Miscellaneous: Today, I put cucumber slices on my eyes to help me relax. I found... - FML

By jumpy - 03/01/2010 23:59 - United States

Today, I put cucumber slices on my eyes to help me relax. I found this very calming till I woke up to ants trying to eat my eyes out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 617

You deserved it 6 551

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Same thing different taste

By lemonhead - 23/05/2011 01:58

Today, my husband and I had just got over a big argument, and I asked him to cut me some cucumbers for my eyes to help me relax. I was laying down, eyed closed, and he set them on my eyes. They weren't cucumbers, they were lemons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 918

You deserved it 47 454

Nature finds a way

By Anonymous - 13/04/2023 18:00 - United Kingdom - Brighton

Today, I decided to take a nap in the park. I found a nice shady spot and closed my eyes. When I woke up, I realized I had fallen asleep on an ant hill. My entire body was riddled with ants. FML

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You deserved it 430

Code red

By Zooep - 24/10/2016 13:54

Today, I had to prepare for my big meeting tomorrow morning. Before going to bed, I washed my face. Unfortunately, the towel I wiped myself with turned out to house our red ant infestation. My face looks like a ripe tomato. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 733

You deserved it 788

By ewicsmelly - 29/12/2010 02:13 - United States

Today, I kept finding ants crawling all over my face. After a while, I realized that they were all coming from my beard. I have had a population of ants living in my beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 751

You deserved it 56 752

Freak Scene

By antsgomarching - 06/10/2020 17:01

Today, I was sleeping in my bed when I felt an itch on my arm. Then another. Then another. I finally looked to see what was going on, only to find a bunch of ants crawling in my bed. They were somehow getting in through the closed window. Guess I’m done sleeping tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 285

You deserved it 103

By Steve - 24/02/2011 19:32 - United States

Today, I put aftershave on my fingers to encourage myself to stop biting my nails. I absentmindedly rubbed my eye a few minutes later. It burnt like hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 677

You deserved it 36 210

By Anonymous - 04/09/2014 06:44 - United States - Saginaw

Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 537

You deserved it 3 837

By Anonymous - 05/06/2017 22:00

Today, I woke up early to weird scratching and smacking noises. After gathering enough courage to check what it was, I found out it was just an ant stuck on a piece of paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 205

You deserved it 341

Chip on your shoulder

By Anonymous - 28/08/2021 13:59 - United States

Today, I woke up at 2 a.m. and ate some chips that were on my nightstand, totally unaware that they were covered in ants. Now I have two swollen lips and my kid’s birthday party is tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 389

You deserved it 1 110

By tommy3824 - 20/08/2009 12:45 - United States

Today, was the first day all week I got to sleep in. I woke up this beautiful morning to the sun shining in my window and hundreds of carpenter ants crawling over my sheets and me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 568

You deserved it 3 079

Next

Top comments

Reyo 2

Monday 4 January 2010 9:08

What is the reasoning behind putting sliced veggies on your face to relax? Will sticking a carrot up my ass achieve the same effect?

paprikacha 9

Monday 4 January 2010 9:24

It's supposed to reduce puffiness/dark circles under the eyes. I've never done it myself, so I have no idea how well it really works when you just use actual cucumber slices instead of the cosmetic cucumber pads they sell. Just saying there's a legitimate reason behind it and OP isn't just crazy. : )

Comments

supmofukka 0

Monday 4 January 2010 10:10

where the fudge do u live where u cant hav cucumbers on ur eyes without ants tryin to eat them out (lol) ydi for havin an infestation....or for makin this up

gurlgonemadd 0

Monday 4 January 2010 10:21

Reyo- u rocked my socks off lmfao! ur comment was way better then the FML itself......thx i needed that

SenGaeriel 3

Monday 4 January 2010 10:28

OMFG! That is just creepy. You can get ants in the winter. I got them worse in the winter than summer. They like the heat.

fyl11122233 0

Wednesday 4 May 2011 15:54

exactly! therefore this FML is not fake.

mollywebster55 0

Monday 4 January 2010 11:00

How the hell could you of typed this when you said that ants were eating your eyes out - you would be blind!

cynima 0

Monday 4 January 2010 11:38

Dear, she said trying. Trying.

lizzard01 4

Monday 25 July 2011 23:12

maybe they succeeded. Molly, ! WIN !

maxene 0

Monday 4 January 2010 11:15

This probably isnt true because cucumbers repel ants, it has some compound known as "trans-2-nonenal" that repels ants as well as cockroaches.

Flutist 3

Monday 4 January 2010 17:47

Cucumber and citrus peels are toxic to the types of fungi that ants feed on.

Yulia_fml 0

Monday 4 January 2010 21:18

If it's the cucumber peel that's toxic, and these cucumbers were sliced, then it's possible that they could've crawled onto the cucumber.

LauraTheKiwi 0

Monday 4 January 2010 11:25

LOL REYO. ;D YDI for not checking the cucumbers. But I like the way this FML is worded. :L

allmidnighteyes 10

Monday 4 January 2010 12:46

get an illustrizzy for this up in hurr

Jokaka 0

Monday 4 January 2010 14:07

haha rontflmao

cel123456789 0

Monday 4 January 2010 15:09

lmfao reyo

GanjAxZermA 0

Monday 4 January 2010 16:37

ouch!! sorry :(

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