Intimacy: Today, I'm having a nice evening out on the town. After my complimentary...

By Anonymous - 07/05/2010 08:30 - United States

Today, I'm having a nice evening out on the town. After my complimentary round of drinks for my birthday, my friend walks in with a big pink gift-box. It was an inflatable... erm... 'friend.' Which then got unwrapped in front of several of my other friends. And several members of my family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 904

You deserved it 4 927

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

By reallyman__639 - 13/12/2011 12:26 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend took me to dinner and near the end, he pulled out a long, rectangular box. Thinking it was a necklace, I got very excited. It was a wand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 556

You deserved it 17 501

By AMIGODO - 12/02/2011 15:13 - Netherlands

Today, It was my birthday and my friends came to celebrate it. My parents thought it would be funny to give me a vibrator in front of everybody. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 848

You deserved it 5 114

Thanks, I hate it

By Anonymous - 11/12/2009 16:52 - United States

Today, it's my birthday and my friends and I went to our favorite pub to celebrate. As I'm a little broke at the moment, they all offered to buy me birthday drinks. Which I later learned meant that they would order them for me and bring them to the table, but put everything on my tab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 537

You deserved it 2 916

Fake news!

By Anon - 28/11/2023 14:00 - Canada

Today, after I tried to plan a surprise party for my friend, and a series of miscommunications and accidental reveals, it turned it into a surprise party for myself. I walked into a room filled with people shouting, "Surprise!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 156

By thrifty gone wrong - 28/01/2013 17:24 - United States - El Cajon

Today, I received a birthday present from a friend. It was the very same gift I gave to her for Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 037

You deserved it 4 336

By Mazzam - 19/11/2008 11:33 - France

Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me the present she'd bought for me. I said, joking, "I hope it's not a tie!" It was a tie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 271

You deserved it 18 560

By abc - 27/05/2009 10:15 - Pakistan

Today, I took my friends out to an expensive restaurant for my birthday treat. They had arranged for a surprise birthday cake for me which I cut, very happily, while they chanted birthday wishes. When the bill came, I discovered I was supposed to pay for my great 'surprise' cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 412

You deserved it 5 360

By Brittany - 10/04/2009 20:07 - United States

Today, my boyfriend's friends were throwing him a surprise birthday party. I thought it'd be funny to get him some fuzzy handcuffs and a box of condoms as a gift. They never told me they invited his parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 100

You deserved it 49 920

By unappreciated - 25/06/2009 02:38 - United States

Today, I took my best friend out to dinner for my birthday. She gave me a gift after I paid the tab saying, "my mom thought you would like this - it was expensive." It was a lovely set of origami paper, which was the exact set I brought her as a souvenir from Japan. She was right, it was expensive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 800

You deserved it 2 813

What a thoughtful gift

By Natsert99 - 08/12/2016 14:02 - United States - Deerfield

Today, I brought my best friend to the strip club as a birthday gift, as he had mentioned that he'd never been to one before. It might have been ruined by the discovery that his daughter had a new job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 112

You deserved it 1 243

marinus_fml 19

Friday 7 May 2010 16:02

is he talking about a blow up doll? if so, that's hilarious :)

skyeyez9 24

Friday 7 May 2010 16:06

Well, at least your friends love ya. Some fml's on here talk about friends not showing up at their b day party, stiffing them with a huge restaurant bill, or significant other dumping them at their own party.

Comments

perdix 29

Friday 7 May 2010 16:43

You're family is hoping you'll marry her because she'll be the "fun one" of the couple. If they have to tolerate your pathetic, whiny ass at Thanksgiving, the least they should get are endless ******** from your ... erm... friend.

Supersonic54 18

Friday 7 May 2010 16:52

what's the friend she's talking about? a *****, vibrator, other things?

doogy15 11

Tuesday 27 September 2011 2:09

Your an idiot

keven501 12

Saturday 20 April 2013 5:16

It's a blow up sex doll you retard

babyteef 0

Friday 7 May 2010 16:53

lyk omg ur lyf iz soo ovr. GET A SENSE OF HUMOR! If they found your personal blowup doll hidden in your closet then yes, FYL. This happens to everyone.

steve_jobs_fml 0

Friday 7 May 2010 17:04

you seem to have some experience about blow up dolls

babyteef 0

Friday 7 May 2010 17:14

Do I? What in my comment suggests that? haha I don't because I prefer real people to plastic.

Captain_Cupcake 0

Friday 7 May 2010 16:54

I have a cousin who has a pretty big ego. We got him one of these and it was pretty funny. Even funnier a few months later when he was giving his mate a lift in the car, and when going through the boot his mate was like "What's this?". Turned out my cousin put it in the boot and forgot about it. Gotta have a sense of humour about these things. Particularly at 18ths.

stewpididiot 11

Friday 7 May 2010 17:13

You should have looked at it, Yelled "This has been used"!, and thrown it at him !!

brii_g 0

Friday 7 May 2010 17:23

u put this on BMS too. erh

sexysue 0

Friday 7 May 2010 17:25

happy bday. lol

macgirl21 0

Friday 7 May 2010 17:43

thts funny as hell. me and my friends have done tht as a present many times and it's always funny. why you so uptight?

skyeyez9 24

Friday 7 May 2010 17:51

When I was deployed, a friend if mine was given a blow up doll as a joke. A few days later, the doll had army acu's someone put on it. Another guy somehow got her an access badge made with her pic on it. The building we lived in had our names on the door and someone wrote "Apple" underneath which was the doll's name. It kinda became a company mascot, and was hilarious to see "Apple" sitting at a desk with her vacant stare and open mouth while strategic meetings were going in.