Miscellaneous: Today, I went to bring my 92-year-old neighbor some cake we had...

By Nikki - 13/05/2015 00:33 - United States - Satellite Beach

Today, I went to bring my 92-year-old neighbor some cake we had just made. When I walked in, she was wearing pants. That's it. I stared blinking in shock for a few seconds before running away, yelling, "So sorry. I brought you cake. Real tired. Gonna sleep now. Bye." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 005

You deserved it 3 574

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 27/08/2009 19:28 - United States

Today, I lazily answered the door in my pajamas. It was my elderly neighbor asking to borrow a can opener. Despite the strange and unwarranted scowl she was giving me I obliged. It wasn't until after she had left that I notice my penis was completely sticking out through the flap in my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 948

You deserved it 21 601

By nerdygirl101 - 13/03/2010 05:27 - United States

Today, I woke up in pajamas I have never seen before. Usually, I sleep naked, and I live alone in a locked apartment. Then, the elderly woman next door asked for her nightgown back. Apparently, I sleep-walked and knocked on all the doors in my hallway repeatedly. I'm moving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 688

You deserved it 4 311

By Anonymous - 04/11/2010 23:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I spent two hours making a cake that I'd promised my class for weeks. I boarded the train to school, but soon dozed off. A few minutes later, I awoke with a start and noticed a chunk of the cake missing and a homeless man next to me with frosting around his mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 294

You deserved it 8 531

By Ihatemyjob - 18/03/2013 03:14 - United States - Vermilion

Today, at work, I walked in on a disoriented elderly woman eating nachos and cheese off the bathroom floor. She wasn't wearing any pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 630

You deserved it 3 116

By SURPRISE - 10/06/2009 00:13 - Canada

Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. To surprise her, I told her that I was going away on business, and could not be there on her birthday. When I show up at her house to surprise her with a present and cake, she opens the door in her underwear, beside a man in his boxers. She was surprised. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 615

You deserved it 6 819

By Rachael - 30/11/2012 07:29 - Australia

Today, I was woken up by my elderly neighbor banging on my door at 2am. She needed "urgent" assistance as she had forgotten how to turn her TV off. I'd just fallen asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 117

You deserved it 1 876

By Anonymous - 08/10/2009 04:24 - Canada

Today, I was helping my elderly landlady (75 years old) carry in her groceries. She said "Thanks" and then handed me a notice of eviction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 545

You deserved it 5 281

By Ashley J. - 01/03/2009 22:04 - United States

Today, my family gathered at my 96 year old great-grandmother's surprise birthday party that was my idea. When she walked in, we surprised her so much that she literally had a heart attack. She is now in the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 280

You deserved it 17 528

By unwanted - 26/11/2014 18:13 - Canada - Dollard-des-ormeaux

Today, I drove over an hour to my grandma's house for her birthday party. When she answered the door, her eyes went wide and she said angrily "No, not you!" and slammed the door shut in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 613

You deserved it 2 933

By nicholascageonyourface - 09/06/2013 05:13 - United States - Papillion

Today, I was delivering pizza. When I went up to the front door, an elderly lady answered. She was wearing a floral dress that went down to her shins and had a Nicolas Cage mask on with eye holes cut out. When I glanced behind her, I saw her cats had them too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 423

You deserved it 5 140

majesticous 29

Wednesday 13 May 2015 8:41

You didn't knock?

legendairy3000 16

Wednesday 13 May 2015 8:43

I see therapy in your future OP.

Comments

trellz17 19

Wednesday 13 May 2015 8:50

How did you get in?

wtffml1979 22

Thursday 14 May 2015 10:53

Through the door hahaha. Does it matter? I mean that's not the big picture here. More than likely they have a close relationship. Lil to close...

nekminnet 13

Wednesday 13 May 2015 9:10

A good bleach eyewash should fix that right up.

Hurley_fml 21

Wednesday 13 May 2015 9:28

Did you even knock?

cari_cat 19

Wednesday 13 May 2015 13:53

Do you even lift?

Exaspera 54

Wednesday 13 May 2015 9:41

Did she know you were coming? Sometimes folks do take off lots of clothing to change when they're not expecting company.

starile 19

Wednesday 13 May 2015 9:43

Do your boobs hang low? Do they wobble to and fro? Can you tie 'em in a knot, can you tie 'em in a bow? Can you throw them over your shoulder, like a Continental soldier? Do your boobs. Hang. Low?

nonsensical 26

Wednesday 13 May 2015 10:13

I WAS GOING TO SAY THISSSS but you beat me to it. I'll just sing along with you now, song is gonna be stuck in my head all day.

ughvictoriaxd 12

Wednesday 13 May 2015 16:54

??? first time I've heard of this... Stuck in my head now

nonsensical 26

Sunday 17 May 2015 11:37

how can it be stuck in your head if you've never heard the song?

shemademedoit 20

Wednesday 13 May 2015 11:27

well its her house. don't know if she barged in or if the granny just came out like that :0. she must of been in girls gone wild when she was young

gintwinsmoore 20

Wednesday 13 May 2015 12:46

This would've been funnier if OP had discovered that her neighbor had an upper body like a 20 yr old...lol!

gintwinsmoore 20

Wednesday 13 May 2015 12:53

I do recall a friend of mine who went to my church when he was in his mid 60s and I was going to his home for something and when I got there, he was parading around the house butt-ass naked with window shades up like I wasn't supposed to come over later. lol SO, that's what old folks do sometimes, or all the time, I don't know. But I can't wait to get to the "I don't care what you think or say about me" stage in my life. lol I'm 3/4 of the way there already. LOL!