Love: Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend... - FML

By wendtinmypants - 31/05/2014 15:05 - United States - Omaha

Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 894

You deserved it 9 212

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
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Same thing different taste

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By Anonymous - 10/11/2014 14:28 - Germany - Berlin

Today, I thought I felt my cellphone vibrating. Turned out it was just my girlfriend letting out a vicious fart against my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 599

You deserved it 5 799

By ShitHappens - 24/10/2011 05:04 - United States

Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 563

You deserved it 44 709

By StinkyandStupid - 15/03/2012 17:49 - United States

Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 650

You deserved it 38 117

Thanks dad…

By Anonymous - 26/09/2012 20:27 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I was on the toilet, when the girl I really like decided to call. I'd left my cellphone in my room and my dad answered. All he said was, "He's taking a shit. This might take a while." and hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 635

You deserved it 2 600

Gassy

By MuteNToot - 26/02/2015 21:17

Today, my friend was confiding all her problems to me over Skype. I pressed the mute button so I could let out a fart, forgetting I'd already muted it earlier. I broke several minutes of my own silence with a devastating wet one. Now she won't talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 969

You deserved it 14 350

Blame the pooch

By anamota89 - 11/05/2012 09:33 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 336

You deserved it 32 285

By birdisnottheword - 11/03/2015 13:55 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, the phone rang while I was on the toilet. I asked my 3-year-old daughter to answer it, only for her to loudly say, "Mommy's on the toilet pooping." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 927

You deserved it 8 876

Close quarters

By smellay - 14/04/2020 23:00

Today, I had to shit really bad while I was in bed with my girlfriend. Luckily she was sleeping. I didn’t want to be obvious, so I closed all the doors, crept into the bathroom and sat on the toilet. I accidentally let out the loudest fart. I got a text saying, “Walls are thin, you good?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 840

You deserved it 378

By Anon - 25/08/2015 10:10 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I took a phone call in the bathroom, since the rest of the house was too noisy. I sat down on the toilet and waited while they put me on hold. After a while, I must have forgotten the lid was down and my pants were still on, because I started peeing myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 633

You deserved it 9 112

By CHStennis_4 - 03/09/2011 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 295

You deserved it 3 863

Next

Top comments

TheDrifter 23

Saturday 31 May 2014 21:14

I hate when that happens. At least when I'm doing it on purpose I can fart a catchy tune.

SkyDog 9

Saturday 31 May 2014 21:28

I thought that was "shitty situation".

Comments

Aliakatherin 19

Saturday 31 May 2014 21:37

She should be more impressed than grossed out, four minutes is a long time;)

zandalee 19

Sunday 1 June 2014 4:23

I know right! That's skill right there!

lxry11 4

Tuesday 3 June 2014 16:49

Absolutely!

lgeezy 7

Saturday 31 May 2014 21:37

I got the acoustics updated for my toilet in case that ever happens

NannerAirCraft 3

Saturday 31 May 2014 21:40

Maybe you should put your phone in your front pocket?

EvilLittleMan 23

Saturday 31 May 2014 21:42

OP, ask Snookums to post this audio on YouTube and then update FML.

lylotrezor 20

Saturday 31 May 2014 21:52

You farted for four minutes?

RedPillSucks 31

Saturday 31 May 2014 22:06

I'm thinking it wasn't all at once.

boshbish 14

Saturday 31 May 2014 21:52

Everyone passes gas. Its not as if you farted in her face. Accident. I wouldn't say FYL though. Ive heard my boyfriend do worse and just laughed. No biggie

Martinez0285 28

Saturday 31 May 2014 22:08

Ahh the sounds of love

cwaziemamma 16

Saturday 31 May 2014 22:14

Could be worse, you could've had a fart marathon during sex

tweetypie 18

Saturday 31 May 2014 22:36

I don't understand this. Were you sitting on the toilet with your pants pulled up or was your phone attached to your ass cheeks while you sat on the toilet?

SamCat 21

Sunday 1 June 2014 1:30

i think he butt dialed her and then pulled the pants down to take a dump.

fmlrulesBolt 14

Saturday 31 May 2014 22:37

Hahahaha this is awesome brilliant

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You deserved it 39 830

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You deserved it 13 042

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You deserved it 697

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