By eww. - 22/03/2013 05:28 - Australia

Today, I kissed my gorgeous new boyfriend for the first time. I ran my hands through his hair; a multitude of dandruff rained out and five lice crawled onto my hand. FML
I agree, your life sucks 56 359
You deserved it 7 199

Same thing different taste

Comments

Lice would be a deal breaker. That's extremely unhygienic.

CharresBarkrey 15

Lice don't like dirty hair, they like clean hair. Also, it's incredibly contagious. It's unhygienic in the same way catching the chicken pox would be.

It's just like catching a cold from someone. The cleanest kid could end up with lice, it's not restricted to dirty little bastards.

surfergirl72 7

#18, Lice prefer clean hair. Easier to move around and lay their eggs. Dirty hair is like driving on a dirty highway. Lice sucks. But it happens. OP, go buy treatment YESTERDAY!!!!!!

perdix 29

You could give him Head 'n Shoulders. If you're on a tight budget, you can leave out the Shoulders.

sugarshane007 20

Don't judge perdix. Some people like getting a little shoulder from time to time.

sugarshane007 20

I followed you on that until you sullied your comment with Beiber and Twilight. Those two things have no place on FML. Please leave now, and you will be required to turn in your badges at the front desk. Thank you.

28 - Maybe it's just me, but I kind of thought that EC and JB were thrown in there because they're as revolting as the others.

sugarshane007 20

31- Bull dung is still a higher ranking than they deserve. However, I will give you credit for a nice try. 37- Nope, they are more revolting. Clearly, you've never had to truly experience Beiber. Those scars do not heal.

OP- Your FML made me throw up in my mouth a little- I'd suggest a sheep dip for your louse-y boy friend before you get to second base- who knows what you'll find after you slurp up the chocolate knob-syrup if you don't full body dip him first!! Word to the wise, fumigate him before you fornicate!!

Five lice crawling onto your hand is extremely unlikely; they're attached little *******. Good luck with this guy- lice are the ******* devil.

wannabesinger 16

Thank you! I was unfortunate enough to have lice a few times in my childhood and only ONCE did I have a louse come out under my fingernail from scratching. Sorry, I don't believe this FML.

Actually, when lice have been there for a prolonged period that get bigger and the bugs actually crawl around and can definitely crawl off into your hand. I've seen it first-hand. and yes, it's absolutely disgusting!

Ewww.He needs to hit that mane n tail antidandruff shampoo.

Man the sudden change of tone really took me by surprise, kudos on the wording of this FML.

Shampooing would be too easy! Give that guy a monkey; they'll be his personal de-licer!

perdix 29

If he's got all that vermin and detritus on his head, we can only imagine the pestilence in his pants!

perdix 29

#56, huh? I wasn't paying attention, I was daydreaming about forming a band called Pestilience in the Pants. Does anyone out there play instruments? My role in the band would to sit in a recliner on the side of the stage and type sarcastic comments about the show, the audience and my fellow bandmates to be shown on the Jumbotron above the stage. Who's in? World tour!

upallnight11 19

At least he's gorgeous. Still not acceptable though.

Not Acceptble?uh...#35,just because she got some lice doesn't mean she's gonna break-up with him.Honestly,when has someone ever broke someone up for lice?

upallnight11 19

My comment doesn't say OP is going to break up with her boyfriend so... By the way her boyfriend had lice not OP