Dogs, Weird and Animals: Today, I went to get my friend a drink while she sat in the lounge...

By CheeseMonsters - 24/01/2010 12:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to get my friend a drink while she sat in the lounge watching TV with my dog. When I came back, I found her licking my dogs ears. She said he dared her to do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 471

You deserved it 3 432

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Same thing different taste

By thedogkisser - 06/06/2009 19:44 - United States

Today, when petting my friend's dog, I acted like I was going to make out with him. While I wasn't looking the dog stuck his entire tongue in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 090

You deserved it 84 181

By dogggg - 14/07/2014 02:10 - India - Pune

Today, I caught my dog drinking from the toilet. After yelling at him, his apology was licking my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 733

You deserved it 9 629

By Username - 02/08/2011 17:35 - United States

Today, I decided to play with my dog. I sat on the ground and whistled for him to come to me. I smiled when I saw him running at my happily. He sniffed me, turned around, lifted his leg and peed on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 473

You deserved it 5 294

By FrozenAnonymus - 14/07/2016 18:05 - Czech Republic - Prague

Today, I was laying on a couch with my dog watching TV when I heard my dog fart. I looked at her, she looked at me and started waving her tail, blowing it into my direction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 851

You deserved it 1 520

By anonamous - 12/03/2012 21:45 - United States

Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 159

You deserved it 9 119

Social science

By Josh - 16/07/2021 06:01 - United States

Today, a friend came over to meet my new dog. The dog got excited and accidentally peed on him. I went to the kitchen to get something to clean it up. When I came back, my new dog was covered in my friend's pee. My friend claimed that peeing on my dog "showed dominance." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 295

You deserved it 150

By Jimii Liu - 11/03/2012 01:41 - United States

Today, I had a date with a woman. She brought her dog along. Everytime I touched her, her jealous male dog began to bark and tried to bite me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 624

You deserved it 3 362

Yucky!

By theapplesleader - 23/12/2019 03:00 - United States - Washington

Today, I picked my dog up and nibbled her ear. On the tip of her ear was a large tick, which burst, sending blood into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 566

You deserved it 3 812

By Anonymous - 15/12/2013 06:47 - United States - Fresno

Today, I was playing with my dog, when she started sniffing my face. Jokingly, I got up and started to sniff her face back and asked "Yeah, how do you like that?" She replied by biting into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 362

You deserved it 35 751

By Lifeless - 01/06/2011 07:39 - United States

Today, I got into a staring contest with my dog. I actually cheered when I won. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 421

You deserved it 12 445

Blahp 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 20:11

Yay for weird friends!

nikkers 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 20:23

least the dog only dared her to lick its ears...

Comments

flashback.miss 28

Sunday 24 January 2010 20:35

lololol!!!! did the doggie tell her that he sees dead people...

Tkim32 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 20:35

Not an fml at all.

flashback.miss 28

Sunday 24 January 2010 20:36

Ik! it couldve been his balls.... take it and you like it sparky!!

zelly05 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 20:38

haha you're friend is crazy lol hot dog anyone!?!

jakeidk 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 20:49

THIS IS STUPID! SO WHAT!? WHO CARES!?

poudycat 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 21:09

gtfo FML

juliaaalove 8

Thursday 10 February 2011 11:46

Well, you obvously have no sense of humor..

ily1210 10

Sunday 24 January 2010 20:52

if she was joking, ok but if she was serious, thats sooo disgusting . nice friend su got

lookatstupid 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 20:58

What?

penelope_fml 2

Sunday 24 January 2010 20:59

... I read arse.

LemonStarship 5

Sunday 24 January 2010 21:24

Wow

Emilyroxx 3

Sunday 24 January 2010 21:37

My advice: Make new friends

Keywords

Friends Love Teenagers Intimacy Sex Embarrassing Revenge Food Work Awkward Parents Relatable Weird Miscellaneous Health Job interview Social Media Jealousy Facebook Relationship advice AITA Kids Annoying Roommate Shoes Music Names Customers Education Capitalism

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It's great to see you ! How was july ? Hot, sweaty, flirty ? How I miseed talking to you (and getting one or two comments if we're lucky enough). But let's not complain, a whole month welcoming artists for their second rounds who gave us brand new il...

I agree, your life sucks 7

You deserved it 8

Today, I love my husband to death and want sex all the time, meanwhile he claims he loves me too but constantly turns down sex and has even managed to negotiate a promise that I won’t ask for sex on special occasions like his birthday. What am I doing wrong? FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 889

You deserved it 341

The Top

Today, despite me not liking cats, which my wife knew, she got a cat anyway. Her cat went for a walk outside and was hit by a car. I rushed outside to help the cat but found she was already dead, and the culprit had driven away. When my wife found out that her cat was dead, she thought I'd killed her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 183

You deserved it 138

Today, I have a permanently injured right hand. Social media star Real86Hands has no hands. Guess which one of us has better penmanship? FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 438

Today, I was giving a friend a neck rub, when she started to breathe heavily. So I figured she was getting into it, so I started kissing her neck, she then turns around and says "Tell my room mate I'm having an asthma attack." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 056

You deserved it 61 306

Today, I lied to my crush telling him I can play the piano. To 'prove' it, I recorded a video on my phone of a girl playing a beautiful piece. After I sent it, I realized my mouse cursor was in the center of the page the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 392

You deserved it 62 207

Today, good news! The guitar I have been saving up for, for 5 months, finally arrived. It came inside a beautiful black and white case, and impossible to get into without the key. They didn't pack the key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 271

You deserved it 2 915

Today, I told my boyfriend of 3 years that I wanted to marry him someday. His response was, "Oh, OK, thanks." FML

I agree, your life sucks 799

You deserved it 165

Same thing different taste

Social science

Yucky!

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