Intimacy: Today, I was finally all set to lose my virginity. My girlfriend...

By fuck you, Odin, FUCK YOU - 03/03/2014 22:35 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was finally all set to lose my virginity. My girlfriend pushed me onto the bed and pulled off my underwear. She then made a face as if she'd just sucked on a lemon, and got up and left without a word. I haven't heard from her since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 305

You deserved it 9 613

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

No good

By :(( - 28/09/2013 21:24 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner, and have to leave in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 404

You deserved it 8 024

By Anonymous - 02/05/2015 02:22 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 002

You deserved it 4 133

By Perdito_Coño - 05/09/2014 20:55 - Australia - Quakers Hill

Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. Unfortunately, she started fake-moaning like a pornstar before I even entered her, totally killing the mood and my boner. She swore she hadn't moaned, accused me of not finding her attractive enough, and angrily left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 739

You deserved it 7 610

A tale as old as time

By flopsy - 03/12/2010 16:19 - Australia

Today, I was about to lose my virginity. I couldn't get it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 403

You deserved it 11 353

By Scorned - 16/09/2018 06:00

Today, as things were getting hot with my girlfriend, it came up that I'm a virgin. She broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 835

You deserved it 344

By Anonymous - 04/02/2013 17:17 - United States - Durham

Today, my girlfriend lost her virginity. I still have mine, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 402

You deserved it 3 889

By EliseV - 03/11/2014 18:56 - United States - Chino Hills

Today, I lost my virginity. In the middle of it, he just gave up and said he wasn't in the mood anymore. Then I had to listen about his past failed relationships for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 944

You deserved it 5 999

By checkup - 15/07/2012 00:50 - United Kingdom - Redditch

Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 276

You deserved it 5 073

By Lady Vulva - 19/09/2015 02:56

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 938

You deserved it 3 064

By ohai ur hawt, wanna fuzzzZzZZzzZzz - 04/04/2014 23:20 - Mexico - Mexico

Today, I met a really nice girl at a club, and we went back to my place. I was finally going to lose my virginity, but just as she started kissing me, I panicked and ended up fainting. When I came to, I was still clothed, and she was long gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 500

You deserved it 13 096

thomcmoore 23

Tuesday 4 March 2014 1:33

Yeah...FYL brother

1tsmenoah 20

Tuesday 4 March 2014 1:34

You dodged a bullet there, you'll find someone who cares only for who you are.

Comments

steelerguy43 21

Tuesday 4 March 2014 1:38

Sucks for you

sayhey22 19

Tuesday 4 March 2014 1:59

No, nothing was sucked

jblumz 15

Tuesday 4 March 2014 4:10

I wish there was a button, any button, that could express how you felt. Oh, wait, there is...

schwaka 17

Tuesday 4 March 2014 5:47

If only there was some way to express how you feel about someone else's comment...oh wait there is.

Schizomaniac 24

Tuesday 4 March 2014 8:51

If only there was some way to express how you feel about how someone else feels about someone else's comment. Oh wait there is..

Pleonasm 35

Tuesday 4 March 2014 9:37

Meta-expression.

worldclassrager 39

Tuesday 4 March 2014 19:34

I think an echo is a good word as well

Willibobs 33

Tuesday 4 March 2014 1:39

I think the face is indicative of a nasty smell down south

leroyjenkins006 10

Tuesday 4 March 2014 1:40

Smegma

rosenkrieger223 21

Tuesday 4 March 2014 15:04

I had a feeling someone was gonna go there at some point..

The_Big_Boss 20

Tuesday 4 March 2014 1:40

Either your penis is deformed or you had a full on jungle

XCrazyMofo2010X 17

Tuesday 4 March 2014 1:53

Or smelled like one

DrownedMyFish 18

Tuesday 4 March 2014 2:31

Or the sight of OP's junk was so amazing that she was lost for words and had to leave until she could think of words to describe such a magnificent sight!