Kids: Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs...

By beya - 31/08/2009 22:05 - Canada

Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs from his chicken pox and dropping them into my open mouth as I slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 93 974

You deserved it 5 873

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Same thing different taste

By life insurance for 1 - 30/05/2013 16:29 - United States - Encino

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 694

You deserved it 5 579

By Scabby - 11/04/2012 09:53 - United Kingdom - Manchester

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend pulling off scabs and eating them. My scabs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 488

You deserved it 3 638

By Lorena - 21/04/2012 19:26 - United States - Kapolei

Today, just three days into a much-needed vacation, my 5-year-old daughter has come down with chickenpox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 087

You deserved it 3 231

By Pimpleeater - 20/12/2011 07:45 - New Zealand

Today, I found out that, when mad at us, my son picks the tops off his shoulder-pimples and sprinkles them in our food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 457

You deserved it 5 669

By todaddy - 23/05/2014 19:32 - United Kingdom

Today, my 5-year-old son woke up early and ran into my bedroom to wake me up. Unfortunately, he did this by jumping onto my bed, slamming his knee into my balls in the process. I had to explain my tears of agony away by claiming I was just so happy to see him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 197

You deserved it 4 736

By sickmom - 21/01/2014 11:07 - United States - New Orleans

Today, I have the flu. I woke up to my son leaning over me, inches from my face, breathing in deeply. Apparently, he was trying to get sick so he could stay home from school. He's 15. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 616

You deserved it 5 519

By mafiaguy800 - 27/08/2019 14:00

Today, I woke up to see my four year-old brother with a sharpie, trying to play “Connect the Dots” with my acne. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 494

You deserved it 145

By Spotted - 18/02/2009 22:09 - Canada

Today, at Church, the little boy sitting behind me asked his mother if I had the chicken pox, because there were red dots all over my face. I've had bad acne since I was twelve. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 311

You deserved it 3 972

By ellieowenie - 29/07/2012 08:11 - Australia - Sydney

Today, my 4-year-old son cut half of my hair when I was asleep because he thought I would look better that way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 747

You deserved it 3 436

By BadLuck - 21/12/2015 11:45 - United Kingdom - Bicester

Today, four days before Christmas, I discovered a rash on my daughter's shoulder. The doctor took one look and said, "It's chicken pox. Merry Christmas." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 945

You deserved it 2 051

Fernmelder 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 1:37

that is nasty

crazychika 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 1:38

Ewwwww! What a little bugger! Yea... here's one reason why I'm NOT having kids :P

Comments

idkxd13 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 1:43

Lmfao the kid wins

laur20091 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 1:43

oh my god I'm so sorry!! that didn't even happen to me and I still think I puked a little...

coldplaylive2003 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 1:43

ur gonna turn into a chicken now

Beef_Sister 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 3:46

lmfaoo this made me laugh :)

jawesome91 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 4:44

# 68 u look like your ten

ithedarkone 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 1:43

Lol kids kids kids... I don't want kids but if my girl wanted kids she could only have one. But knowing my luck she'll probably have twins...

kmb13 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 1:44

oops, Fail, and fyl, :( / (:

livi120 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 1:44

Wow. What a bad time to be eating while on the comp, eh? o_o

lives_ppl 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 4:53

yeah. were you eating too? did your food come back up just when it was about to pass your throat?

danielleFML 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 1:45

this is an instance where thoroughly beating your child is morally okay. assuming you didn't teach him to be disgusting in the first place...

slamminalex1 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 1:46

This actually made me gag

littlemisslee 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 1:46

What. The. Fuuuuck?!

Wankster 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 1:46

Your son is a really funny kid ahahaha

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Today, while talking to my close female friend whose roommate I have a crush on, I learned that my crush shaves her bikini area into a heart shape. I also learned that my crush is apparently also asexual, so I have no chance with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 896

You deserved it 311

Today, while playing paintball, a shot ricocheted off a wall and slammed into my nuts. I told the other team I was out and tried to run out of the field, but as I was jogging to the door I was hit again in the balls. My friend saw this and dropped his gun, laughing. It hit me too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 013

You deserved it 701

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I agree, your life sucks 43 309

You deserved it 5 787

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I agree, your life sucks 42 115

You deserved it 4 447

Today, my boyfriend decided to use glow-in-the-dark body paint to make an arrow on his stomach pointing down. I guess he thought he'd "spice up" the way he always demands a blow job before sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 047

You deserved it 6 371

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I agree, your life sucks 18 559

You deserved it 1 139

Today, since my parents always told me that I was welcome to come home whenever I want or need, I decided to stop by. They'd changed the locks and wouldn't let me in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 489

You deserved it 329

Today, I bought a new, expensive face moisturizer. However, it smells like poop. I paid $20 dollars to make my face smell like shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 608

You deserved it 31 354

Same thing different taste

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