Health: Today, I was watching a home video of when my mom was pregnant...

By wastedbaby - 04/07/2011 02:02 - United States

Today, I was watching a home video of when my mom was pregnant with me. She had a beer in her hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 736

You deserved it 3 764

Epic Easter: Chases and Chutes
From egg hunts gone wrong to unforgettable family dinners, Easter has never been so much fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By speed-dialing dr kevorkian - 27/02/2016 07:25 - United States - Two Rivers

Today, my mom came home heavily drunk. As I was taking care of her, she told me all about how I was a mistake. That didn't hurt nearly as much as when she told me she wishes I'd died during her pregnancy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 140

You deserved it 1 315

By Anonymous - 29/11/2013 08:23 - United States - Portland

Today, my mother posted a video of me giving birth, on Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 151

You deserved it 4 492

Slippery slope

By ur_life_dus_suck - 21/01/2016 13:08 - United States - Wayne

Today, my mom celebrated a year's sobriety by having a couple of beers with her boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 251

You deserved it 1 698

By Anonymous - 09/05/2014 23:57 - United States - Akron

Today, my mom got drunk and started crying, ranting about all the things she could have done in life if I hadn't been born. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 431

You deserved it 4 140

By kashish0711 - 02/08/2009 16:14 - India

Today, I was at home, my mom came and saw me holding what she thought was a glass of beer. She took the glass, threw it and slapped me for drinking it. I was drinking Apple Juice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 688

You deserved it 3 179

It's just liquid fun

By Anonymous - 30/12/2010 05:08 - United Kingdom

Today, I caught my mom trying to get secretly smashed out of her brain-box on booze at 8:00 a.m. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 026

You deserved it 3 021

By Anonymous - 12/12/2010 21:55 - United States

Today, I asked my mother why she didn't drink. She laughed and said, "The last time I drank was the night you were conceived. I didn't need any other disasters." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 239

You deserved it 4 583

By FunTimes - 19/08/2019 04:00 - Canada

Today, my mom got drunk and tried to push me off a ladder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 673

You deserved it 121

Late night customers are the worst

By viviham - 04/05/2012 12:08 - United States - Spring Branch

Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 862

You deserved it 2 345

By Anonymous - 04/03/2014 04:12 - United States - Woodland

Today, my mom left the house in the morning, leaving me alone. I called and I got no answer. Hours later, she finally answers one of my calls and tells me that she'd been in an AA meeting all this time. Happy, I tell her to come home. She came home drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 152

You deserved it 3 206

jellybelliez 0

Monday 4 July 2011 8:33

that's not cool

ilm350 7

Monday 4 July 2011 8:35

mom to be+beer= FML user hah

Comments

Lexi_Ray 5

Monday 4 July 2011 8:37

I'm pretty sure it didn't do any damage because you spelled this FML just fine

cenax27 0

Monday 4 July 2011 11:48

um I didnt know we were in a spelling bee

yummycupkake 0

Monday 4 July 2011 13:28

well you already have the golden medal

lexeous 4

Monday 4 July 2011 8:37

Sorry that one beer means FML. Don't be so sensitive.

knocking 0

Monday 4 July 2011 10:46

If they drank one on video, chances are they drank more. And even one drink could potentially cause problems. I mean the risk is very small, but still.

geeksaresexy 18

Monday 4 July 2011 11:32

No one said she drank it, she may have been holding it for someone else.

GuidoCheese 0

Monday 4 July 2011 8:38

Oh Gosh, f your life indeed. what if it's one of those 1% alcohol beers?

HoboPorn 1

Monday 4 July 2011 8:38

That explains so much.

hannahtaskey 9

Monday 4 July 2011 9:23

Your picture scared the crap out of me when I first glanced at it....

CryMoreFMLs 14

Monday 4 July 2011 21:24

The caption scared me more.... then i looked again and my face became my picture.

birdfreak 24

Monday 4 July 2011 8:39

0.0 that's not good. are you like okay or something I'm not sure what to ask

alex6946 10

Monday 4 July 2011 8:40

well at least you are okay :), maybe..

Molzen 3

Monday 4 July 2011 8:40

it's college, shit happens.

Stumblebum30 5

Monday 4 July 2011 9:33

OP didn't say anything about college. His mother could have been in her 30's for all we know.

aguin8 0

Monday 4 July 2011 8:41

hahahaha that made my day

cenax27 0

Monday 4 July 2011 12:09

all I see is 2 girls in your picture, which one r u?

anakaren_831 1

Monday 4 July 2011 8:42

That explains alot!

JennaMarie420 2

Monday 4 July 2011 8:45

does it explain a lot?

Keywords

Love Music Cute Coworkers TMI Work Gross Racism Customers Kids Scary Technology Geek Gamers Miscellaneous Neighbours Relatable DIY Social Media Ironic Cheating Sex Awkward Animals Health Insects Money Insurance Plumbing Farts

The Top

Today, my toxic daughter learned that yelling at a biker chick won’t just get her an argument, it will get her several broken bones and a concussion. The FML is that I now have to take care of her with her broken leg for six weeks. I hate her; she’s such a bitch to everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 275

Today, I was at a frat band party dancing with my girl when I felt some liquid on my arm. Normally, I'll lick spilled drinks off my arms and being slightly intoxicated, I did. Then I realized it was chunky. The girl dancing next to us had puked everywhere and I licked her vomit off my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 020

You deserved it 115 204

The Top

Today, my boss's incompetent, lazy son got another raise. He only started working here five months ago. Since then he's been promoted twice and given a Bentley as a company car. All this while company profits are in the shitter and the rest of us are facing a wave of layoffs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 225

You deserved it 2 080

Today, I fell asleep while my boyfriend and I were having sex. What's worse is that he didn't even notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 752

You deserved it 15 031

Today, I had a lady come up to me in a store just to tell me how bad my acne was and what remedies I should use. I got so embarrassed, all I could say was, "OK" and, "Thank you" until she left me alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 556

You deserved it 1 460

Today, my socks are labeled "100% wool". If you looked at them, though, you'd have to admit that the correct label, after being used for months, would have to read something like, "50% wool, 30% dog hair, 20% cat hair." FML

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 637

Today, I dislocated my elbow chasing my cat around the hardwood floors of my house in knee-high socks and wiping out going around a corner. The doctors suggested that I not tell people how it happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 522

You deserved it 21 271

Today, my dad got so drunk that he had an intense argument with the microwave, resulting in him threatening to ground me after I tried to calm him down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 810

You deserved it 1 973

Same thing different taste

Slippery slope

It's just liquid fun

Late night customers are the worst

Top comments

Comments