Today, I took my family out on my new boat to celebrate the Fourth...

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By Fish food - 04/07/2017 22:32 - United States - Coplay

Today, I took my family out on my new boat to celebrate the Fourth of July. Along with fireworks, my brother brought a half stick of dynamite. Guess who's $40,000 boat is now at the bottom of the lake? FML

I agree, your life sucks 92

You deserved it 10

Epic Easter: Chases and Chutes
From egg hunts gone wrong to unforgettable family dinners, Easter has never been so much fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

No comments yet.

Comments

No comments yet.

Keywords

Insurance Awkward Plumbing Money Relatable Cheating Suspicious AITA Relationship advice Love Weird First Dates Marriage Poopoo peepee Gross Health Mental health Cars Death Parenting Family Kids Miscellaneous Transportation Capitalism My ex Instagram Social Media Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I found out I’m pregnant and got excited. We’d never discussed kids before since we’ve only been dating a year, but I was so happy… until I told him, and his face just fell. I left after he drank himself unconscious and I’m now at my mum's house FML

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 553

Today, I had a check-up with my dermatologist. When I took off my pants, she noticed a small mark on my penis and was concerned. I had to inform her that it was not in fact a mole, but a bruise from getting it stuck in a Snapple bottle two days prior to the check-up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 358

You deserved it 78 405

The Top

Today, the girl I've been dating asked me to describe her body. I said "Thin an toned but curvy in all the right places." I then asked her the same question to which she replied, "I don't know, you know I'm always drunk when we're together." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 462

You deserved it 4 620

Today, it's just another day where my dad sits in the same spot in the kitchen for 12-16 hours, only to very slowly sip on alcohol and nibble on food. If it’s his day off, that’s his excuse. If he got off work, then it’s also his excuse. Twenty odd years of this. How can someone spend their entire life sitting in one spot? FML

I agree, your life sucks 878

You deserved it 160

Today, I saw a spider crawling on my new roommate's cheek, so I told her to stand still so that I could flick it off. Several long seconds of flicking made me realize that it wasn't a spider at all. I had been flicking her hairy mole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 732

You deserved it 34 944

Today, my girlfriend learned that calling someone a "stupid bitch" under your breath while staring right at them from six feet away works very differently in my house than at hers. She also learned my sister has one hell of a punch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 698

You deserved it 12 556

Today, I was so lonely, I tried to get into bed noiselessly while pretending I had a boyfriend asleep in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 548

You deserved it 6 239

Today, I wanted to show my teenage daughter what we did when I was her age. We used to breakdance, so I stuck on a Grandmaster Flash track, and tried some old moves on the living room floor. I spun out of control, smacked my head into a wall and pulled a back muscle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 331

You deserved it 41 193