By fuck fof and die dad - 20/11/2014 19:48 - Germany - Kiel

Spicy
Today, I've tried to have a quiet jack off four times, only for my dad to knock on my bedroom door within seconds and say "STOP IT." every single time. Now I'm too paranoid to even function. FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 549
You deserved it 9 438
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

ojskyguy 8

Search your room for hidden surveillance.

482 2
michaelm1290 23

Tell your dad to beat it.

481 3

Comments

MrSassypants 32

OP, I don't mean to alarm you but you misspelled "off" in your username. Unless you're telling your dad to **** somebody named "fof".

9 41
sunnyray812 42

I'm more concerned that the last part of the username says "die dad." O.o

35 8
seemo82 19

or maybe "fof" is a beast that u die just right after u **** it

1 6
AriettaX 15

guess you'll have to "knock" it off instead of whack it off! get it? knock? ....... haha

25 15
Enslaved 36

Dad: "Son, how many times do I have to tell you that if you keep masturbating you'll go blind?" Son: "Umm.... I'm over here dad."

103 6
tony1891 22

would you be considered a master baiter then?

1 18
Marcella1016 31

If his dad lured him to catch him on purpose, and was great at it, he'd be a master masturbator baiter.

17 1
tehstarchild 16

If you don't succeed.Try,try again

22 3
JuliusSeizure 18

Look him dead in the eyes and finish like a beast. Assert your dominance. Or do the danger wank: Yell "DADDDD!" and then the challenge is to finish and clean up before he gets upstairs to your room.

55 7
Kodaline_fml 6

Kinda like whack off olympics hahaha I wanna see this happen once.

1 0
hippodankamus 22

There's a simple solution here: ********** later

12 1
bearstyle22 11

Should of chose sleight of hand perk instead.

3 11
mosquito19 14

stop doing that in your room. your room will smell like jiz.

1 18
23lf 16

If that was true, my room would smell like so much semen I get quarantined.

10 1