By shinay - 11/12/2016 14:50

Today, I was walking hand in hand with my partner when we met a friend of mine and his two kids. We talked a bit, and his son kept staring at us. The boy then asked me: “Is he your dad?” No, my partner is simply 19 years older than me. And my Oedipus complex is fine, thanks. FML
I agree, your life sucks 8 865
You deserved it 2 138

shinay_fml tells us more.

For all I know, Freud's Oedipus complex is the fundamental theory that describes the incestual-like attraction of a boy to his mother, and the resulting rivalry between the boy and his father, based on Oedipus myth. Also, Freud considered since his early work on the concept that there is a feminine Oedipus complex, parallel to the masculine one. However, the definition of the feminine Oedipus complex later evolved, and lost symmetry with the masculine one due to the different reaction of boys and girls to the castration anxiety. Girls, realising they have no phallus to conquer the mother, blame the mother for this, then turn to the father in hope for his phallus and love, therefore start acting like the mother to take her place by the father's side. Boys simply love their mother and fear their father will punish them for this, by castrating them. Finally, the Oedipus complex's principle is the desire for the opposite gender parent in both boys and girls case, simply the feminine version is a bit more tricky. Moreover, Freud's Oedipus complex is nowadays often considered as the primordial theory that describes the incest taboo, involving both genders. As for Jung's Electra complex, it is initially a new terminology to designate Freud's feminine Oedipus complex, as the Electra myth is more suitable for the daughter-father situation. This terminology has been rejected by Freud who considered that it was too ambiguous, because it could imply that masculine and feminine Oedipus complex follow the exact same process, perfectly mirrored, with no supplementary twisted stages in the feminine development. Electra complex is however used in neo-freudian theory where it designates the whole daughter-loves-the-father-and-hates-the-mother thing. Alors, the neo-freudian theory diverge from the original freudian one concerning the feminine Oedipus/Electra complex process. So it is true that Electra complex is specific to this anecdote. Nevertheless, Oedipus complex is still correct as it refers to both feminine and masculine issues with the opposite gender parental figure in Freud's work. N.b., I am not a native speaker, so please forgive me for the possible mistakes.

Top comments

OP, it would only be the Oedipus complex if you were male and wanted to sleep with my sexy mo—with your mom.

I'm sure the kid didn't mean anything by it. Children try to relate everything to what they know personally and they have to learn there's other ways of doing things via exposure. Hopefully in the end it was 'no harm done'.

Comments

Kid asks "is he your dad?" and you answer "he is my Daddy" :)))) Seriously, when I walk with my actual kids - either son or daughter - people tend to assume we are a couple. Thats also weird, especially in case with the daughter (I'm female).

"come on dad we don't need this YES I CALLED YOU DAD, GET A GRIP"

blobbertthethird 24

Mine if 17 years older than me and one time at a park, a 4 year old asked me if that was my grandpa.

Don't worry about it; I frequently am mistaken for my brother's father (I'm 12 years older than he).

A woman who wants her father has an Electra complex. They have a name for everything.

shinay 20

Yeah, there's a name for everything. I know it far to well in my domain. But isn't it a natural human tendency to simplify reality ? as long as we really know what we're really talking about, it can do no harm. Except simplifications as SMS language, which can cause eye bleeding.

I'm guessing you don't actually know that an Oedipus complex is only males and older females (that are or resemble the mother in a way). Know what the word means before you use it haha.

Actually you got it wrong, too. It only describes a son desiring sexual relations with his mother.

Age is but a number. Unless you're 24 and he's 89. Then, peeps might definitely give you REAL strange glances. Otherwise, let 'em stare. Who gives a SHIT!?

Please actually read the books before referencing them you look like a twit

It's also no longer just a play. Oedipus complex is the real name for a psychological phenomenon that's talked about in most high school and college psych courses, so it's possible to know the term independently of the literature.

I don't see why this is on this website...Key word was kids....Why would you expect a child to understand the age gap? Glad he is smart enough to notice the features that make your partner's age differentiate from yours. If you dyed your hair blue would you be offended if a child called you a Smurf? That's life....Please don't have children...I fear you will expect them to walk and talk from day 1.

Smurfs don't have blue hair, so I'd be offended if a kid was that ignorant about the Smurfs.

shinay 20

Well… as the kid was asking, his sister was sighing with a look of despair. She is around 2 years older than him and had immediately understood our relationship. The kid is just one of those who talk before thinking. A bit like you, I presume.

I dated a man who was 18 years to my senior but looked a bit older due to his grey hair. We went to breakfast on father's day and bam, he got "Happy Father's Day".