By SOTS4335 - 16/05/2015 22:16 - United States - Maumelle

Today, I went to a domestic violence counseling group. I was the only male there, and I explained that my girlfriend punches me in the face in front of my kids. Everyone started laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks 55 018
You deserved it 3 629

SOTS4335 tells us more.

OP here. Two of my sisters actually ended up beating the shit out of my now ex-girlfriend and moving me and my kids in with them. Kinda hard to defend yourself when you have muscular dystrophy and you spend most of your day in a wheelchair. But Thank GOD I'm done with that psycho-bitch. And **** those assholes at that therapy session.

Top comments

JuliaaNoelle 26

I hate double standards. Abuse is abuse no matter what gender you are. Sorry OP :/

I hate when people think males can't be absurd

Comments

Why do you let her do that? You're the man!

It's exactly this kind of thinking that makes it hard for males to be taken seriously when they report abuse. If he was to defend himself, it could easily backfire and he'd be accused of abusing his girlfriend instead. Abuse is abuse, whether it's a female or a male doing the crime. OP shouldn't be shamed, it's not his fault and his gender shouldn't matter when seeking counselling. They shouldn't have laughed.

13 - because if it escalates she could say (or everyone would assume) that he hit her first and the authorities would believe her. and if the fight led to a break up the judge would give the kids to her cause "men are the stronger(abusive) ones" and he'd loose everything. if he has to go to a support group over it, then she is obviously pretty bad..

Oh, Concom. There's so much wrong with that sentence.

MattStro 23

Leave the group immediately. Find yourself a more positive group!

I smell breakup in the air, and unlike most breakups, this one would be a relief.

I hope she's gonna let him leave. Otherwise it will be scary. I'm so sorry OP.

He has kids with this woman. It's very hard for people to leave an abusive relationship, even more so in this situation because few people would side with him taking his kids over the mother having the kids, so if he wants to protect his kids he may stay - If he leaves she could start using her kids as a punching bag. Abusive relationships are extremely hard to get out of, it's not just a case of "breaking up" - abusers don't work like that.

@179 He said "my kids", rather than "our kids", so it sounds like the children are from a previous relationship, and she isn't the mother. Which would be even more reason to get the hell out (not that he needs any more reason).

Dump them! Sue them! You mean ex-group, right? There. Now that that's out of the way, let's have a real conversation about this problem. As much as I hate Twitter and Twats and Tweets, #istandwithdan might be a reasonable place to start.

A reasonable place to start would be a plane ticket and suitcase full of money.

Next time she hits you call the cops. Some people do not get the fact that men can be abused in relationships too. Men are less likely to report being abused too. It stinks that the support group would treat you that way OP. Find another support group if you can.

144 no that's terrible advice, no matter what stories you've heard of police inquests backfiring that should not stop you from reporting. If she's willing to hit OP how can he live with himself leaving children with her

It can happen. However, as long as he has the marks on him, and (unfortunately)the kids as witnesses he won't be arrested. Police have to be notified. What if they split up and go to court for custody? What if she decides to turn her anger on the kids? There needs to be a record of this type of behavior.

bsmallz3 12

This is what is wrong with society. No one in that room could put themselves in your shoes just because they were a different gender.

There's so many things wrong with this backwards ass society, always preach double standards but never practice it.

ouijacorn 9

That is an unacceptable response and I'm truly sorry that they couldn't take your situation seriously. It goes without saying that you should find a different group as soon as possible (as well as a different girlfriend).

It's not like they press charges when they get beaten up. And I'm going right to downvote hell for that one.

MzZombicidal 36

Wow, #287. You literally even knew better.

I think that is very wrong for them to laugh, sorry OP. People suck sometimes