Miscellaneous: Today, I started training for a charity boxing match. When I...

By DJ - 07/04/2013 18:52 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I started training for a charity boxing match. When I got home and walked through the door, my dad punched me in the stomach to test my reaction time. As I lay on the floor trying to catch my breath, he said my reaction time was "terrible". FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 602

You deserved it 5 874

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Same thing different taste

By theregoesmyspermcount - 02/08/2009 22:45 - United States

Today, my 250 lb ex-Marine dad announced he was going to start randomly punching me in the crotch, without warning, to "improve my reflexes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 839

You deserved it 5 697

Freaked

By Anonymous - 12/06/2023 15:00

Today, my dad joked he’d have to fight my boyfriend to find out if he’s worthy. My boyfriend grew up abused by his dad and older brothers, and has a powerful instinct to fight back. My dad is now out cold on the floor and my boyfriend is in the corner rocking back and forth and crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 242

You deserved it 148

Iron Man

By Anonymous - 14/12/2009 23:46 - United States

Today, my little brother punched me in the stomach. When I didn't flinch and he asked me why, I thought it would be funny to tell him I was Iron Man and that nothing could hurt me. Two seconds later, he took a step back and kicked me in the nuts as hard as he could. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 673

You deserved it 38 459

By J - 11/02/2016 15:44 - Malta - Piet?

Today, my sister punched me in the face. My dad was actually annoyed with me when I told him. He said I'll never be a "real man" if I can't take a hit from a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 293

You deserved it 3 291

Badass

By Anonymous - 12/04/2016 12:29 - United States - Saint Louis

Today, my friend invited me to his boxing club for the first time. Since I'm somewhat short and scrawny-looking, he was worried that the workout would be too difficult for me. I waved him off and told him that I was tougher than I looked. Five minutes into class, I sprained my ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 948

You deserved it 4 935

By Anonymous - 29/08/2015 17:08 - Canada - Gatineau

Today, I blacked out while hugging my dad. I woke up a minute later on the floor with my dad telling me to, "quit being lazy and get up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 250

You deserved it 1 556

Jedi mind trick

By Anonymous - 02/10/2019 04:00

Today, my stepdad punched me in the face after I told him I hated him. He and my mom came in 10 minutes later to try to convince me that I'd made it up in my head that he'd punched me. My face was still red. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 250

You deserved it 197

By stupidprankster - 09/03/2012 10:10 - United States

Today, I thought it would be funny to scare my dad for once, since he has scared me for fun dozens of times. It would have been funny, had he not punched me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 487

You deserved it 7 477

By Chris - 03/04/2011 17:41 - United States

Today, I was awoken by my dad yelling into my ear. In shock, I jumped up off the couch, and came smashing down into the coffee table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 646

You deserved it 4 120

By Kassiopia - 14/11/2009 12:35 - United States

Today, my Dad decided to take his medicine before eating. He passed out with his face in a plate of chocolate cake. He wasn't responsive so I called the paramedics. When he got to the hospital, the doctor asked him if he knew why he was there. He replied, "Because my stupid daughter overreacted." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 390

You deserved it 3 560

BadKitty14 7

Monday 8 April 2013 3:16

Maybe you should test his reaction time by punching him in the balls.

RainbowDashie140 12

Monday 8 April 2013 3:15

I would work on those reactions.

Comments

revolution4ever 14

Monday 8 April 2013 3:26

Punch him in the balls. Use the excuse that you needed a punching bag.

waffule365 16

Monday 8 April 2013 3:27

This reminds me of the Pink Panther .movie with Steve Martin.

jem970 19

Monday 8 April 2013 3:30

Punch him in the balls while you are down there and tell him his pain tolerance needs work.

perdix 29

Monday 8 April 2013 3:38

He was "correct." It's OK for a charity boxing match, they always want to see some poor bastard with terrible reflexes get beaten to a pulp. Ironically, the more nobler the charity, the more blood-thirsty those motherfuckers are. If you're fighting for The Sisters of the Poor, then want to see you lose an organ.