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Sometimes when you rub a dog's belly, even if you're nowhere near it, the red rocket makes an appearance.

Either your wife is 12 and you are a pedo or she doesn't understand dogs. Or you've jerked dogs off before. I'm thinking it's the last one because why the hell else would she assume that?


Maybe it isn't her husband but someone else she knew before who did that and she still remembers it.

So next time you call him a "good boy", she'll assume you're just dirty talking. And don't even try to put a collar on the poor thing; bondage is just too kinky. Oh, don't get me started on the "toys" you buy for him…

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