Intimacy: Today, I was playing an intense game of Flappy Bird. I was so... - FML

By Anonymous - 28/02/2014 22:26 - Russian Federation - Korol

Spicy

Today, I was playing an intense game of Flappy Bird. I was so excited at being about to beat my high score that I got a hard-on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 462

You deserved it 22 518

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By (not) fucked - 16/05/2014 16:01 - United States - Kingsville

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend decided that we won't be having any more sex until I beat her ridiculously high score on Flappy Bird. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 752

You deserved it 8 249

By bobo - 24/04/2011 01:02 - Canada

Today, I played Angry Birds for two hours. I got so into the game, I failed to remember that I was sitting on a public toilet. I only realized this when the janitor came to check on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 062

You deserved it 52 946

By Danny - 28/05/2012 18:02 - Ireland - Dublin

Spicy

Today, I realised that my body has its own masturbation cycle; while I was out shopping, I heard the intro music to my room-mate's favourite video game, and popped an uncontrollable boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 276

You deserved it 5 768

Guitar ****

By massachusettsan - 25/06/2014 00:07 - United States - Monomoy Island

Spicy

Today, I got the same feeling in my chest when I orgasmed as when I hit a hard section in Guitar Hero. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 606

You deserved it 8 912

By Anonymous - 20/06/2009 11:13 - Switzerland

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 801

You deserved it 97 655

By Rosie - 13/06/2012 16:07 - Germany - Wesel

Spicy

Today, I woke up to the sight of my boyfriend playing a game on my iPhone with his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 366

You deserved it 5 242

By BejeweledJizz - 05/11/2016 12:29

Spicy

Today, after weeks of being addicted to Bejeweled Blitz, I couldn't stop thinking about it while having sex with my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 898

You deserved it 4 850

Vaporeon?

By me. - 07/05/2012 20:38 - Canada - Orillia

Spicy

Today, I got an inconvenient erection while at my girlfriends house, so I tried to think of something stupid to get rid of it. I tried thinking of Pokémon, which actually made me harder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 275

You deserved it 12 162

By ThePopeMan - 17/03/2009 17:42 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she started moaning and breathing heavily. I thought she was getting hot and was about to cum. Unfortunetly, she soon said, "I'm bored, let's play a board game." She was sighing, not moaning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 143

You deserved it 23 109

By CandyCrushAddict - 21/09/2013 15:09 - United States - Wilson

Spicy

Today, while having sex with my wife, my Candy Crush addiction hit me full force, and all I could do was think about possible moves I could make in the level I'm stuck on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 388

You deserved it 51 088

Next

Top comments

LifeAlertTwerk 14

Saturday 1 March 2014 5:17

It sounds like you weren't "flappy" anymore!

chelsearenaeee 16

Saturday 1 March 2014 5:16

Sounds like a pipe did get in your way ;)

Comments

wickedalwayswins 7

Saturday 1 March 2014 5:27

Flappy Bird? more like "Fapping My Bird!"

flufee2 27

Saturday 1 March 2014 5:32

You just went from flappy bird to hard bird!

kevinnicki4life 9

Saturday 1 March 2014 5:35

Fappy Bird

Michaelgf 13

Saturday 1 March 2014 5:38

This would be a YDI if it wasn't for flappy bird.

pensacolalady 10

Saturday 1 March 2014 5:50

Not Flappy Bird! You ruined it for the rest of us! :-)

azyjazy713 11

Saturday 1 March 2014 5:50

Flappy Bird: UNCUT! 0.0

htownpostman 16

Saturday 1 March 2014 5:52

u need to get out more..

JBChristian 47

Saturday 1 March 2014 14:23

And we have a hidden comment streak breaker!

ber4fun13 10

Saturday 1 March 2014 6:18

Too bad you can't download that app anymore.

JBChristian 47

Saturday 1 March 2014 14:26

You can download the app. •AppStore •Updates •Purchase History •Type "Flappy Bird" And Flappy bird should come flapping to the top. This only works if you bought the app before it was removed from the AppStore.

StiffPvtParts 43

Sunday 2 March 2014 4:21

you can also download it from The Pirate Bay :3

Mr_canerr 5

Saturday 1 March 2014 6:19

your life seriously sucks

Mr_canerr 5

Saturday 1 March 2014 6:28

sounds like you played flappy something else, I stead of flappy bird lol

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9

Keywords

Work Awkward Parents Relatable Job interview Jealousy Social Media Love Facebook Relationship advice Friends Kids AITA Annoying Roommate Shoes Names Music Customers Education Capitalism Money Gamers Weird Bodyshaming Coworkers Landlords Dogs Allergies Singing

The Top

Today, it's only been two months since my daughter has owned her home and now she wants to move back to my house because she lost her job and can’t afford the mortgage, plus she got pregnant off a one-night stand and needs my help with the baby. Bang goes my plans for a quiet retirement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 503

You deserved it 109

Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 608

You deserved it 5 760

The Top

Today, I found out that even though my girlfriend of 3 years believes sex before marriage or even me just jacking off is a big no, doing online strip-shows for money is a big yes for her. Both times that I've proposed, she claimed she isn't "ready" for marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 594

You deserved it 9 555

Today, my teacher made the class do Origami. As a disabled and very ham-fisted individual, I was the only one who struggled, while everyone else seemed to get it effortlessly. I started getting extremely upset as it just did not work, and the teacher would not understand just how impossible it is for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 136

Today, I came home upset about the sexism in my work place. I just wanted to be alone, but my husband insisted we talk about it. I noticed he kept looking over and one of his hands was moving. He was playing video games the entire time I was spilling my guts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 075

You deserved it 198

Today, my OCD reached a new high when I used a correction pen to white-out an eyelash which was photocopied onto every single page of my reading material. I did it because the eyelash was too distracting and I couldn't finish reading the article without the urge to rip it into shreds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 198

You deserved it 5 353

Today, I witnessed a robbery as a teenager ran out of a Walgreens with stolen goods in his hands. The manager was running after him. Trying to be helpful, I pulled forward to block the thief from getting away. The cops showed up and arrested me for hitting a pedestrian. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 659

You deserved it 5 206

Today, I woke up to find my new roommate staring straight at me. She then went on to say, "I love how you sleep," and continued to stare. I live in a residence off campus and I've already changed roommates twice this year. I'm stuck with a person who stares at me sleep for the next two years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 450

You deserved it 3 904