 11/05/2009 19:45 - United States

Today, I bit into a Reese's Cup that had been sitting on my desk for a while. As I did, half of a yellow meal worm fell out and landed in front of me, the other half was in my mouth. It was wiggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 208

You deserved it 30 426

By Anonymous - 16/04/2009 01:22 - United States

Today, I decided to snack on some MandM's. I saw my dog sniffing something and realized one of my MandM's had fallen on the floor. To prevent my dog from eating the chocolate, I hurriedly snatched the MandM off the ground and ate it. When I bit down, I realized it wasn't an MandM. It was a dead beetle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 900

You deserved it 60 073

By blowinchunks - 24/11/2009 06:00 - Canada

Today, I found a mealworm in my cornflakes. I had already finished most of the bowl. I didn't make it to the toilet to throw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 755

You deserved it 2 964

By Anonymous - 07/02/2014 18:51 - Mayotte - Mamoudzou

Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 276

You deserved it 3 661

By ticked - 06/10/2009 13:01 - Pakistan

Today, I was eating a packet of chips while watching TV. I saw a crumb on the table in front of me, so without thinking I picked it up and ate it. It wasn't a crumb. It was a tick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 554

You deserved it 47 982

By iHateWorms - 23/12/2009 03:52 - Australia

Today, while eating a sandwich, I saw a worm. Knowing that my friend always tries to scare me with fake worms and insects, I bit it to show her I knew it was fake. It was real. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 523

You deserved it 33 680

L_1781 18

Thursday 11 February 2016 0:34

'Out of DATE' get it? Cause they're dates... I am so sorry ;-;

brenton490 19

Thursday 11 February 2016 0:35

*Cleveland voice* Oh that's nasty...

Comments

theoldman 22

Thursday 11 February 2016 0:55

That made me gag just reading that.

BiGTiMeNeRD 29

Thursday 11 February 2016 0:55

You had a date alright, but it was with a maggot.

Sweetjessierose 8

Thursday 11 February 2016 1:03

At least it wasn't half a maggot?

TheKishwan 16

Thursday 11 February 2016 1:04

Sounds like a terrible date OP

gamecritic101 11

Thursday 11 February 2016 1:04

Good protein

914smv 18

Thursday 11 February 2016 1:07

ewww that's the bad thing about those...

Vitani_Verci 24

Thursday 11 February 2016 8:12

I didn't know dates regularly have maggots in them?

XboxSqueaker 15

Thursday 11 February 2016 1:19

I guess it's better than seeing half a maggot...

DevLucid 5

Thursday 11 February 2016 1:44

this is what happens when people eat healthy

Sansational_ 18

Thursday 11 February 2016 1:50

At least you had your eyes open. Blind dates suck.

BlueBaronBitch 22

Thursday 11 February 2016 4:56

Jesus Christ you really are sans

Spongegirlcs 17

Thursday 11 February 2016 1:52

*looks at dead monkey* Bad dates…

ryan9395 12

Thursday 11 February 2016 2:10

Dammit you beat me to it!

JohnnyPhoenix31 7

Thursday 11 February 2016 2:52

Took a little while but at least we have multiple people knowing that line...this makes me happy

Keywords

Music Names Kids Customers Work Bodyshaming Coworkers Awkward Money Roommate Landlords Dogs Allergies AITA Parents Embarrassing Cute Neighbours Singing Ironic Health Accident Animals Cats Love Airport Cheating Sex Intimacy Relationship advice

The Top

Today, I learned my dad is the kindest, most generous, hard-working soul anyone has ever met. He'll give someone the shirt off his back if they need help. Except for us, his immediate family, whom he screams and cusses at daily, expects to do everything ourselves, and thinks we're incompetent when we need help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 488

You deserved it 88

Today, after taking my girlfriend on a date, she invited me back to her place for "hot coffee and dessert." Excitedly, I said yes. When we got there, we actually had coffee and dessert. When I told her this wasn't what I'd had in mind, she kicked me out for being a pervert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 152

You deserved it 68 062

The Top

Today, I've been talking to a chick since early this year and she seems to like me a lot. We were both drinking heavily and were talking on the phone, having a really good time. Suddenly it hangs up. I get her back on the phone just a few minutes later only to hear her getting the bottom knocked out. So much for that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 783

You deserved it 270

Today, the drummer of my band briefly mentioned something about not being allowed into the United States, just as he left our last practice before our big tour in America. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 879

You deserved it 3 073

Today, I called the company with whom I had a job interview last week, which I thought went great, but hadn't heard back from. One of the interviewers claimed that I tried to grope her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 264

You deserved it 3 086

Today, my boyfriend blocked me from every form of contact. He told my friend that we broke up, but never told me. I still have his clothes in my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 160

You deserved it 204

Today, I was walking into work holding a coffee and a bunch of other things. My employee saw me and held the door. I was almost there when I dropped my coffee, tried to catch it, tripped over the curb and fell flat on my face. I heard the door close while still lying there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 647

You deserved it 189

Today, I found out that the money my boyfriend has "secretly" been putting away for the last two months is not for an engagement ring like I'd thought, but for a trip to Vegas I'm not invited to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 332

You deserved it 7 638

Same thing different taste

It was yummy

Top comments

Comments