Miscellaneous: Today, I needed money to go to the movie. I asked my mom if I...

By Noname - 13/03/2009 23:04 - United States

Today, I needed money to go to the movie. I asked my mom if I could reach in her purse and grab a few bucks. When I opened up her purse her phone started to vibrate. I yelled over to my mom that her phone was ringing. She said the phone was next to her. I looked in the purse. It was a vibrator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 279

You deserved it 5 337

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Eye bleach

By Anonymous - 06/11/2023 12:00

Today, I handed my mother-in-law my phone to see the toy that I was going to get for my nephew. While she had the phone, it swiped away to my last search of… vibrators and sex toys. I have no idea if she saw it before she handed me my phone back, saying, "It went away." FML

I agree, your life sucks 187

You deserved it 414

By Anonymous - 28/11/2016 06:34

Today, I was talking to my mother when we both heard a continuous buzzing noise. Unable to locate the source of the noise we gave up. About an hour later, my mother yells down the stairs to me. Turns out my dog stole my vibrator, chewed it and presented it to my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 394

You deserved it 1 581

By Nikse - 29/07/2009 07:23 - United States

Today, I was at the store with my mother in the facial care section. I found this device that scrubs your face with those anti-bacterial pads. The aisle was crowded and noisy, so I shouted to my mother, "Can I have this vibrator thing?" It went silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 353

You deserved it 52 026

By Sarah - 25/08/2009 16:04 - United Kingdom

Today, my mother was cleaning out my underwear drawer and found my vibrator. Everytime I see her in the hall, she just cracks up and makes jokes about how I can't get a guy, so I have to rely on electronics. What's worse, she told my dad AND posted a status on facebook about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 615

You deserved it 10 408

By anon - 16/02/2014 12:56 - Australia - Kingston

Today, I needed to borrow money from my girlfriend. I went into her bag and pulled out the money all while a lady watched me open-mouthed. Turns out it wasn't my girlfriend's bag. It belonged to the lady watching me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 487

You deserved it 20 170

By Mygawdwhy - 21/01/2018 01:30

Today, I gave my mom an extra pillow since the ones in the guest room were too flat and hurt her neck. Hours later, I remembered that I'd stashed my vibrator in that pillowcase during a romantic camping trip with my husband. She found it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 177

You deserved it 2 048

By Anonymous - 01/03/2013 07:02 - United States - San Jose

Today, after working out at the gym, I went to grab my bag, and realized that my phone was missing. Panicking, I reached into my pocket, pulled out my phone, and dialed my mom's number to tell her I'd lost it. It took me until the last ring to realize what I was doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 961

You deserved it 41 445

By Handblocked - 04/09/2018 06:00

Today, I got a new vibrator, raced all the way home, tore my pants off, took it out of the box, and then my grandmother walked in my front door. Apparently she's spending the night so she can make it to a doctor appointment in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 380

You deserved it 613

Technically, that's stealing

By Elizabeth Ann - 04/10/2019 22:00

Today, I told my mom about the $50 I'd hidden in case of an emergency, and how I couldn't find it. She said she'd borrowed it last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 657

You deserved it 173

On the run

By Allen - 05/01/2010 06:40 - France

Today, I was in a hurry to catch a plane. I got halfway to the airport when I realized I'd forgotten my phone. I drove back to the house and searched for it. I finally gave up and returned to the airport, only to find that I was 10 minutes late for my plane. Just then, my pocket vibrated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 922

You deserved it 40 507

OperationNicole_fml 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 4:25

She carries a vibrator in her purse. Whoa that's pretty intense, can't wait to get home?

W33nie 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 4:28

Why are there so many vibrator stories

Comments

iammeanttolive 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 4:56

I am sorry you had to experience that.

dsnelf 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 5:13

Never ever go into a womans handbag, even if they tell you too.

toaster468 0

Friday 19 March 2010 21:57

she is a woman too why don't you look at the SEX of the person!?! So she should know is that like the craze wit all the moms? carry around ******? maybe she shows her boss and that's why she gets promoted alot!

rawblerawble 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 5:21

that's why you never EVER look into women's handbags. They are like men's pandora's box except there is no hope inside.

toaster468 0

Friday 19 March 2010 21:59

only ****** and money

pippacrawford 4

Sunday 29 January 2012 8:02

You'd think a guy would like that....

lolol182 4

Saturday 14 March 2009 5:30

never know when she might need it

foolishwolf 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 5:31

hahaha @ #13

kellster 2

Saturday 14 March 2009 5:32

Bravo to your mom for still being a sexual person! If you can't handle that, you need to grow up a little. It means there may be hope for your sexual vitality when your her age!

Herropreez17 0

Wednesday 7 September 2011 18:53

At #16 if you found a vibrator in your moms purse you could be 50 years old or 10 years old, its still disgusting. Also how would you react if that happened to you? I doubt you would praise your mom in that situation.