Health, Poopoo peepee and Accident: Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately,...

By pooplife - 30/11/2014 19:32 - United Kingdom - Nottingham

Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for a moment, stunned, still pooping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 251

You deserved it 4 962

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Same thing different taste

Thanks, Mr Whiskers

By Anonymous - 01/02/2012 06:13 - Canada

Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 873

You deserved it 5 975

By SeatofIgnorance - 29/08/2017 04:30

Today, during an emergency bathroom visit, I finally broke the toilet seat my fiance had nagged me for months to replace. The broken seat sent me sprawling to the floor. I was still shitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 680

You deserved it 4 973

By Anonymous - 17/03/2011 18:57 - United States

Today, after speeding home due to an overflowing bladder, I ran to the bathroom, forgetting that the toilet seat was broken. While doing my business, the toilet seat and I both slid off the bowl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 006

You deserved it 7 030

Humpty Dumpy

By traumatized - 12/04/2014 18:07 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I was taking the biggest shit of my life. When I worked the thing out, it hit the water with such force that I got a toilet water enema from the backwash. I was so freaked out that I screamed and fell off the seat, prompting my husband to rush in to see what was wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 436

You deserved it 9 394

Bustin' my ass

By Anonymous - 07/10/2020 20:01

Today, I went in for an interview. While I was waiting to be called, I used the restroom. When I stood up to wipe, I slipped on the floor and fell ass first into the unflushed toilet. I was found an hour later, covered in my own shit and too injured to move. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 418

You deserved it 182

By jbhadafuckedupday - 15/03/2018 01:30

Today, my 3-year-old came to me very excited because he had gone to the bathroom by himself for the first time. What he did not tell me was that he had shit on the floor, and when I went into the bathroom to check, I slipped on a turd and knocked myself out on the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 083

You deserved it 445

By BrownDump - 14/05/2011 10:43 - United States

Today, I was taking a dump and I pushed so hard that I got light headed and passed out on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 317

You deserved it 14 182

Shitty situation

By Anonymous - 21/11/2022 22:00

Today, I had explosive diarrhea. I got off the toilet to change my 3 year-old's poopy diaper. He was being stubborn, so I was going to go back to the toilet, which is when he laid down. I thought I could do it. I couldn't. He ran around diaperless as I ran back to the toilet with liquid shit running down my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 163

Sprinkler system

By missed - 25/06/2021 14:01 - United States

Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 257

You deserved it 1 377

Fast and Furious

By TooQuick - 27/04/2016 12:19 - Mozambique - Maputo

Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 010

You deserved it 2 788

lambda_fml 40

Monday 1 December 2014 9:57

Holy shit!

cakefete2 30

Monday 1 December 2014 13:40

That's extra funny given your profile pic. Btw, do you Noah guy who can fix OP's toilet seat?

Comments

ZoroMiHawk 25

Monday 1 December 2014 10:14

If you sat down and the seat slid immediately, how is it possible that you were "still pooping" when you were on the floor? You didn't even have to time to start pooping in the first place.

mikepzz 27

Monday 1 December 2014 10:59

Must've had to go really badly, but I agree. It sounds fishy :o

barbsillvy 10

Monday 1 December 2014 10:16

I'm laughing so hard that I woke my daughter up! Lol

man_in_black08 28

Monday 1 December 2014 10:17

If OP is a girl, i can imagine how ****** this situation can be for you :) But if OP is a man...oh common its bro code tht we do far worse stuff sometimes :P

keiNan_fml 35

Monday 1 December 2014 10:20

unless op is high

Cooldude6158 22

Monday 1 December 2014 10:31

Well that stinks!

sweetest_jenn 18

Monday 1 December 2014 10:36

That's one way to take a dump lol

worldclassrager 39

Monday 1 December 2014 11:07

That may have been a prank that you accidentally fell into...

timmeeeee 10

Monday 1 December 2014 13:40

The toilet was thinking of you the whole time.

ShadowPsychosis 4

Monday 1 December 2014 13:46

Used to have a few issues with our toilet seat becoming detached and needing replacing every few months, we switched to a seat with metal fixings joining it to the bowl over the usual plastic, never had an issue again. I had a sudden drop in blood pressure once and passed out on the toilet, woke up on the floor having a fit, to this day I'm amazed i didn't have an accident on the floor. A shower, some bleach and a mop will soon sort you out.