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You SHOULD get counselling. Both of you. No matter which one of you is 'right' about the situation, it sounds like there's a serious imbalance in your relationship. Maybe she's too distant and doesn't invest enough in the relationship, maybe your expectations are unrealistic and you're too dependent on your wife. It's most likely some kind of mixture of both, but it's important to remember that while your perspective feels real and valid to you, it might not to your partner. It sounds like both

Hard to judge from that short tale, but getting 100% from someone, even your spouse, means you have to deal with 200% of problems, expectations, experiences etc. Depending on how mentally stable you are, this can be quite a weight to carry. Maybe try to have an open conversation about that.

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Hard to judge from that short tale, but getting 100% from someone, even your spouse, means you have to deal with 200% of problems, expectations, experiences etc. Depending on how mentally stable you are, this can be quite a weight to carry. Maybe try to have an open conversation about that.

By  species4872

That's just sad mate, keep your chin up ok.

Relationships can only truly work if both halves give everything their all. If you're doing everything, and she's doing nothing, it's time for a change. She needs to be willing to work just as hard as you do on things. It may be beneficial for you both to take some marriage counseling together, so that you can come to an understanding where you're both happy.

You SHOULD get counselling. Both of you. No matter which one of you is 'right' about the situation, it sounds like there's a serious imbalance in your relationship. Maybe she's too distant and doesn't invest enough in the relationship, maybe your expectations are unrealistic and you're too dependent on your wife. It's most likely some kind of mixture of both, but it's important to remember that while your perspective feels real and valid to you, it might not to your partner. It sounds like both

Why are you telling her this now that you're married? You should have dumped this on her while you were dating. She doesn't want to be your mommy.

Hey! OP's wife here. I thought I'd add a bit of context. Several of you made pretty impressive guesses on the situation. He can be needy. I tend to be independent and, yes, at times too involved with projects and non-relationship things. We were seeing someone for marital counseling to work through these things a while back. The reason that stopped is because I got sick. It started with migraines once a week, then three times a week. Then they just stopped going away. I've been bedridden with

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Hello! So cool that you're speaking up... I was guessing that because it reminds me of my SO. I'm pretty independant (and like it that way) which sometimes leaves him with the impression that I have nothing to take care of anyway and kind of expects me to take on his responsibilites as well. I never mean to hurt him when I tell him that I can't do that, but I'm his partner not his mother and each of us have to deal with certain things on our own. We can support each other, but not completely rel

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It certainly has its challenges... sometimes it can feel like you're a drained battery, and it can be hard to communicate what you need at that point. And sometimes it's hard to explain the difference between rejection and needing space. That said, some good has come out of all of this. He's been better about respecting my boundaries (I don't like to be touched when I'm in pain, his first instinct is to give reassuring pats and snuggles, that sort of thing). He's been taking great care of me wh

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OP. First, I regret that this ended up on here. I wrote it when I was very upset and I've been hoping it wouldn't get published ever since. Hearing my wife's opinion on here shows me that we've had a great miscommunication. I was feeling very hurt by differing commitment levels. I was saying she had 100% of me, and it hurt me that she's still not sure she's going to stick around in the marriage. I was shocked that she seemingly was rejecting my commitment to her, but it's clear she interpreted w

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Hey, it may not be such a bad thing that this got published. Embarrassing, yes, but look: already you got her point of view when it seems like you weren't understanding. And obviously she didn't fully understand your point of view either. Now you got both sides out for you both to read. And while FML is more of an entertainment site, it seems like a lot of people have experienced similar issues (I know I have) and may even have some good advice for you both to consider. No shame man, looks like

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OP and wife, you two sound like wonderful people who really care about each other! I'm sorry things are so difficult for you right now, and I hope they get better!

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