83
Add a comment
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Create my account Sign in
Top comments
By  TheHeirofTime  |  32

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

By  usnwife  |  26

If you had clearly said you were going to pay I can understanding her being upset, but even so she overreacted and is a bitch. Could you not have offered to pay her back though and avoided it being an issue? I think it's safe to say you lucked out though, she doesn't seem worth your time.

Comments
By  TheHeirofTime  |  32

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

Reply
  anon4ever  |  32

We don't know who asked who to the date. If he made it obvious to her that he was going to pay and then she ends up having to pay for both of them, I can understand her being upset. But not hearing him out sucks.

Reply
  Catdragon  |  32

Usually the one who asks is the one who pays. She may have been in a tight spot herself and couldn't afford this restaurant. Op could have told her before hand or said something like I'll pay, only to realize they didn't have their wallet. Then it looks really bad to the other person who was expecting to not have to pay.

Reply
  sophiehelen  |  32

She didn't necessarily expect him to pay, we shouldn't assume. They may have been going halves on the meal, that's fairly standard practice. if I were in that situation I'd be pissed off too if looked like the other person was trying to shift the bill onto you to be fair

Reply
  PrincessShiraz  |  32

how is this getting upvotes? It wasn't Chili's, he said it was a nice restaurant. If you ask someone else to an expensive restaurant, YOU pay. This know-it-all kneejerk reaction in the name of "equality" needs to stop. He could have asked her by saying, "can I take you to dinner?" i.e. "can I pay for your meal at a restaurant?" She could be really broke trying to make ends meet and paying nearly wiped out her bank account. I think she should take his call and hear him out but she could have had a terrible experience before with a lying, cheap jerk - they do exist, you know.

Reply
  TheHeirofTime  |  32

Those are all good points, however, I find it immature she didn't answer his calls to at least hear him out. Then he can't pay or explain. I'd be upset too but I'd give him another chance.

Reply
  ShotaSammy  |  32

Hell if she expected him to pay, its lucky she even had money on her. I've been on dates where the other person is paying so I don't bother grabbing my wallet and just grab essentials like my id and phone

Reply
  writerchic85  |  32

I'm sorry but you don't ask someone out on a date and then expect them to pay. At most they should pay for their half but not the whole date. That's not how asking someone out works. Unless it's sorted out otherwise, the Asker should be prepared to handle the check. Op should have made sure he had his wallet.

Reply
  Demon_of_Light  |  32

While I agree that she is overreacting and should probably hear OP out, I think there's another factor that's been forgotten. She thinks OP lied. For me, expecting to be paid for and then suddenly being asked to pay would be a minor inconvenience, but being lied to would be a huge issue. Not only is the "I forgot my wallet" line cheap, it also insults her intelligence, calls OP's character into question, and makes her doubtful of OP's motivation for asking her out. Granted, in this case, it wasn't actually a line, but she had no way of knowing that. Although I do think it would be fairer to give OP a chance to explain.

Reply

#16 Even if she thought he was taking advantage, she is acting like a childish moron because 1/ she won’t give him the benefit of the doubt, 2/ she will not give him the chance to pay her back. When I used to date (I’m married now), I would have never expected a man to pay for me, even if he asked me out. You say yes to a date because you’re interested in the person asking you, so it’s a win-win. Getting a free meal is a bonus that should not be expected all the time. If they offer, it’s nice and obviously up to you to accept. You can also offer to buy dinner yourself or split the bill.

By  usnwife  |  26

If you had clearly said you were going to pay I can understanding her being upset, but even so she overreacted and is a bitch. Could you not have offered to pay her back though and avoided it being an issue? I think it's safe to say you lucked out though, she doesn't seem worth your time.

Reply
  Catdragon  |  26

As someone on a budget, if someone offered to take me out to a restaurant and took me to an expensive place then told me they couldn't pay, I'd be upset too.

Reply
  Mauskau  |  26

A guy offered to take me out to dinner after the cinema, but he didn't drive so I had to pick him up. Once I had picked him up, I paid for the cinema as the food was going to be more expensive, we went to the restaurant of his choosing, ate, and when it came to him paying his half of the bill his card was declined. So I ended up having to pay for that too. To top it off, the guy ended up being a creep and telling people I was his girlfriend before the date even finished. OP's situation seems a little different though.

Reply
  tido26  |  17

If you don't have a car and don't drink alcohol it would make sense, but even so it tends to be one of those things you get in the habit of having when you leave the house, just like your house keys

By  TheBiggerBoot  |  39

I don't know why you wouldn't double check having your wallet before going out like this. I also don't get everyone saying OP dodged a bullet, if OP implied they'd pay then pulled this she has every right to be upset.

Reply
  Maat_Attack  |  39

I don't think it is the fact that she is upset. That is understandable. It is the fact that she isn't even hearing OP out and letting him explain let alone, I am assuming, being able to pay her back. That part is the overreaction and bullet dodge people are referring to. But that is just how I am reading and viewing things

Reply

So if someone routinely lacks responsibility (and I'm exaggerating to make a point), it would be okay if they had feelings for each other? Setting yourself up for a lot of disappointment if you really believe that. She overreacted by not answering his calls but she had every right to be upset if he said he was going to pay and then couldn't.

Reply
  Bearsmomma  |  41

#10 said "...so upset." I took that to mean if there was a connection she shouldn't have overreacted, which it seems you agree. She has every right to be upset, but should speak to him at least once to hear him out. It's like you're arguing but also agree so I'm confused a bit.

Loading data…