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This is why bro's have the now written rule of blaming any bathroom trouble on at least one other person. You must not be a bro.

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It was awkward, if not rude to offer help rhetorically. How does one help? OP: "Oh yes, will you please wash and dry my ass? I don't want to get drippy sticky shit on my fingers."

how'd she know your name?? lol thats kind of creepy that she would say your name.. despite the fact you're trying to go to the bathroom.. just awkward... wow

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Maybe she recognized OPs shoes. The most important things my parents have taught me about taking a dump at work/public restrooms is crumple four gaskets and throw it in the toilet to minimize getting splashed and lift your feet so nobody can see you.

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Yeah.. U don't talk to ppl in the bathroom Like that randomly though even if she knows her at work... It's called let me shit in peace bitch...

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"We also have the less popular 'Nobody Poops but You'." "Well, we're Catholic, so..." "Ah, in that case, you want 'You're a Naughty Child and that's Concentrated Evil Coming out the Back of You.'" +6 internets to the first to get where this quote is from!

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You win six internets. Strange that you hate the show, yet can name the quote. I hate the new episodes. The old ones are gold, though. A lot of the early quotes, like that one are hilarious. Here's a few of my favorites: (Peter recalling the vacuum cleaning guy, who he thinks is a huge jerk) Vaccuum guy: We fixed your vaccuum cleaner. It seems the problem was a half-eaten meatball lodged in the vaccuum intake. Peter: Well did you keep it? Vaccuum guy (with a puzzled look on his face): U

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every single one of those quotes went through my head in the proper voice and it made me really happy.

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Well done #41: See, I wanted to thumb you down, bit because your comment was so long (and not funny at all), I just couldn't do it from my iPod. Well done. Just, well done.

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