By NoToBombs - 07/11/2014 15:51 - United States - Santa Fe

Today, I got a new roommate. I thought he was pretty cool until he mentioned how everything around us was a conspiracy. Then he asked if I knew how to make a bomb. FML
I agree, your life sucks 35 354
You deserved it 2 749
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

darwinism 30

Every time he says something, look from side to side and whisper "shhh, they might be listening".

140 2

Comments

Corey122726 17

Sparklers.......... Lots and lots of sparklers wrapped tightly together duct tape.

15 5
cakefete2 30

Don't use duct tape. That stuff is so strong it will absorb the blast.

18 2
devildog562 33

Naw duct tape will work but it also gets you a felony in the former of a terrorist device. 9-11 laws were exploited. Picalo petes + bottle+ duct tape= trip to court house + $1000 fine. Lucky the judge dismissed the felony charge, but I still have troopers every year come to the house around the 4th of July to check on me.

2 2
DenverTyrrell 13

He could have just been joking...but just in case call the FBI, Army, military, police, the fire department, your mum, his mum and the ghost busters

49 4
Ichiya 29

And the restaurant down the street. All that dialing will work up a good hunger.

11 3
LikeYouGiveAShit 27

He will be laughing when the illuminati kills us all!

12 4
RA91 26

This is exactly why I can't have roommates, lmao!!!

1 3
cakefete2 30

Why is that? Is it because they post FMLs about things you asked them in private?

17 2
Ichiya 29

No because they wont share their bomb making secrets.

1 0
ostfaiz 18

Dont tell he is from Al Qaeda

0 16
NoTreble 5

You are part of the reason why we can't all get along. I hope you're happy to be part of active segregation, discrimination and stereotyping.

5 3
Ichiya 29

There was no race mentioned in the fml. The worst thing #18 did was stereotype Al Qaeda members as bomb loving conspiracy nuts.

1 1
martin8337 35

I think that you have an Al Qaeda or ISIS living with you. I think that I would contact Homeland Security if I were you.

1 7
RedPillSucks 31

Or a spawn of Timothy McVeigh, Eric Rudolph, or Ted Kazinsky

7 1
NoTreble 5

Well, aren't you awfully stereotypical to still be a member of a progressive human race?

1 3
worldclassrager 39

Google will be his friend...just have him not do it around the house/dorm...

0 2
Marielle_T 10

I hope you don't sleep too hard OP because you might have to keep an eye on him at all time

1 1